Bloomburronetta

An ant can fall from any height and live. It can survive the short distance at which it reaches terminal velocity, and since it can never fall any faster it can’t die from gravity alone. Also Stephanie McMahon is an anagram for The Macho Man Penis.

“Spiderfly” Jimmy Snuka leaping through the window of the George Washington Motor Lodge.

I just saw a YouTube video called I Grew Hair On My Meat, And Here’s Why I’d Do It Again. I could not click away fast enough, but now every bit of it is gnawing at my brain.

SKY BELDAR is a hell of a name.

Happy Monday! Here’s a dumb little video for @maffewgregg.bsky.social.

This guy was hidden in my lands in an earthbending jumpstart pack, and I have to believe that’s a flavorful easter egg and not a production mishap.

VALLEY BORN VALLEY BRED WHEN THEY PUT ME IN THE GROUND I’LL BE LEHIGH VALLEY DEAD

It’s like I always say: Poop and then shower, fresh as a flower Shower then poop, GODDAMMIT

I don’t know who this is for. Sometimes I just make videos so maybe I can pass the dumb idea in my head to someone else like a mind virus, and I can live in peace.

Yawns are your soul silently screaming.

OH HELL YEAH LEMME BUILD THAT BIG PIG

Happy Circulatory System Walking Through the Kitchen Day! Don’t forget to smash your clocks!

Probably never going to watch the show, but @electrolemon.bsky.social sure did make me love it in the strangest little way possible.

In case of fire, Roger Rabbit away from the flames.

I tried to read this before I scrolled far enough to see it involved song titles, and attempting to parse “Hey, where is guys like me? Where is it’s not, where is you do?” pretty much emptied whatever juice I had running my brain for the rest of the day.

Hell yeah. Speaking of Left Behind… I wrote this song a little over a year ago, and it’s more true every day. youtube.com/shorts/Y6RJm...

[Pink Floyd guitar] HEY! TEACHER! SUPERMAN THAT HO!

One last time: Every time I post it he goes up five more points.

His lack of a heart made this inevitable, but his strong will kept him alive long enough to endorse Kamala Harris and really italicize how far the current Democratic Party has slid to the right. Satanspeed, brave warrior…

once people embrace that you can like a thing that sucks, they can be free

The butthole is greater than the sum of its farts.

After nearly thirty years away I’ve fallen off the wagon and I’m buying Magic: The Gathering again. Avatar rules, Commander seems fun, and opening packs still feels amazing. So a question for anyone in the know…do I sell this, play with it, or sit on it until they make more Infinity Stones?

This is all well and good until the parasite that dachshunds kept at bay proliferates unchecked in his absence.

What else can fuel a weathered soul quite like a good off-model gas station Garfield?

I weep for those that do not have the capacity to enjoy writing shitty books. Not only is the grind joyous, but now I have a giant hardcover collection of absolute trash that I get to trick people into reading. (pictured next to a giant stein with a baby kicking an old man’s ass for scale)

That time of year again. Print one out for the werewolf kid in your life.

Listening to Daniel Garcia’s entrance… #AEWDynamite 🤼‍♂️

I loved Blaster Master Zero, which smoothed the rough edges of the original. Then I played Zero 2 and hated it because it was too different. Later I went back to play Zero 2 again, got used to its quirks, and loved it…and then hated 3 because it was too different. I should probably try BM03 again.

This one dumb cartoon is responsible for so many of the dumb phrases that still live in the back of my head. “Oh no, hot soup is in my eyes.” “Go away, Nebulon. Nobody likes your style.” “THASS A GOOD DAAANCE!” “I can flow. I can freak. I can freak and flow at the same time.”

Good Frog by James Kochalka Superstar kochalka.bandcamp.com/album/good-f...

I thought the tiny smile was a nose and…THAT dude is up to something.

This is, and perhaps I shouldn’t be so shocked by this, insanely Kochalka-coded. The son’s got the juice, raw and unprocessed. Get a taste.

Time traveling back to 2015 so I can steal past me’s phone and tweet “When Mojo Rawley gets pinned, that’s a Bro Job.”

No rock guitar has ever sounded better than on Eight Arms to Hold You by Veruca Salt, but you’re welcome to share your wrong opinions with me.

This feels like it’s tailor made for an older man I used to work with who “wasn’t racist” but wished there could be a special version of channels for black people so he could see more white people in his ads again.

Eddie being Eddie nonstop for 34 minutes. God bless.

They’re literally playing back taxation without representation. How anyone can see this as anything but unAmerican is beyond me, but that gambler’s fallacy is a hell of a thing.

youtu.be/V5SXX_qFPUQ Botchamania 520! Crown Jewel Perth, sweary crowds, NXT Invasion uhh Showdown, confiscated signs, bad announcers, Taz getting balls thrown at him and everything else keeping wrestling sane.

Anyone else lose the #AEWWrestledream stream and have it replaced with a magic eye picture?

This is one frame. Her head moved this distance in 1/30 of a second.

This is an objectively funny vehicle, but the best part is that my wife busted out laughing at the quote and he turned and saw her doing it. She may or may not have been pointing at the time.

Daredevil had a lot of great covers during the Bendis years, but this one is way up there. Such a simple, striking image. It jumped off the rack.

The existence of a Dominic Toretto implies there must also be a Subinic Toretto.

We let right wing accounts exist here. They’re the Democrats. We’re walling out the bigots and actual Nazis. If you want to hear from *them*…well, goodbye to you too, I guess. Get blocked, see ya never.

Oh, nothing. Just going out.

I get that humor is objective and money is tight for just about everyone right now, but in my esteemed opinion anyone who doesn’t jump on this is a fucking idiot. Kupperman’s a truly original comic mind. This is a way to get a consistent flow of genius absurdity. It’s priceless, dummy.

The only other person to know the secret is @jmaq.bsky.social