listen I have watched my kid play through cup head, Elden ring AND hollow knight and you people are legit asking for all of this. what is going on. it's frightening

honestly this should be put on a plaque and hung at every public park in the country

going to bed hours but me and kid just discovered that the posable action figures with magnet feet STICK TO THE TRUCK SCREWS of his new tech decks and folks. FOLKS. we're gonna get some sick tricks

Comment “ACAB” at checkout and I’ll make sure you get one of these 

first the pope now this

WHAT IS HAPPENING I MIGHT RUN THROUGH A WALL

I might watch that wemby dunk 200 more times

that wemby dunk elevated me to a different plane of existence. a much funnier one for sure

um I'm going to need this giffed like, asap good god

um, Mae Martin, hello

okay legit, does he also have a brain worm? maybe also a tape worm?

I should be over here more than I think to be... so apologies there. I do have a text club! Opinions/info on Bills WR pursuits, and plans. The Sabres... uh... well... changing things soon? Text me directly through it, we can chat. Two weeks free to try it out! joinsubtext.com/the30club

WHAT

it would be a whole thing

i cannot stop laughing

i’ve met so many of my local mutuals in person and all i had to say was i was jane because all everyone did on my twitter was post “…jane” in my replies

I want to like this jets coach but he's playing coward ball. what is he fucking thinking here.

seems like you were 18 years late bud

the crowd reaction is perfection holy shit

I haven't been supplexed by sports this hard in a long long time

are people not chewing their oreos. this is just a pre-chewed oreo

listen the bishops thing would be funner if they didn't in the same breath banned gender affirming care in catholic hospitals so you know. let's maybe pump the brakes.

I am a 42 year old woman and I have a firm cut-off age of 35. if you are an old rich dude about to kick the bucket you can dm only if you're ready to give me half of everything. those are the rules.

I enjoy* that this seems to be something that happens every year. *find it cosmically humorous

just poured my aldi red bull into my vitamin infused powder water as if executive function is at the bottom of this bottle

BREAKING: Neighbors, we need you on Elmwood at 4:30 today! There was an ICE raid this morning. #Buffalo @buffalolos.bsky.social @buffalonews.com @7news-wkbw.bsky.social @btpmnpr.bsky.social

i truly think it was @jcsalterego.bsky.social lol we’ve been here a looooooong time

anyways juniper just curled up and squeezed out the most cartoon lil fart i have ever heard

she should be on the sex offender registry. Like not even hyperbole.

it’s a tricky genre but i’m on my third horror book in a row that is unfolding to be a very special thing. i put some info about each in the alt text!

the payoff is just…😚👌

oh NO oh DEAR junie outgrew all her little sweaters and hoodies from last year?!?! you mean i HAVE to shop for cute little dog clothes?! THE HUMANITY!

i wear roundy glasses. i was standing outside a pub in the middle of the day & three drunk women came out dressed up to the nines. one of them fell flat on her arse. i awkwardly shuffled, indecisive about whether to intervene. her friend seeing this shouted "even harry potter wouldn't help you up!!"

I also once wore a brown leather jacket and tan chinos and my friend Yvonne said "You look like a big poo" bsky.app/profile/pfto...

When he was 13, my cousin got his hair bleached Eminem-style and we all called him Luminous Julius.

FURIOUS I can’t find it anymore but the one that always makes me laugh is the guy who wore a jacket with a letter Y on it and someone said “yeah, Y for wanker”

My mate from school is still called Banana to this day cause he wore yellow wellys to class once when he was like 9

I seem to be getting credit for this, so found the original.

Did that include the one about the shorter of two Tonys, known as Shetland Tony? I still laugh about that regularly.

They were kind of pale looking and badly cut. Villainous. Long time ago now. I’d put them on and it’d be ‘well, you’ve done your time’ or ‘hoping you can go straight now’. More than flesh and blood could bear.

Jumping on this bandwagon - I once wore a bandana to work and my coworker called me "Marge Simpson's crime pal"

Wore a white linen shirt as a teenager. That was immediately known as “the blouse” in my friend group

I wear all black and in college I bleached my hair white. I walked into a class and the lecturer said I looked like a pint of guinness 💀

Wearing a nice hat. Quietly going about my day. Woman shouted over to me “you think you’re something special in that fucking hat do you?” 😳

Said this the last time around but in my late teens i played football with a lad who's friends all called him 'Moses' because he wore sandals once, when he was 9. Still dont know his real name to this day...

My neighbour once admired my denim jacket and jeans by saying she liked my 'trouser suit'. I never wore them together again.