I love it when Big Red goes. #gbr

The vascular issue is of course that he has congestive heart failure.

Untoasted everything, scallion cream cheese. Anything more fancy than that is putting on airs.

It is cool that I can watch my retirement fund lose thousands of dollars in real time because an old man with dementia got mad on his phone.

"Only rich people take the bus," is something that would get cut from a sketch because it doesn't sound like something even the the world's worst politician would say

It's Cam Skattebo time.

This test, which he said was NOT THE EASIEST, is literally them asking you to point to a picture of a Giraffe and know where you are.

RFK Jr met some anti-circumcision activists and was like, "these dudes are autistic as hell!"

The guys negotiating the future of Gaza in good faith are for sure the guys using Palestinian as a hilarious insult.

He's missing for days at a time. He's talking non-stop about getting into heaven. And now this? Dude could not be closer to death.

They are showing him AI videos, right?

I'm trying to get into Baseball and just finished the first season. Not sure I get the hype. Will I be lost if I skip ahead 140 seasons or so?

Also available

The Kirk Curse!!!

Norfolk. Papillion. Think of the dumbest way you could pronounce either and guess what? Even dumber.

It is so stark that Zohran is actually out there doing this while Cuomo is paying someone to create AI slop that makes it look like he did this.

Yes, but not in a long time. Used to use facebook to organize incredibly fun parties, keep in touch with people, catch up with old friends, but it just isnt' good at any of those things anymore. It only makes me angry or sad. It doesn't even effectively promote my work anymore.

I'm sorry but what are these people doing to dogs in their free time?

Where is "the lie" 🤣

If the Yankees get swept, it will be 100% because of this. Funniest baseball curse ever.

Didn't they just do a big speech about how it was gonna be nothing but jacked hunks from here on out?

Your english teacher and gym teacher are getting married and here's a song about his giant hog.

Remember how every rich guy was a pedophile and we all just had to be cool with it?

Boomers all bought and restored versions of the car they drove in high school, like Camaros or Corvettes, which means someday, I'm 100% going to restore a 1994 Plymouth Grand Voyager to all its glory.

It makes us look so weak that every single leader knows all they have to do to get what they want is tell one weird old guy that he's a big strong boy. Can't imagine that's how we drew this up 250 years ago.

What's the DEAL with your homes being underwater?

If a college student said this, they'd send him to South Sudan.

Its literally the "are we the baddies" pin...

Not to sound like some kind of comedy snob but after Riyadh, I'm so glad my comedy heroes weren't normie big name comics. So much good will and respect burned up in one weekend. Niel Hamburger would never do this to me.

I love how normal everyone is now

The CNN headlines today were desperate to spin it, but it is really hard to blame it on the party that is completely out of power in every branch.

It is crazy how pathetic Chappelle has become, all because someone was like, "hey don't be so shitty to trans people."

This is not strength. This is the weakest, scaredest shit I have ever seen in my life. The walls are closing in and these dudes are freaking the fuck out.

"I was saying boo-urns" pops in my head literally any time anyone boos anything.

In a city of world-class artists and production crew hunting for the next gig, Andrew Cuomo made a TV ad the same way he wrote his housing policy: with AI. Then again, maybe a fake Cuomo is better than the real one?

Oh well if Newt Gingrich says so....

Crazy thing about this guy is at one point, early in his career, he was funny. Then he decided he'd rather be fucking annoying and weird.

If this guy was playing a character, I'd follow him around the country like he was the Grateful Dead. Absolutely perfect "crypto billionaire" costume.

Chuck Schumer, in an hour from now: The president plans to flood the streets with military personnel to oppress innocent people, but what he should be flooding the streets with is tax credits for the middle class!

Okay so it is bad bad.

OPD continues to do OPD stuff.

What reason would conservatives have to be against Bad Bunny (an insanely popular musician) other than, well, the obvious one? They're doing all but saying it at this point.

Get their asses, David, my close personal friend who I sometimes walk by on my way to the Branded mic: officialdavidcross.com/blogs/press/...

In high school, I went to something called a Surge Party and it was a kegger, down to the solo cups and drinking games, but with Surge. It feels like a false memory but I'm pretty sure it happened.

What reason would conservatives have to be against Bad Bunny (an insanely popular musician) other than, well, the obvious one? They're doing all but saying it at this point.

We support both right wing and right wing politics.

Pretty pathetic stuff sir!

it is the performance of authoritarianism because they do not have the capacity to maintain authoritarian control

I was just about to start my first shift as a waiter at his table of success. Anyone know what I should do?

Jeffries should get up there and use his entire hour set to roast the royal family. If truly he's a free speech machine, there is zero risk and a ton to gain. What is the worst that happens, Jim? Does it rhyme with Scone Slaw?