Lowkey had it up to here lowkey

cinnamon is deadass wood

Happy new year. The time just changed here

(gay Eminem) man I wish i lived on 7 mile road instead........

Hermit Smallville and his seminal work,,, Mopey Dick

[Normal Rockwall church pew man meme] 7 miles is too long for a penis

Doctor [at my annual check-up]: And your dick. It's still 7 miles long? Me: Uhhm. It's been feeling a little shorter. But yeah pretty much. Doctor: Uh-huh. Well that's still not normal.

my vape is giving me havana syndrome

If my dick was 7 miles long. That would not be tight

Babe... babe... babe...

Do you ride for riding the highway west or not really

Do you fear danger or not really

Danger is something we fear

Good morning

BIG CHUNGUS | Official Main Theme

Big Chungus is just one of a number of Chungus subspecies

3-nap day

I straight up cannae bro

Lifehack: if you eat the scrambled eggs on toast I couldn't finish three hours ago, they are bad

Lifehack: if you eat all your food off aluminum foil you never have to do the dishes

Reading opinions and saying ayup ayup ayupppppp

When you see some shit you agree with it's like ayyyyuuuuuuuuppppppppppppp

Tired in the style of a koala bear

You guys who follow this account but not the main are funny

Would you rather do some amazing shit or have to do some terrible crap no one likes

Mug of room temperature coffee

Towel

Shoe

My new tweet format is just tweeting stuff I see

I need to yon relly big

I need to shneese

I need to borp

Happy new year. The time just changed here

Whyumiso fuckeng tired lately

Saving Private Crabman

if i had a wife id snuggle up next to her

You got a sponge bob I want a patrick to anywhere

We need to shut this website down until we figure out exactly how many times Crab Man took the Lolita Express to Little Saint James

Think I'm pretty much out of things to say

Good morning everyone

Spongebobs roasting on an open fire

Sponge it bob, sponge it bob, sponge it bob

Oatmeal Creme Pies got me feeling like the white Mike Wazowski

With my first wish I ask the genie to give me the wingspan of a gibbon. My second wish I ask for the fur of a gibbon. My third and final wish I ask to be shrunk to the size of a gibbon

Life might be better if we returned to the trees. If we got a little arboreal on their asses

Trying to imagine a 5th-generation Californian and my head explodes

Who up thinking about the wonders of the natural world

tweeting is a sisyphean task

bad day to be one of my haters