flip side: I'm married now and 2 new humans exist because a cat, who "never does that," got on my lap

If you win the Masters back to back you should get green pants

solid clearance items at Kroger today. got some pineapple ollipop with spongebob on the can, a thing of the murray's buratta for like 70% off, and a family-size pan of spaghetti and meatballs from the deli for 50% off. Monday dinner solved, simply cannot stop winning

oh hey that one goofball who quoted me on two separate occasions to call me some variety of "weird little freak" finally blocked me, that's cool

force feedback. I drive the race car over the rumble strips, the wheel shakes a little. chef's kiss every time

I don't get called a Nazi often but when it happens it's always here and it's always the same crowd

more like Viktor, You're Gone

this cursed as hell clearance sale gas TWO Del Amitri CDs that don't have that one song on them

If JD Vance terminated Orban does that make him a good terminator

no one is doing it like jd vance, a loser across three continents in a single weekend

tell you what rules is how Kid 1's they/them pin works on just about everybody

Everybody stop shooting guns at the oceanfront. Stop it!

Hey everyone, Joad here is an anti-Palestinian racist who has decided his whole thing is making sure the kids starve harder.

I just failed whatever test of maturity this is

does UFC still do the "pa-pow!" thing from Virtuosity

this is a fun chaser to a bunch of strangers accusing me of being obsessed with someone because of one thread

this is so much fucking weirder than anything I've posted tonight lmao

5-digit-following accounts with absolutely no juice really coming out of the woodwork tonight

No, I’m defending someone who has worked tirelessly to help as many people as she can who are being slaughtered in a genocide. And you responded to he by saying she’s getting “romance scammed.” That’s some weird ass misogyny.

are you "owning" me here by saying you're the Goatse man? in defense of Molly Shah, who doesn't give a fuck about you? is that what you're doing here?

my head's in better shape than yours, dicknuts

I think this guy might be romance scamming you.

Fixed the inverted pedal axis problem! Let's go!!

Honorable mention goes to Michelle Wolf for calling Sarah Huckabee Sanders a liar to her face and the entire legacy media pretending they heard her call her fat.

I bet if Harry Dean Stanton were to rank the movies he was in Down Periscope would be way up there

CDs are elite because they're never gonna put this bad boy on streaming

something I've come to notice and worry about is the number of people out there who basically only listen to people talking. no music at all. they never just drive with music playing, or listen to music while working. it's just bawk bawk bawk bawk squarespace bawk

finally watching Sinners and it opened with Michael B. Jordan looking into the camera and ordering "whoever is out there" to destroy their copy of OBAA?

if it's legal for some church outfit to knock on my door and get my dog barking in the morning it should be legal for me to have a bucket of water set up to fall on them if I press a button

took me way too long to just order these for the kids

we didn't...I don't think we did this?

Sasse's signature legislation was the "Born-Alive Abortion Survivors Protection Act," a nonsense bill designed to gratify a conservative conspiracy theory. He wasted his whole life on culture war lying.

squirt them word turds while you can, Ben's Assy

[youth pastor voice] I'm not "dodging" the question I just want to know why it's so important to you "how" I met my wife

is california gonna spend Woke 2 with a Republican Governor

add him

Contrary to public perception a huge % of pregnant teenagers in the 1990s were impregnated by adult men. The younger they were, the larger the average age gap between mother and father was. Fixing teen pregnancy was in part a clampdown on statutory rape. That's what conservatives want to reverse.

if I were Homelander I would simply kill Hughie

homelander seems like kind of a bad guy now, I don't think I like that

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Pitt. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Robby's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his p

does anyone know if there's a straightforward policy solution to low birthrates whose only real obstacle is a belief in ethnostates?

they had the fancy natural casing hot dogs on clearance at Kroger. We're eating good, boys

Women are gathering degrees like they're the infinity stones and men are asking chatgpt which gas gets you highest

their version of the legend of billie jean seems way better

I didn't realize how gray

folks you gotta take the kid to the grocery store, it's elite quality time

this is how I found out she was in on all that

It's so cool that I have to run an entire background thing just to make a button on my mouse not take me to the task switcher

No I think it would work if I did it.