just turned on a baseball game and saw that mitch mcconnell is batting seventh for the rockies. what the fuck are you doing man

Didn't think anyone could ever make Clay Travis look like a normal, reasonable guy.

A person who farts during a sermon is called a:

Fox being like "We're putting a dogshit product out there, it's just not fair that they're stealing our viewers!" is wildly on-brand.

It's here and it's beautiful.

WWE letting Sami Zayn finally win the world title just to give it to CM Punk 8 days later. Oh yeah, that's why I stopped watching that awful promotion.

i know nothing about how USA soccer works its youth developmental program but i'll say this: i've never watched a World Cup and not thought our roster featured too many guys who are there because their dad bought the school a scoreboard

Say what you will about the Belgians, at least we have universal healthcare.

Oh I'm all in on Belgium now.

We're more of a women's soccer school

Ted Cruz remains undefeated at connecting himself to sports Ls. The man cannot not miss

By law, every Waffle House now belongs to Belgium.

Michael Bradley ain't walking through that door

Imagine showing up like this to watch the USMNT get their teeth kicked in in embarrassing fashion

Since the US is about to get eliminated, does that mean I don't have to see any more dogshit Christian Pulisic commercials?

At least Malik Tillman is probably gonna get himself PAID.

Haven’t seen a Tillman this let down by his American teammates since…

We all know the real World Cup is next year

I'm starting to think MLS players might not be good enough to cut it?

Freese is horrible Ream sucks Dest is useless Pulisic is a no show The USMNT, folks! We’re truly back!

What in gods name was that?

Alex and Kelley look pissed lmao

Tim Ream has been brutal

Why is Pulisic taking corners?

Maybe 87 year old Tim Ream isn't the guy?

I WOULD DIE FOR MALIK TILLMAN

Why the fuck did this ref blow it dead for a non-head injury when we had the ball?

Truly awful defending

I would die for Malik Tillman

I fucking love Malik Tillman

WHO NEEDS 11!?!!

That should be a DOGSO red?

That is fucking awful

Just heard the Jelly Roll song on Telemundo and now I need to hear @surber.bsky.social do Spanish language Jelly Roll

I'm sorry but why does Arizona iced tea have Soccer kits and why do they go so hard?

What a fucking match

Standing glove save is CRAZY. Straight up Mutumbo'd that.

No way

NO FUCKING WAY HAKIMI

I... I think this raccoon wants to fuck me?

Immediately need @jasonkirk.fyi 's thoughts on the new CRJ banger

OH NO

Lmaoooooooo what a way to lose

Squarest kick to the nuts I’ve seen in a while

That looked like it hurt

You can say a lot of things about Sebastian Berhalter, but one thing you better say is that man strikes a ball clean as hell. Dead ball, from the run of play, for an assist or goal, he's going to hit it clean.

Pepi has been completely non-existent tonight

Bad night for the Timothy Weah defenders (me)