John is gonna lose his shit when he finds out what acting is.

My Oscar ballot! I voted as if I were an Academy member, not to try and be right. I saw all the major award films and all but 4 of the films total. If you're mad about me voting for Timmy C, please remember ALL actors are annoying dweebs. Which pick made you most mad? Let me have it.

A few weeks ago, I was piss drunk at a bar and the bartender had put out a QR code to order Girl Scout cookies from her daughter. I forgot about it until today when several boxes of Tagalongs and Thin Mints showed up at my door. I can never stop drinking because Drunk Bob is a genius.

U.S. Suffers Additional Casualties In War It Won Last Week

Obviously planted by Vance so he can distance himself from this if it blows up in their faces (it is going to do that). Vance's one defining trait is he thinks he's slick but he isn't.

The stages of doing anything creative for long enough: 1. I'm not good enough yet. 2. People who aren't very good are making it, so I must be good enough, but not lucky. 3. I am not good or lucky. At 3 you either flame out or keep doing it forever because you enjoy it. True freedom.

He's working on Frieza rules. He's more powerful now and it isn't even his final form.

And released just in time for an FBI that is learning arm bars from the UFC instead of investigating crimes. Couldn't have worked out neater for him and I wish him the best.

Sold his soul for $1500. More like the Broke Ginger.

Do you get awarded the 8-Ball jacket for being the scariest guy in the subway car, or does the jacket just make you act like that?

Laker Fans Furious As Bam Adebayo Dies In Even Worse Helicopter Crash

Kash Patel is having UFC fighters help train the FBI, so the FBI is about to be really good at beating the shit out of their girlfriends and dropping dead in their 30s.

Kash Patel is having UFC fighters help train the FBI, so the FBI is about to be really good at beating the shit out of their girlfriends and dropping dead in their 30s.

Experiencing a dangerous but thrilling frisson of near-gnostic transgression as I drawl the r-slur into a podcast mic.

One of the largest joint military installations on earth is right at the Strait of Bab-el-Mandeb for a reason. This is either fake or some really silly bluster. Neither side of this conflict is going to act in good faith so you can mostly ignore shit like this. It's "oops, all lying dipshits."

They have so far hit 3 ships TODAY. Starting to wonder if these people might be stupid.

Good news for the Colts is that never in NFL history has a QB who has been average his whole career had one really good season and then reverted back to being average the very next after getting overpaid. It has never happened and I definitely can't think of a dozen examples off the top of my head.

In Omaha, Nebraska, on 311 Day, all crime is legal.

What a phony. Everyone knows a diet of raw meat and ferments will fix that up in no time.

Once again, I just don't think your spouse dying should be far and away the best thing to ever happen to you. Seems weird!

This lays bare who he is. Playing sports is the least consequential of the trans issues as far as impact but is the highest visibility due to loud annoying people. He will sell out anyone if right wing freaks are loud enough. He believes in nothing other than his own pursuit of power.

So we went from a guy who hates America to a guy who hates America and we killed his dad.

"You want my fuck-palace-in-the-sky? Come and take it."

Yakko Wacko and Dot are finally free.

Alright BlueSky, I just beat Final Fantasy XVI. Beautiful game that would not have gotten the hate if it was called anything else. What should my next game be? 1. Resident Evil Requiem 2. Doom Dark Ages 3. FF Tactics: Ivalice Chronicles 4. Some twee indie horseshit

Conservative nostalgia is fully tied up in just wanting to be a little baby again with no problems or responsibilities.

We are at war. The economy is collapsing before our eyes. Peepaw wants to talk about football.

Just watched a totally normal young guy realize he missed his stop, jump up, and try to pry open the doors on a moving subway train with his bare hands. I am once again asking, is every really fucking stupid now?

It's happening again...

LEWANDOWSKI: If this is your first flight on Fuck Plane...you have to fuck. [MARKWAYNE nods.]

I'm worried when Kristi Noem finds out she's been fired she's going to become America's first obedience school shooter.

noem's dog looking down from heaven

Markwayne Mullin doesn't realize it yet, but he also has to fuck Corey Lewandowski now.

You know that the local animal shelters in DC gonna hate to see Kristi coming around to let off some steam.

I'm just a small government conservative and yes, I want the feds to tell me who I have dinner with.

There is no greater aging millennial man indicator than a beer stein that is primarily used as a big water glass.

A lot of people say AI isn't very good for the world and its outputs are routinely unreliable, but these haters fail to see how it's revolutionizing how we incinerate schoolchildren.

Not a no!

Lots of cool stuff happening lately.

It is 1972. It is 2003. It is 1991. It is 2026. We exist in all times all at once.

About to radicalize such a strange cross section of people.

ian miles cheong has passed away. while sheltering in a dubai mall, he became entangled in the teeth of an escalator, which shucked him like an ear of corn.

It's gonna be 90 minutes of The One Conservative Joke.

Me, a fucking idiot: Oh, it might be fun to see Michael Shannon's REM cover band. What a silly way to spend a Saturday night. Ticket scalpers: fuck you, you stupid fucking rube. Give me your whole wallet. I hate you.

This is funny because you know this snake would have turned on a dime the second the bombs started dropping. He'd be the biggest cheerleader for this shit, but he got smoked so he can't. Too bad.

You can tell this was written by a bunch of mad dudes in their 50s because the first big joke in the trailer is a tired ass pronoun joke that has been done at every open mic on earth at least 50,000 times.

The man is rotting in front of our eyes.

Literally doing Iraq war shit beat for beat but without the months long consent manufacturing is going to go so fucking badly for them. I really don't think they understand.

Posting a photo of your crazy night out but there isn't a friend in sight, only staff, is maybe the most pathetic thing I've ever seen.