Study: 97% Of All Sounds Infuriating https://theonion.com/study-97-of-all-sounds-infuriating/

I think Microsoft snuck AI into the spell check

going back in time to kill baby computer

We still use the term “horsepower” right in front of horses “That dumb truck you’re dragging these people past is the equivalent of hundreds of you but & it doesn’t even need one shit-catching bag plus it ruins things for everyone in a hundred different ways anyway here’s an apple you dumb idiot”

Hey man I’ll go all the way to the Green Album

The kind of shit System of a Down put at the start of a song

‘Goat tiered pint glass’ is the kind of shit I’d write on instagram if I’d been abducted

I bet being incinerated by pyroclastic flow would feel amazing for a half second

Best money I spend every month

Rising Conservative Star Just Guy Wearing Nazi Armband And Crying https://theonion.com/rising-conservative-star-just-guy-wearing-nazi-armband-1849855062/

Kan-chan, a pink penguin who is often mistaken an enema, is the mascot for Ichijiku enemas.

Memento Milki

had a little laugh to myself remembering Hoppers' bit where the beaver avatar holds the railing going down the stairs, such a fun film

Wha the fuck

Met someone bowling tonight who explained this tattoo as being a tribute to Red Dead Redemption

Carter: Colonel! O'Neill (p90 pointed offscreen): come on, Daniel, what does it say? Daniel Jackson: well if Im reading this right, they worshipped a being named "Miette", who had the power to imprison you for... one thousand years... Teal'c: I believe it would be most unwise to awaken this "Miette"

She looks like an Adam Driver cat NOT THAT ITS A BAD THING

Said the glowworm to the lawnmower

given the modern conservative fascination with Sparta it's at least a little funny that they've engineered a situation in which Persia is able to level a dramatically uneven battlefield by forcing the conflict into a narrow pathway

UK SNL was never going to be my thing but pretty sure they used AI to generate some of the images

I follow a book influencer and they simply are too drunk to read that much

Princess Diana supreme shirt when

Optimising business to business marketing solutions on the dock of the bay

Genuinely thought I was being sold a portable guillotine

I love how my cat petulantly paws open the door just wide enough for her when I’m trying to leave the room

Went rock climbing for first time in several decades and my soft city hands feel as if they’ve been in a wood chipper

Yeah I respond really well to passive aggressiveness

if you have one helicopter, you really need two helicopters because one is always going to be in the hanger getting fixed so you might as well just rent them, follow me for more #moneysavingtips

Why do British expats in Australia post about their lifestyle being awesome as if they’ve a gun to their head but all the Australians emigrate as soon as humanly possible

Trump Repeats False Claim That Iranians Produce Oil From Bodies Like Bees

Spring means one thing: Sneezing the means of production

remove the names and byeline pics and you could have a new form of Captcha test - 'how many Chiles are in this picture?'

Bahahaha

All Things Must Ass

Look, I stand by this initial feeling I had upon finishing the movie.

my one bit of xenophobia is reserved for Wolverhampton taxi drivers www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

good to know

ME: (chastising myself) Careful. We can't just paint every billionaire as an evil NPC with no inner life. They're just people, and we need to understand that if we're ever going to improve society BILLIONAIRE: I'm an empty shell, man. No thoughts up here. I'm essentially a void made to suck up money

www.bbc.co.uk/news/article... wonderful news, I love these spooky lads

My white whale of hats

yeah I'll have the limited edition raptor eating my dick shorts

( 007 theme song playing )

‘Good Oscars, Good Oscars,’ Repeat Nominees In Forced Post-Ceremony Handshake Line

Quick look at tomorrow’s headlines

Absolutely fuck today’s NYT crossword but @bsky.app made it in

rarely share photography on here but I've spent the day going through archives

Weapons (2025)

tušāma ina urri iššira damiqtī arḫu innammaru inammira šamšī "Perhaps, at daybreak, good things will come to me A new moon will appear, my sun will shine." A couplet from Babylonian poem, Ludlul bēl nēmeqi, whose protagonist hopes for better days. A lengthy, beautiful, bizarre work of literature.