absolutely cannot get this image out of my head. i should be working on my book

HESGETH: our warfighters will no longer be prevented from fucking a cheeseburger in front of a vegan. we will no longer stop them from putting truck nuts on the A-10. we're inventing a tank that can roll coal. the only rations we will be issuing are for epic freaking bacon

be serious

when i got up there, i looked down upon the earth, and realized that i couldn't see any borders that would arrest transnational capital flows, or regulations that would slow carbon emissions

IMAGINE a Manhattan with no gay bookstores, it would be AGAINST NATURE and not in the gay way If you live in NYC, or care about gay bookstores, please consider helping @juliewbach.bsky.social and @hivemindbookstore.bsky.social keep @bgsqd.bsky.social running

denouncing streamers is youtubers' job

And I'll do it again

Both Bruce Springsteen and the Village People suck, real music is Linkin Park

well you better go catch it!!!

the plaintive morning cries of the cat who wakes up and realizes no one has paid any attention to her for hours

Everyone keeps saying "serving cunt" and it's making me feel really old. I still call them waiters.

the nice thing about this speech is it's a lot more "we are declaring victory and leaving before we lose harder" rather than "as I speak marines are landing in isfahan"

oh right they're not actually supposed to blow up when you launch them

okay i understand how this war is going to go now

in a sense I think losing the ability to trust reality as presented on a screen has done wonders for my screen time

what's the largest number of drinking vessels you can have within arm's reach before you need to do something about it. god I wish we had polls

at the very least people need more enrichment in their enclosures

does it still count if it's trump that puts the supreme court justices in jail

glad to see the republican party increasingly re-embracing nixonian norms like conspiratorial antisemitism

it gets a lot of love for being the only game besides wii sports to feel like it really *needed* the motion controls

you don't have to go [outside] but you can't stay [online]

my april fools bit is the same every year: continue not saying anything funny

just remembered that time u2 downloaded an album onto everyones phones against their will. in retrospect that was kind of our last warning about all this

In this time of higher energy prices, please consider car sharing…

"jelly roll world cup song" is a phrase thats gonna roll around in my head like a loose marble for at least a month

tarp! tarp! tarp! tarp!

getting kicked out of the speed racer rerelease screening because I got too disruptive when john goodman says "more like 'nonja'"

when the knids are vermicious >>>>

"...real sexy just like you asked"

just finished killing the whole cast and crew on the set of the new harry potter show. guide up on Friday #agent47style #imsim #speedrunning

Submitting a pull request

Before one single consequence is felt: turns out you can just do things

keep honking my hands are full of blood

[scrolling through timeline too fast] why are they making robot umpires watch harry potter

2031 History student: so was any of the Biden Saga canon? Or was it all just filler? Teacher: As a large language model, I am not permitted to answer that question.

they're serving up steak and lobster in the canteen tonight, which can only mean one thing: we're out of potable water

Ah, you think No Kings is going to accomplish anything? It's nothing compared to my approach of never being around other people for any reason

Platner apologized for posts which recently surfaced from a Letterboxd account active from 2017 to 2021. In a review for the French horror film Martyrs, Platner referred to it as his "comfort film." In a tearful apology video posted hours after the news broke, Platner spoke of his military service

Good to see Noam Chomsky still getting out at his age

Abbas Araghchi calling Pete late at night www.youtube.com/watch?v=94FO...

If kant smoked weed they'd be callin it the critique of pure resin

Paul Simon voice: This is the century of emails and attachments / This is the invite to the call

now admittedly I think if eminem had been hit by a bus right after the marshall mathers lp came out people would make this argument. there'd be murals of him all over the midwest

a human cannot survive without a second flesh-and-blood dumb bitch to tell us "exactlyyyyyyy"

guy who says "I'm sorry" when he sneezes

All we hear of the Imperium of Man is puritanical & punitive; is there nothing celebratory & joyous? Or is query naive?

Any other leftists want to challenge me on this notion that Tails/Knuckles slash fiction has problematic age gap dynamics? I'm quite hungry to humiliate you, and demonstrate to all the world's wary inhabitants what a worthless troll you are.

the thing is that nothing bad can happen. it can only good happen

anyone who thinks it’s ok to teach kids how to write ‘the cool S’ should go to jail