Austria-Argentina is a top-tier "just to be clear, what exactly did your great-grandfather do for work" game

The country that gave us H*tler and the country the Naz*s ran to after the war. Can a meteor win this group, please?

It usually takes bombing other countries to win one, but if Suarez bites or spits on enough people, he could be front-runner for the next FIFA Peace Prize.

*pans to Suarez in his suite* Jajajaja

If Saudi wanted to get chopped up this bad, all they had to do was be critical of MBS.

Advertise your BlueSky account with a Simpsons clip.

Should’ve brought on Drogba and the Touré Brothers, IMO.

Brutal. Feel like Ivory Coast deserved something from that game.

There’s no way West Ham hold on to Summerville in the Championship, right?

That second half was just awful to watch. Calling every minor thing. That was like a second half of an NBA game where every trip down the court ended in a nothing foul and free throws.

Lucky for Paraguay, this Türkiye team looks like they could play up a man for a year and never score. Truly shocked how ass they’ve been.

Legitimately did not know this was a rule. inside.fifa.com/organisation...

Nae means nae, Hakimi.

Former USMNT players interviewing current USMNT players in Spanish on Telemundo always rocks. Sorry for the insanely libbed up cringe take but cultural diversity is what makes America great. Republicans can die mad about it.

It was always more likely that we’d get Roldan on MD3 to give Adams a rest before the knockouts. Have to think that’s still true with us on 6 points and +5 GD

Marshawn Leench sighted on Telemundo.

German ref said “Ein minuten, bitte.”

pausa de hidratación

Expected way more fight from Australia, TBH.

Mr. Alex Morgan looking sharp.

Jedi doing his best Nouhou impression with that cross.

RFK Jr on hand at the World Cup in Seattle to make sure Pulisic heals up quick* *misses the rest of the tournament with a new disease that can only be contracted by eating whale placenta

Bro, who let RFK Jr. in the city?

The USMNT with a beautiful tribute to the War in Iran (own goal)

It’s is pretty fucking funny that there’s solid gold in the Brougham End. AO/US Soccer are utterly brainless. 😆

Balogun just has another gear.

Honestly, who gives a shit? It’s a not a club match and ECS is not a nationalist supporter’s section. Have fun, Aussies! 🦘

Already a Seattle legend. Once the world gets to know him too, they’ll love him.

Obeddddds

I got to hear every game in Spanish and my least favorite English-speaking commentator got hurt? What is this, Christmas?

Unrealistic. Where is Zombie ECS?

Willing to admit defeat on being a hater of the expanded tournament, but I think they should expand it even more, to 64 teams. That way qualification to the knockout stage will not be dependent on results outside of your own group. 16 groups of 4 and top 2 in each group qualify to the round of 32.

Man, what a game. Uzbeks made a good run at it.

What a play by Cucho. Holy shit.

This tournament has been great thus far.

8 DAYS A WEEK: A 2+2=5 MYSTERY

Banger of a goal from Iran too. No thanks to FIFA, this tournament has been tremendous entertainment so far.

That’s a fantastic goal from New Zealand. Incisive passing clinic.

Tunisia hasn’t had a second half this rough since the Punic Wars.

The Dutch doing this in fuckin Dallas, Texas is very funny to me, an American who has seen Cowboys fans who represent one of the most valuable sports teams on earth never approach this level of enthusiasm this century.

It’s almost like athleticism, desire, skill doesn’t have a uniform size or shape. 🤷🏻‍♂️

They gave Elfath arguably the most important match of the tournament thus far. And he hasn’t made himself the center of it. Incredible.

Australia stuntin’ on ‘em now.

This is about what I expected from Australia, but Türkiye has not been as dynamic as I thought they’d be.

What the fuck are we doing, Switzerland? 🤣

eating in mexico as a european has gotta be like hearing music for the first time

There’s a non-zero chance Tyler Adams takes another yellow next match and Roldan would almost certainly see the field in the third game to close the group stage. Especially if we’re already guaranteed to go through after 2 matches.

Also doing the full "I can't hear you" to your own fans is so on brand for Gio.

Easily the best USMNT performance in a World Cup in my lifetime. Shame it’s happening when we’re at peak international pariah status.