Every Nora Ephron movie feels like being imprisoned in a nightmare world populated by grinning, self-obsessed body snatchers. I experience unrelenting terror and agony watching them.

My congresswoman just texted me asking if I noticed how expensive everything has become? I have been sending her FRED graphs for about an hour now, and you can do the same! With luck, they will stop meeting people where they’re at in favor of acceding to limited, reductionist macroeconomic truth.

No freedom was ever acquired without sacrifice

The thing more people need to understand about Catholics is that they’re always confessing. They’re confessing all the time! This is a big honking confession to some real crazy shit!

“And now the spell is broken; the boys shall hear a clap of thunder and no longer know how to play their instruments or sing. Their power over me is finally over,” VanFleet is reported to have said at the end.

Denvis…? DENVIS!!!!!!

Seeing an SAP ad on hockey boards is a very depressing experience. “Hey man enjoying a tense game 7? Sure you don’t wanna export some billings reports instead?”

I’m not even some huge Riley defender, but consistently encountering these weirdly facile and reductive cultural analyses on here is extremely instructive. Sort of like how you used to be able to unlock a lot of stuff about the conservatism of the time from the movie reviews in The Weekly Standard.

I just do think it would make more sense if we were all forced to be on the same site—graph guys waving away the amount of jobless advanced degree holders, furry mpreg artists correcting them, then the president posting an edit of himself taking a jacked alien into custody. That’s consensus reality.

Everyone knows Operation Overlord (US victory) and Operation Market Garden (British defeat) comprise two separate wars. This is like that, except that both operations have the same objective and both will end in US defeat.

Pick a Bond from the photos you already have on your phone

The Rings of Saturn 2666 Speedboat

No visiting fanbase talking shit to the home crowd going home looks as cool as Pistons fans look doing it.

The person reading this 😊

I want to thank Drake for distracting everyone from the fact that Porches dropped an inexplicably bad album today, too.

YOU - Did this person wrap… a Tesla? They enjoyed the game so much they got a custom wrap done for their car, that car being a Tesla. LOGIC - An affordable and widely available EV, brand aside. AUTHORITY - Now there’s someone who understands the game. You could stand to be a bit more like them.

Getting mogged by my Menswear son

Saw a parked late model Subaru Outback on a walk last night. Its throwback blue and gold “Water-Winter Wonderland” Michigan license plate read not “U PER” or “MGANDER” but “OREGON.” What could this mean?

My tummy huwts (basketball post)

“they pass it off by saying it’s just a “style” of pizza, but everyone knows real pizza is round, I just think more Michiganders should know what they’re dealing with here,” said an unaffiliated pizza strategist.

“My Ratline Nazi grandpa was an American success story and LGBTQ ally” is one of the most amazing facebook posts I’ve ever seen in my entire life. And to know this person joined forces with Lis Smith? There’s still beauty in the world, man.

*standing in the middle of a Starbucks butt naked except for a hawaiian shirt* Yeah, that’s my penis! You’re alllll looking at my penis! Now get over it. Get up from your seats and insist that these baristas sell me 457 cake pops immediately!

🎶Had to have high, high hopes for a living 🎶Shooting for the stars when I couldn't make a killing🎶

This is the oppo they hand on standby for that poll dropping today showing McMorrow face planting. I encourage you to read it for a good laugh.

I’ve been thinking about it a lot and so far this is my favorite Grassy Valley.

Many are calling it McMentum

Starting a war within a war to prosecute a war.

Was it coordinated harassment or just a bunch of people pointing out the evident hypocrisy of you banning accounts for pointing out your previous public behavior on your work account? You can ascribe intention and coordination to delineate from organic virality? Bluesky has the precog technology?

Hungary doesn’t have that much money to create sustained traffic in the right wing news ecosystem, people! If you have conservative parents you viscerally understand that the majority of this drop off is “I don’t want to think about this stuff anymore” self-protection. It’s primarily rat logic.

Owl_city_fireflies_5xspeed.mp3

This is how they’re going to make MAHA Uruk-hais that hunt down all kids with ADHD.

We’re living proof RFK Jr. is full of shit. 2001-2005 were the years of truly unholy food experimentation. And all you ate as a teen was stuff like this—whole meals that were just: an uncrustables, some Doritos 3Ds, and a philly snack bar. We are now the only generation that can use the computer.

Me when, me when I, when I, when me do, me when

This album rips, man. A lot going on but still feels like this project continues to refine what makes it suis generis. Angel being on Warp now is also pretty cool. This has been Prettyman’s music corner.

At a certain point one wonders if they’re actively trying to ensure they miss the most wide open dunk in human history come 2028.

Doodad acquired 🫡🇨🇳

Don’t worry about this kinda stuff, tho. You just think things are bad because of the contagion effects of being online (please don’t ask me to substantiate how this perfectly 1:1 causal relationship exists).

regardless:

im not voting for anybody that doesnt have the balls to throw this skin tag in a dungeon

Really appreciate that the analyst on this Pistons game is pulling double duty after an already long day making the rounds on CNBC, Bloomberg, et al, discussing the macroeconomic impacts of the ongoing fertilizer shortage.

"Same process of forgetting, of liquidation, of extermination, same annihilation of memories and of history, same inverse, implosive radiation, same absorption without an echo, same black hole as Auschwitz." - Simulacra and Simulation

"Folks, let me be clear, we need a strong republican party, to reinstate segregation, jim crow"

I’m digestive sun, cerebral rising personally.

SLOPPY THINKING GETS WORSE OVER TIME

The only thing I miss about X is that the top victims of poster’s madness over there have a much funnier and less introspective form of narcissism.

Look, there’s a growing segment for these. People don’t want all the hang ups and health concerns of drinking one 4.2% tall boy. They want to spend friday after work developing intense gastritis, throwing up, and panic spiraling about their personal finances and career while trying to pick a movie.

Man he’s really perfected having zero ideology. This is so finely tuned to read as a subtle endorsement of Mamdani-style left-liberal populism while still leaving room for liberalism’s continued strategic surrender on the “culture war.”

Baseball: Three strikes and you’re out! Bluesky: 4 strikes, one more strike than baseball haha! Your account currently has 6 strikes, however, out of 8. One joke about mods is 15 strikes, which carry over to Mastodon. We’re currently labeling you a “posting goblin,”which is bad. You’re now banned.