power word: sleepy

‘death to the nonbelievers’ is supposed to be an inner work thing

(pneumatic hiss)

from sea to chinese sea

five minutes til i can put my work brain on the clothesline to air out for ten days

if i decided who to cheer for in the world cup based on how kind their government is to me i would be sitting on my hands with the tv off

it is very obvious to me when someone taking a front-facing cam video is looking at themselves on the screen and not the camera and i judge them for it

if you find yourself caught between two extremes the answer is most likely somewhere in the middle

synthesis reached: based on symptoms i do undeniably have severe bdd, but that does not mean i am secretly a beautiful princess

the problem is that when nothing means anything it also means everything

it’s funny how those ppl climbed the esb yesterday and all i saw on here was ppl either laughing at or shitting on it and now a bunch of big brands are using the flag photo as a meme format and then we’ll all forget about it and nothing means anything anymore

asking the grocery store worker if they have pregnancy discounts

if you think someone’s looking at you in a work video call you can do a more abrupt movement like taking a sip of a drink and they’ll usually copy the behavior if they are

i’m pregnant

guys check this out

i mean the dao that can be spoken is not the eternal dao but sure go off

setting my google maps units of measurement to hops skips and jumps

that’s not what words mean but ok

started watching digimon beatbreak and i’ve liked this lil doofus a lot more than i expected to

before transition when i was bein shaggy mullet non-biney wit it a lady at a pharmacy told me i looked like john denver and that’s always the first thing i think about when i hear country roads

potentially playing belgium without balogun… if not cooked tonight, cooked on monday

new emotion dropped

that’s heart eyes to my ears bro

no heart eyes emoji for the nose… typical

hot styrofoam 😍

my spoons have been compromised

the entire state building

i’m golden baby

i’m going to redo my office (which is also sorta my cats’ room) when i’m off next week and i’ve been struck by inspiration tonight

i was trying to do a mashup of snakeroot and crudité but all the word options look weird. best when spoken

Like and share to end all stupid bull shit

word on the street is we are going inside to play games and mom is gonna order pizza

if all your hopes hinge on getting everyone in the world to read a book you are in big trouble

if you ever see my post on an algorithmic feed it is scared and you need to walk it home or call someone

✋stop

blocked someone for being annoying but immediately unblocked bc i knew their reply taken out of context on the ‘blocked for this post’ account would allow a point-of-view i’m against to have a great time making fun of it

walt weiss looks like he’d manage the hell out of a jiffy lube

quirple

if someone replies to me telling me cheese is an animal product when it’s pretty clear what i meant i’m going to peel them in a spiral starting from their pinky finger

most commercials make me angry and the reason is usually a pretty even split between ‘this is manipulative’ and ‘this is poorly done’

imagining a world without the meat industry and the oil/auto industry and getting blinded by the light of utopia

it’s so frustrating to not be a picky eater as a vegetarian. i see a menu and i’m like ‘i would eat all of this if you just wouldn’t put meat in it’

i want pasta house and no one understands

ta-ra-ra boom-de-ay bro

knock on synthetic wood particle board

guys i wish we were the budweiser frogs

i love giving people good news i wish my job was giving people good news

you can’t be directly flirty with snakeroot or you’ll spook him

prabble bungo. zellef nandi mo shooble