I went for a pint at The Harp, just off St Martin’s Lane and saw Andrew Ridgeley at the next table looking very suave and tanned. Good for him. #TOTP

#totp Caravan of love rules: If it's rocking, don't come knocking.

What a voice though. #TOTP

Neil is talking about the Christmas cheese selection #totp

*walks in room “The lady in reeeeeeeddd….” *exits sharpish #TOTP

As a twelve year old I thought the lyrics were “poppadum preach” and I thought that Madge was a lucky cow for living near an Indian restaurant. #TOTP

#totp Hope he feels the benefit outside 🤞🏼

Neil will grow into that coat. #TOTP

“This programme contains distressing scenes of Mick Hucknall” I do like the song though. #TOTP

The thought of Vyvyan wielding that cricket bat around Cliff is keeping me from booting the telly. #TOTP

It’s important to remember that most people are thicker than concrete custard. It’s why we all dread spending time with our racist families over Christmas (there’s *a lot* more racists than people who read books)

There's a word for selling political influence for cash... (sadly Reform aren't the first to do so) Via Private Eye

Xmas 1990 - I remember being moderately hungover at my Saturday job at WH Smith and having to spend hours pacing up and down the aisles doing “customer service” with Unchained Melody on loop. It got real old. #TOTP

Don’t get any ideas, Soldier Soldier #totp

It's vanishingly rare to take a Prince track and do a better version of it, but dammit Sinead, this is a masterpiece #TOTP

Semi regular reminder that Sinead O’Conner was so beautiful that the only words Bob Mortimer could find to say to her were “do you have any shops local to you?”. #TOTP

Ru Paul here: #TOTP

Kylie's dancers are cosplaying as the Volkswagen Polo Harlequin. #TotP

It’s going to be three minutes of this on here isn’t it? #TOTP

For years I thought that lyric was “Wobbly”, not “Quality”. #TOTP

“How many irritating ‘who-yeah’s do you want, Timmy? “Yes” #TOTP

Timmy Mallett switched on Colchester’s xmas lights in 1990. #TOTP

It’s a better song than Three Lions. #TOTP

#TOTP No. My grandma smelled of wee and hated everything.

Sixteen year old me loved this, I still do. #TOTP

Calm down! #TOTP

#TOTP Kim here being far better than I remember.

Hands up if you’re looking forward to two hours of 1998 #totp tonight.

#TOTP Xmas 1990. The nostalgic feels. I was sixteen and experiencing a hangover.

£5 says that he’ll find God before the year is out.

NEW | There are some familiar faces in the latest part of the year’s most calamitous chart… The 25 Worst Columns of 2025, Part Three: Clarkson vs the NHS, the phoney war on 'woke', and Boris' beard buffet brokenbottleboy.substack.com/p/the-25-wor...

Good morning wulferhampton have a magnificent Monday you manic monsters

Americans who criticise Starmer can enter the UK. Brits who criticise Trump probably can’t enter the US. Who has the free speech problem?

True story, Yazz has been unable to stand still since 1972. #TOTP

"Just follow The Master" #totp

Run the bath, I've got the toaster. #totp

No. #TOTP

Oh fuck off. #TOTP

"She can do the Kessell heroin run in 12 parsecs, kid" #totp

“There are no words to describe the situation…” That won’t stop you trying though. #TOTP

See, Slash scrubs up alright when he makes an effort. #totp

Chris Lowe here doing a stint at a nearby second hand car dealership after the show. #TOTP

They could’ve been called Epitome you know. #TOTP

“Celery, celery…” #totp

Fourteen year old me had a crush on Belinda Carlisle. I don’t think that I’ve ever told anyone that before. #TOTP

Chris' monitor: 10 PRINT "NEIL IS A TWAT" 20 GOTO 10 #totp