Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work. “Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck…..whew”

Starting an OnlyFans and putting various ag equipment on my wishlist

in a text string after the shooting, a fellow agent told Exum he's a "legend" "Beers on me"

This textbox is a message and part of a system of messages. Java is installed on over three billion devices. Java is found everywhere, even in your car. We thought we were a powerful culture.

The late morning sun glistening on The Pile

Had a startling dream this morning that Aella was on bluesky

I ordered a bunch of impressionist prints for my house but putting the Norman Rockwell free speech guy over my fireplace would have been pretty funny

*shooting a bunch of Great Stuff foam into your drafts* that oughta seal em right up

Belgian 75

ai dot com slash turd

I plan to have surgery or a procedure

"our product will literally murder you" great sell

death to all ISPs

my favorite pokemon is Lapras, as I have made clear in the past

San Juan Lineman

what the fuck, my normally very reliable internet just died for a minute!!

they should have to play the rest of the game in the sugar cane maze

What's the most you ever lost on a coin toss? Anton Chigurh here for FanDuel,

holy fuck

everyone involved with that Dunkin ad should be flayed

I'll watch a Ryan Gosling Project Hail Mary sure

This is my cue to evangelize by far the funniest Andor meme yet made youtu.be/Mt5z4IkD-qE?...

trying to remember the currency of brazil. the brazilian peso..no. the brazilian lira....no. the brazilian dollar...maybe...

jomny sun on rogan 😔

what if I fell off the toilet and hit my head and started posting like jomny sun

Breaking: Tragedy at the Winter Olympics

☠️🌏

@techconnectify.bsky.social I saw the socks in the wild today in my small town (pop. ~4000)

What if it, what if it was, what about if it was, what if it was the ozympics. The winter ozympics. What if that’s what it was

Once again, it turns out “fully autonomous” means “a guy in the Philippines.”

Highlighting the speaker who stood in front of the Surprise mayor and told him to consider what the Mayor of Ohrdruf must’ve thought before he died by suicide: “He might have thought ‘how is this my fault I had no jurisdiction over this’ maybe he said ‘this site was not subject to local zoning.’”

small brown recluse on the wall in the basement escaped my attempts to kill it

I can always spell bureaucracy right on the third or fourth try

My people have waited thousands of years for Viva Piñata 3. We are prepared to wait for thousands more

"Ill from drink and suffering from smoker's cough,"

The Ultimate Bundle

It’s really cool how true crime etc has cooked everyone’s brain

Did we ever figure out Crab Man’s actual birthday

I can only assume Jelly Roll is a stand up comedian who weighs at least five hundred pounds

The first fully nude Grammys is within our reach

I’ll cure you of your flatulence

Nightmare project

KOKO THE GORILLA SERVING INDICTMENT TO HARVARD EPSTEIN ASSOCIATE: Felony professor.

Adrenochrome…real?!

From: [email protected] To: [email protected] Date: 1554 Second Age Subject: Re: Master Ring (Forged in secret)??? lmfao u totally shoulkd

Musk:Lowtax::???:Schmorky