Took the same airport shuttle bus to the hire car centre as John Craven.

Top Adrian Chiles Columns of 2025: I’ve given up wild swimming. So why does my Volvo smell like mince? Should I tell the postman he has halitosis? My first wife wouldn’t let me wear shorts. I buried my father with my bare hands. It’s time we stopped talking about glamping. 1/3

We'd pencilled in leaving for the in-laws at 9.30, so of course it's practically 11.

Make a Bond movie casual. Golden aye, right.

Right then: time to neglect that Christmas dog.

Good work, but shouldn't it be in the oven by now?

Santa's been! One of these days he'll wipe his boots. 🙄 Merry Christmas, lovely Bluesky people. ♥️

And Wowbagger The Infinitely Prolonged, who did NOT die

A belated happy birthday to @matthewwaterhouse.bsky.social 🎉

I'm imagining Sarah's mum pointing at windows accusingly and shouting "GLASS!".

This is surely more Kaiser Chiefs' territory?

A good life, and a legendary entertainer. RIP.

Scarred for life. No compensation. 🎶

Likewise.

Is it ... bin day?

A man’s motorbike makes a noise like cracking thunder crossed with gunfire. Woman (to her friend): He thinks that makes him seem manly or attractive. It makes him a twat.

"Highly recommended" - me.

Well, I guess that's what thanks you get for volunteering at Cubs in December. #WhamageddonFail

I'm giving away a copy of this year's Monster Month, just Like/Follow/Repost and you're in with a chance of winning.

Oh dear. Nadine's opened the eggnog.

FINAL book giveaway of the year. To enter: reply below & repost this extract. Up for grabs: THREE signed Villager paperbacks with free art (bookmarks & postcards) by my parents. Enter if you enjoy Folklore Nature Rivers Hills Social history Lost art Ghost Tangled psychedelic narratives Silliness

"Relax this Christmas, and let Ben Fogle handle the aardvark for you."

Thank goodness he didn't build Haphazardly, one of Britain's lousiest castles.

The Owl and the Pussy-Cat went to sea In a beautiful pea-green boat, They took some honey, and plenty of money And the plums That were in The icebox

Are @gralefrit.bsky.social and @dempster2000.bsky.social in cahoots? Yippee-ki-yay!

When do we get to know who won the FIFA Prize for Physics?

Fetch the knit nurse.

ROOOOOOOOT! So happy for Joe. #TheCricket

It’s three not very wise men lost in the desert because they can’t get a signal for Google maps

2026 has to be the year the 9yo gets his own Spotify account.

Not good news. Their margins were wafter-thin already. www.thenational.scot/news/2566069...

He's m ng ist He’s check ice He find ou naught ice Norman Collier is comi town

Now we're sucking diesel.

People really do give their children some fucking stupid names these days.

Author wrote best book he's ever written. Publisher disintegrated/fucked off with author's earnings. Book was finally published by new publisher. Author has bought two hardbacks, for full price, to give away, signed. Please repost/reply if you'd like a chance to win one.. bsky.app/profile/zygo...

Started following @oldenoughtosay.com today and now I'm concerned we're only a couple of wet weekends and/or extended droughts away from every English cathedral bar one falling over.

The BBC should tell Trump their apology is at the end of a replay of Ghost Watch that he has to watch all the way through first.

You know those people? The ones with the massive poppies for Armistice Day? Get one up on them by buying and pinning a Changing Rooms designer to your lapel.

Gary Lineker's available.

I'm a bit late to the party, but it had to be done!

Rosalind Franklin Leaving her notes in a pile That she keeps by the door Who is it for? Awful James Watson Stealing the credit And snaffling all the awards Misogynist bore

I so wish whoever designed the top of the saucer section had got to do the bottom surface as well. Looks like an afterthought. Also, Guinan and Hairy Riker from Season 2+, but no Pulaski?

I'm betting the 1% is him, and the 3% are his ex and daughters.

If you see this, quote with a robot that isn't from "Star Wars", "Star Trek", "Doctor Who", or "Transformers".

Shot, chaser.

20,000 Football Leagues Under The Sea

WHY IS IT NOT LUNCHTIME YET? It was lunchtime this time yesterday.

Jesus. Amateur hour from Chris Mason.

You just can't avoid it, can you? Near; far; wherever you are.