Quote with 5 jobs you’ve had: 1) University tech support 2) Webmaster for a Web 1.0 magazine 3) Candy importer and retailer (brought candy back from Egypt when I visited my grandparents and sold it at my middle school) 4) Tutor 5) Developer of electronic trading algorithms

If I was a teenager, I’d take a date to the Melania movie. You could do whatever you wanted there

www.maptap.gg January 28 99🎯 99🎯 100🎯 99🎯 91👑 Final score: 968

And if you lose the NFL, as a linear broadcast network, millions of Americans will never even know that Paramount Plus exists or that you can stream Yellowstone 5 or FBI: Young Sheldon on it. You’re just the CW.

Imagine giving a fan of backpack rap total creative control over BET in the 00s and you get an idea of what’s happening here.

Nazis are upset that most Nazis in their bar don’t support cold blooded murder by agents of the state

Imagine going MAGA in 2025 and ending up supporting all this. This is like deciding to be a Raiders fan the year after they played Tampa Bay in the Super Bowl

Giants fans were tortured when Saquon won a Super Bowl, Jets fans will be tortured if Darnold wins the Super Bowl. What’s next, Pete Alonso winning a Weold Series with Baltimore?

Jake Bobo Jake Bobo Jake Goddamn Bobo

This is the single funniest excuse he could have come up with for not wanting to be booed in public

I joke that WaPo has become Temu NR. The closing to this editorial seals it, “The overreach of the past year could consume his presidency and lead to more tragedy. If Trump won’t change course on his own, can Republicans in Congress save him from himself?” That’s a line you’d see in a partisan rag

cbs superimposing yard lines on the screen instead of making us guess

The only good thing about the Nazi site is watching all the MAGA chuds going on tilt as they realize it’s all slipping away. We’re going to win. Let’s avoid circular firing squad behavior and land the plane. This is for Renee Good and Alex Pretti

Woo boy, if Republicans are starting to get shaky now, things are going to get hilarious once the primaries are over

I feel like this was written just to bait @dandrezner.bsky.social

Ok, this is pretty niche for those of us on Bluesky that speak Arabic. But the Arabic on Trump’s “Board of Peace” is amazingly terrible. It looks like it was written left-to-right (aka backwards) and is formatted incorrectly. Someone 4 weeks into intro Arabic would be able to catch this basic shit

I used to manage wine programs for movie theaters and I am in the extremely unique position to say with professional certainty that the answer here is a crisp Albariño.

Read this conversation between @jamellebouie.net and Douthat and came away with even more respect for Jamelle than I had before. Ross is such a weasely little shit here and it must have taken quite a bit of restraint to not call him out with both barrels.

The head of product at Twitter has not yet learned how to chew

This time with alt text, here is Fernando Mendoza's "Here's What I Learned From Winning a National Championship" LinkedIn post. (Which enough of my LinkedIn mutuals had liked within 30min that it showed up naturally in my feed)

We may look back at the “kidnapped on a bus” story as the Battle of Stalingrad in the war between Twitter and Bluesky

I just saw an ad for Amazon medical about a woman with a UTI on a flight and it is definitely the most “what the fuck?” Ad I’ve seen from a major company

Fernando Mendoza post game F-Bomb showing he’s ready for Raiders Nation

Congrats to coach Cignetti

Congratulations to the Hoosiers. You deserve this fucking thing and you are the undisputed champs!

The Carson Beck pick in a big spot

I just woke up from a nap and somehow while I was asleep, everyone on the bus has figured out we are not going to the right place

If this happens I’m rolling down to the Egyptian consulate and renewing my passport for the first time since the HW Bush administration

Cool cool cool. I’m sure we don’t have anything to worry about with a far right German party having a nuke

I scared my cat yelling after that pass and I’m not a Bears fan

What the fuck was that camera work on that kick?

Deandre Swift is a great RB, as long as he’s not your load bearing RB

Who among us hasn’t been tempted to grab a Boutte

CJ Stroud is champagne Mac Jones

I think the new strategy for Stroud should be to try to throw it to the Pats. He might accidentally get to one of his receivers

It’s too early in the day for a game to be this drunk

Wow. Thanks for burning you credibility and selling your soul to get RFK across the line Senator Cassidy. I hope when you return to private life everyone treats you like the piece of shit that you are

They keep talking about the altitude. Why don’t teams spend the whole week before a playoff game in Denver?

Resisting the urge to do something very dumb

timeline cleanser www.youtube.com/watch?v=I5XR...

Tired: DC is Hollywood for ugly people Wire: DC is podcasting for uninteresting people I'm sick and tired of our political leadership acting like mediocre edge lords. Why TF is a potential candidate for an ambassadorship making this jokes. His literal job is being diplomatic

This is uncanny

Woke 2 is going great

I DM'd him on Facebook to tell him his name had been released, and he may want to private his socials. His response was to change his PFP to this. Absolute king shit, gives zero fucks

Critical update

But but but I thought only banana republics prosecute former leaders

The good news is that MVS is carrying the Steelers. The bad news is that MVS is carrying the Steelers

Time to go long Home Depot and contractors that are going to have to fix this nonsense