Play the B side you cowards! #totp

How I'm turning up to the Bluesky Christmas party.

My mind every Christmas Eve: Don't drink too much. You have to be up early to open presents with the kids and be on good form, full of festive cheer for the rest of the day spent with your parents and in-laws. Also my mind every Christmas Eve: Fuck it.

Christmas giveaway time! I've got a 2026 Calendar in need of a good home. For a chance to win it just click Follow/Like/Retweet (and if you can spare a couple of quid a month & want to encourage me, sign up to my Patreon.com/happytoast - but that bit's not necessary to win)

Papa Smurf has double dropped, again #totp

It's time to wrap the presents. Only one piece of background tele will do. #totp

#WhatWeWereWatching Every syllable requires a hand gesture, apparently