Maybe I'm completely out of it, but I had absolutely no idea that there was a moon mission blasting off today until like 11:00 this morning. Honestly thought it was an April Fools thing.

Asked about how long the Blue Jays are going to wear their retro hat on Reddit and have been downvoted into oblivion. Hot take: the two different logos on the cap and uniform look stupid.

The Rockies are exacting their revenge for the blow out series last year. Or something.

Wordle 1,744 2/6 ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 😎

No perfect view out of a hotel window exists—

Never in doubt Connections Puzzle #1004 🟨🟪🟩🟦 🟪🟪🟪🟪 🟩🟩🟨🟩 🟩🟨🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟨🟨🟨🟨 🟦🟦🟦🟦

Looking forward to the when the kids eat all of the lunches I make for them instead of this at the end of each day.

Do chip shops near nuclear reactors sell fission chips

Cool cool cool cool the slush is gonna freeze into icy ruts again 🥴

DOG AT THE OLYMPICS FULL COMPETITION HIGHLIGHTS

The day when I don’t see one of those stupid AI epoxy bedroom floors over rocks and diamonds and stuff videos on my social feed can’t come soon enough.

Connections Puzzle #927 🟪🟪🟪🟪 🟨🟨🟨🟦 🟩🟦🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟦🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟦🟨🟨🟦 Connections can be pull-your-hair-out frustrating sometimes.

I just opened the Amazon app and typed the Amazon url in the search bar if you’re wondering where my brain is currently.

Here’s a video from about two and a half years ago of a fox finding some food—a burrito perhaps?—and trotting off with it like The Littlest Hobo.

I’m convinced those who designed the seating areas at swim complexes have never been to a swim meet.

Absolute galaxy brain drivers.

Looking for a new car for the first time in 10 years and woah I had no idea how quickly sales people text & call & email like three and a half seconds after you fill out an internet form.

My Instagram account was copied today.

I was raised on these streets.

Am I surprised it isn’t a snow? Very yes. As a self-employed person whose very busy day would be upended by an unplanned day at home for the kids, am I upset? Very no.

For those without kids, this what tonight sounds like: Will it be a snow today tomorrow? Will it be a snow today tomorrow? Will it be a snow today tomorrow? Will it be a snow today tomorrow? Will it be a snow today tomorrow? Will it be a snow today tomorrow? Will it be a snow today tomorrow? Will i

Went to the Costco food court with one of the kids and actually got a seat. It’s a Festivus miracle.

Took Kid B to the dentist and they did an x-ray so I saw all the adult teeth yet to come up buried in his face and I can say with certainty that it was a weird and an unnerving image.

Yeah, I totally want to see a real estate agent’s giant head printed on the side of a passing train.

i think if you want to have those disgusting LED headlights on your car, you should have to do a test where they blast you point blank with your own headlights and then you have 15 seconds to successfully complete some sort of vision-based task, and if you can't do it they push your car off a cliff

“Home Alone” hit theaters 35 years ago today.

Not that I’m surprised or anything, but the music at Real Canadian Superstore makes it feel like December 23 or something.

I am officially putting a moratorium on guys replying to me that "it's called SkyDome" It's been twenty years. It's been Rogers Centre for longer than it was ever SkyDome. We all know what it used to be called. We GET it.

I love this.

Barger can _totally_ make up for last night. #WorldSeries

Sacrifice fly to end the #WorldSeries, who says no?

Whatever happens in this game, at least there wasn’t a goddamn Jonas Brothers show in the middle of it. #WorldSeries

Holy fucking double play #WorldSeries

FUCK YES #WorldSeries

baseball fights are sooooo funny because they just mill around when it COULD be way more violent, like sir you have a bat in your hand

When John Schneider walked past Max Scherzer after Game 6, the manager thought "it looked like he was ready to kill somebody."

When my kids ask where all their Halloween candy went.

Just wanna pour my heart out a bit about how this Blue Jays team was built on guys consistently getting taken down a peg, forced into uncomfortable circumstances, and coming out the other side.

🤞

That was close-ish.

Still due.

solve this puzzle dork _AAAAA _O_GERS LOSE

This four game Dodgers sweep is a weird one because it's not that at all. #WorldSeries

I’ve never seen an intentional balk until just now. #WorldSeries

Dodgers need the elusive 5-run home run to win. #WorldSeries

Giménez is due for a dinger. #WorldSeries