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Trauma conditioning is going to try to tell you every shift in their vibe is about you-- specifically, how they're unhappy w/ or about to abandon you. That's hypervigilance & the "fawn" response trying to steer the car. Breathe into it, & gently, kindly, firmly keep the wheel.

Nobody who ever recovered from trauma did so by shaming themselves, bullying themselves, or otherwise emulating our abusers & bullies. We've seen the impact of what they do. That's why we're struggling. If we do more of that, we'll get more of what we've gotten. No thanks.

Not everything depends on you-- & that's the good news. Our trauma conditioning will try to convince us everything is our fault & everything is our responsibility-- but you need to know that's the aftereffects of neglect, criticism, & past no-win situations talking. Not reality.

Realistic trauma recovery is going to bring us face to face w/ the reality that we can, actually, let ourselves rest, laugh, & experience non-painful things-- even if someone's upset w/ us, even if we're not where we want to be in recovery yet, even if we don't have "permission."

Joseph circa.... 2007? Somewhere around there-

Thunder and Storm Pair of weather controlling kamas 2024 Huevember work

I promise: you are not "betraying" or "abandoning" someone by refusing to take on responsibility for their emotional regulation. You're setting a boundary that is compassionate & realistic-- for both of you.

"I should be over this by now" is almost always a sign it's time to lean into the tools of self compassion & radical acceptance. It's not a thought that sparks sustainable motivation-- it usually means we're slipping into old BS (Belief Systems) that don't serve our recovery.

Wooww Hi, for those who don't know, it doesn't matter one single iota if your project is "free". You do not have the rights to use art you find and distribute it. That's literally what licensing is for. Your circumstance and goal has nothing to do with whether you are allowed to use anyone's art.

23 years ago today, Pokémon 4Ever - Celebi: The Voice of the Forest (M04) was first released in theaters in North America! Initially a limited release in the United States, it officially premiered on October 25, 2002. https://bulbapedia.b...

So what exactly are autistic needs? This is probably the most confusing aspect of autism. I think the reason this confuses so many people (even autistic people) is that autistic needs are literally just human needs.

Today's left handed drawing

Zeldas and Links (2023) 🩷💚 [ #RuiiArt | #LegendOfZelda ]

Many CPTSD survivors have experienced so many trauma symptoms on such a consistent basis that we feel like they've been woven into our personality-- & it can be hard to imagine disentangling who we are from, say, our "fight" response or hypervigilance symptom. But we can.

Your bullies & abusers quite intentionally programmed the idea into you that you don't have any problems that you didn't create or attract yourself. They very much want you to let them off the hook & take the hit for them, if you would be so kind. I recommend not being so kind.

You are not The Exception to the fact trauma impacts the human nervous & endocrine systems in predictable ways; & you won't be the first survivor in the history of trauma to figure out how to recover while still invalidating your pain & ignoring your needs. Sorry, not sorry.

If anyone needs a toyhouse invite code: i have 90+ Its a great side to store and showcase OC lore and artworks. Its highly customisable too! There are a lot of free codes & tutorials out there to make the oc profiles pretty!

Commission for @azizahstellazio.bsky.social 🤍 #myrmidiacommission

A question I often get when guiding guests through the imperial palace in Kyoto: why does Japan still have an Emperor? What does he even do in government? That’s a great question! What does he do? ✨NOTHING.✨ I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Or am I?

flat colours on this Ridani piece~ (she/they) #DnD #OCSky #WIP #SupportArtists

Venting is not just "blowing off steam." Putting words to our feelings & experiences, especially in the presence of someone we trust, supports us in processing what we've been through & organizing the story we're telling ourselves about it. Don't sleep on venting as a tool.

Venting is not just "blowing off steam." Putting words to our feelings & experiences, especially in the presence of someone we trust, supports us in processing what we've been through & organizing the story we're telling ourselves about it. Don't sleep on venting as a tool.

Traumatic stressors or dysfunctional attachment patterns we grew up w/ can set the stage for developing CPTSD in response to adulthood stressors, like domestic violence, spiritual exploitation, or medical trauma. CPTSD is rarely a "this one thing was THE trauma" situation.

Be a ruthless, pragmatic extremist when it comes to curating your social media, podcast, & video feeds so they give you resources supportive to your recovery. Life is too short for the stupid rage bait dopamine hamster wheel the algorithm is trying to feed you. Recovery first.

Lightsong Bow with flashbang arrows 2024 Huevember work

I drew the main cast as celebration for today 🍾 #rkrn_art #ocs #webcomic #art

I'm starting to realize that most people don't know what autistic needs are. In fact, a lot of people seem to think that autism is just the criteria and nothing more. That what you see is what you get. (Even many autistic people seem to think this.)

result of the stream!! redesigned this old oc from 2018 with my current design sensibilities and art skills! meet Jack Grimwood #oc

Our nervous & endocrine systems don't care if we, or anybody else, think whatever happened to us was "actually" trauma. Even if it was just "everyday life," we have to deal w/ its impact on us specifically. Shame & "shoulds" won't change the work ahead. It is what it is.

The backbone of realistic trauma recovery is a relationship w/ ourselves we can trust. Trauma Brain will try effortfully to get us to disbelieve, distrust, & belittle ourselves. We gotta work, daily, hourly, to be on our own side & have our own back against old conditioning.

Our traumatized nervous system is going to fall right into feeling controlled, trapped, and/or in trouble if we try to force ourselves to do things. Don't try to bully or pressure yourself. Think I'm going to try this behavior for two minutes, & always leave yourself an out.

so apparently you can make an rss feed-friendly longform blog on atprotocol and it can communicate with all the fediverse/atprotocol app views (including bluesky) but it's not under bluesky!!! about.leaflet.pub me and @hikatamika.com cooking ideas with this

okay so it's hella easy to embedd into your website too this is wayyyy better than uploading individual pages ;w;

Yes: it's overwhelmingly unfair that what happened TO us requires us to work a recovery now where we have to do specific, effortful things every day to be safe & stable. That shouldn't be on us. We don't have to love it, even as we work our recovery & take control of our life.

Maybe I’m not feeling very charitable, but I don’t love excusing parents’ ableism with “but sexism” and “doctors gaslight them.” Uh, hi, let me introduce you to being a lady-adjacent disabled person. It doesn’t turn off the capacity for critical thought and compassion. Promise.

the fact that “having children” is the norm has caused a lot of harm. Not having children should be the norm, and then you only get them if you really want them

Surefoot Boots Grease-spell proof shoes 2024 Huevember work

hell yeah we have lines today~ (Ridani; she/they) #WIP #OCSky #DnD #SupportArtists

Tala, unlike others, is not allured to the grandeur of the FAE WORLD. Even as the HUMAN WORLD starts to fall apart around her, she stays & lives out her new normal, & the loneliness that comes with it. Until a certain fae finds his way into her care. || #alignourstars #art #oc #refsheet || (1/3)

The fact that we avoid or struggle w/ things we "should" do to achieve our goals is not about "laziness"-- it's more often about conditioned resistance & anxiety. Do not let the voices of your bullies & abusers convince you you lack the "character" or "will" to do this. Breathe.

Leaving a painful situation doesn't happen all at once. It often requires planning & patience & resources that don't just appear. The fact that it took time-- or is taking time-- is NOT evidence you "don't want it." Just stay focused on today's baby steps & micro choices.

Very often our traumatized nervous system registers feeling controlled, trapped, or "in trouble" in nuanced ways that aren't immediately observable. If you're having a trauma flavored reaction, check in to see if or how your inner self is picking up on something subtle.

You learn more from cramming and bullshitting your way through a thing than you ever could when using AI generated shit.

Powered through some nasty mental health episodes bc of internet friends (does reddit count??) Started learning and healing from a bad past

One of my students asked me if, being mixed Japanese and US American, there is an aspect of American culture I don’t want to let go of I said it’s not an aspect but rather advice I got that I keep with me And it’s this: Go to the bathroom on company time 😅

Second pixel art piece! I'm gonna make a few more of these for sticker designs! #pixelart #potion #galaxy #sticker #digitalart #art #megwynroseart #megwynrose

Trauma survivors very frequently blame ourselves if we're misunderstood-- even though humans misunderstand (& misrepresent) each other all the time. There are gonna be people who wouldn't understand if you spelled it out for them w/ a Speak & Spell-- & that's not on you. Really.