the mcrib is back

hey google chex mix ld50 how much

Stunned onlookers were overheard asking “Did we die? Is this Hell?"

guys .. it worked

i think the only reason luke skywalker was able to kill dark vader is because dark vader was super old and had arthritis, really bad arthritis

real "extreme couponing" means you strictly clip coupons for faustian bargains ($1.00 off cheetos, but you gotta square up with the torture man, etc.)

good news for your mom

The first Megadeth jiujitsu dogi

I light the black candles and use the Ouija board to summon the ghost of Babe Ruth, that I may inform him that a major storyline of the ALCS is that one of the guys has a huge ass.

<oderus urungus voice>

If so many people are out there protesting anyway, would it kill you to demand the immediate return of the McRib???

down? tired? had enough? try clapping back at your haters! no one has a single problem which can't be fixed by clapping back at one's haters! surely your life could be different if you clapped back at your haters!

unbound by the surly chains of mortality, now he aces freher than ever

banned from watching antiques roadshow at the dinner table til i can stop cussin at the people

"I was married, but I’m not married anymore. Women don't like the vehicle."

it's not FOR us

<helen mirren voice> kurt cobain would have loved online sports betting

louis comfort tiffany? i didn't even know tiffany was upset!!!

#birdbot

becoming radicalized (addicted to gambling) by short form content (sports betting commercials on all day on every source of media everywhere)

it's amazing that after twenty years, the term "sa goon" has gone from meaning "something awful forums poster" to something marginally less reprehensible!

why is a bee gee pitching

the time for saying "dingler" is over; now is the era of torkelson posting

why can't i get paid that much to say "dylan dingler" 500 times on tv???

i know I can just go to the pattie shop and it'll be "better," but I got a box of golden krust frozen patties just in case i ever didn't feel well and needed a pattie, and let me tell you: it was extremely clutch, and i am renewed

Interesting

there was a time, pre-1995 or 1996ish, where the whole entire Internet was just.. this. just every corner, every technology completely dominated by the most inscrutable, esoteric human beings, and i believe everyone who didn't get to experience that will never know how good we could have had it

Ah yes.. a deqade of Qud Hiya, boys! @unormal.bsky.social @jfg.land @lithovore.bsky.social

tom brady as a commentator makes perfect sense in the regard that he's got this massive amount of experience and knowledge but boy it sure reminds me of going to a game shop and being lectured by some guy who has a massive amount of knowledge and experience arguing about magic the gathering rules

football season, i can take it or leave it, but what i absolutely appreciate is the fact that every sunday, reliably, the rapture happens at 1pm and i can go out and do whatever i want without crowds or traffic

are people still paying to be cryogenically frozen? it feels like that's still a thing, but has there been literally any research into unfreezing them? feels like no? is anyone even trying, or is this just very obviously a one-sided transaction?

I think if you listen to a podcast with fake AI people saying AI generated words you are functionally dead, you are basically a phone to me at that point

It's wild that people still call posts on this site "skeets" (terrible, no one wants this) and not tweets. The other site doesn't even want the term, so screw it. Snatch it back. Bluesky can't call it that, but no one can stop us from replacing the awful, try-hard term with what posts are called.

STEVEN SEAGAL IS THE FINAL OPTION RIEDEL SOFTWARE PRODUCTIONS (Unreleased) SNES

doin thangs

biting right into an exclusive, online-only, pre-release caramel apple empanada: "hell yes"

reanimating jerry lewis to host a telethon to benefit the tragic victims of blueskyism

<the famous performing desert, sandy lennox, serenading the rain> "and i need you... like that lady needs that thing"

can someone please tell this guy that they're not number one? that's not even the number one finger

For the data center engineer in your life: This holiday season why not try a NetApp Advent Calendar? (Pull one drive out per day and see what happens)