UAE now stands for “U Ain’t Eatin’ Dubai Chocolate!”

I want a Dubai chocolate boycott but I can’t decide whether to call it Don’tbuy chocolate or Dun’tbai chocolate

Ceci n'est pas une glaive

Curious what I’d think of it today. Saw it in college during my peak weirdo movie phase and found it quite boring.

Up to about 80 frames of animation now... I filmed the oscilloscope on one of my korg synths for some of the facial expressions.

Anyone you see IRL is a normie, everyone online is a disgusting freak

Or….they stand *on* the desk and say “Oh Captain, my Captain Falcon”

for those keeping track at home, the only energy drink I’ve found that won’t result in a days-long illness and mental breakdown is Starbucks Double Shot. now, you may be asking, why did you keep consuming energy drinks until you found this out? to which I would respond: shut the fuck up

I really want to see his family's wealth destroyed. Preferably while he's still alive but if it just impacts the kids that's okay too.

Commanders fans after Jayden Daniels makes game-winning touchdown throw against the Bears:

This is priming the pump for a much, much larger payout to Trump himself. I’m guessing $100m if not closer to $500m.

Doc: Where do you watch baseball in 2026? Marty: Netflix. Doc: Netflix?? The DVD delivery company?? ⚾️ #baseball #openingnight

“Remember what they took from you” and it’s just the blankie their mother took from them because it was starting to grow mold

Forget Whiskey Friday, it's another Taniel Tuesday!

Los Angeles to Cabo San Lucas

Liquefied Natural Gaslighting.

ive seen this game before. tomorrow american stocks will open below and flatten out over the day

It is being reported on the ground in Cuba that everyone on a ventilator at this hospital died overnight. As a Cuban, I'm devastated.

Happiness is a Warm Gun While My Guitar Gently Weeps

BlueSkyers pretending they’re happy that oil doesn’t go to $150 and Dow futures don’t drop 1200 points

Eddington 2 (Michael Bay, 2029)

Things are getting really sloppy man. I’m thinking this is going to be a weird week.

TSA line at Louis Armstrong airport. Nothing that a bunch of masked dudes in tac gear can’t fix.

bro, YES

I loved twitter when I joined circa Occupy Wall Street. It was fun, novel, and a decent way to organize. When I combined it with smartphone use a few years later, it became the shitty addictive little rage machine it has stayed since.

There are increasing signs of Trump’s desperation, flailing, and juicelessness everywhere. What is this supposed to be, a threat to Dems? Remember when he used to tweet four words or some Homeric descriptive nickname (shoutout @weisenthal.bsky.social) and change the whole game?

Great now the FBI is employing the faceless worker drone revolutionaries from that Atari Teenage Riot video 🙄

They should invent a prosecutor who isn’t without scruples

I’m not lazy but i HATE getting off the couch. But if those motion-detector lights go on the whole family shoots up to see what triggered it. @turok.bsky.social Normally foxes or boring ass deer. Sometimes a bunny. Once during the day we had a bear!

3-20 Soppressata Pizza

Best TV movie ever? I’m sure there’s some HBO movie I’m not thinking of.

Tfw you think you’re flight is at 11 AM tomorrow but you realize it actually lands at 11 and you in fact need to be at the airport at 4 AM

Hm making this post reminded me the conflict which leads to the nuclear war in Threads is an invasion of Iran

One day I’ll learn “indispensible” is in fact spelled with an “a”

The perfect ending to the new Holy Coves music video shoot in South Stack, Holyhead Just before the sun went down, and the weather turned for the worse. The weather was beautiful all day, until the storm came that night. How about we show you what we made? #holyhead #southstack #anglesey #wales

Who wants to bet this is a feint because he’s sending the 82nd Airborne and Marines in this weekend?

Bullying doesn’t work :(

Charlottesville, 2018

“foundational Americans” can we go one week without racists trying to come up with another dumb euphemism for white Christians? this is not fooling anyone!

Guess who has a twin brother and just voted to deport people merely charged with a crime? This guy!

I muted the word “Platner” way back but you all are relentless! I can’t mute “Graham” because I’d miss vital cracker updates.

I had an incredible experience on The Apps

WE MADE A TELEVISION SHOW. @victorlavalle.bsky.social & I adapted his incredible book The Devil in Silver into a new season of THE TERROR alongside Karyn Kusama & Ridley Scott. Dan Stevens will blow you away this. So will Judith Light. CCH Pounder. Stephen Root. The cast is stacked. May 7th. 😈 🚪🔒

I can see Hegseth sheepishly asking Trump like Connor Roy asking Logan for “a little 100 million”

*blows whistle* Penalty for vagueposting

@maustermuhle.bsky.social Whereabouts in Switzerland? Are you from there? I live in the US but have spent ~1/4 of my time in Zürich the last 9 years.

The self is an illusion, we are nothing, no one will remember any of us in 100 let alone a million years. If you use that realization to absolve your money-grubbing immoral life, *I* will *believe* you worthy of scorn from humans alive in our brief moment in time in this magical realm of existence.