Every issue comes down to Republicans: we hate [every minority] Democrats: y’know I do have concerns about [every minority]

It’s always the ones you most suspect

“Women need to have more babies but also the pregnancy must be as painful as possible the way God intended for women’s original sin” - most pastors this week

No one knows how to spell acetomenophin

We have to defeat the anti woke mind virus

Other countries should start sinking cruise ships because why not

She’s never seen The Simpsons before

I’m voting for the next candidate that demands all pregnant women take acetaminophen

The Wire writers be like, “yo, how many white guys can we get to say the n word in this episode”

Used to be when you went broke you also went woke. Now everything’s broke and they’re canceling woke!

Funniest shit I ever read

Gonna be honest with you all. People ain’t gonna quit TikTok just because it’s gonna be owned by Fox. It’s gonna be like twitter and all their favorite big accounts are gonna get paid to stay and the majority of followers won’t leave.

Drove past storm king dozens of times, finally stopped today

Answer the question, historians

So I guess Disney doesn’t have a team of assassins to fix shit

Me and my friends love to discuss drop points and circling back and our old man

Just finished sucking Jimmy Kimmels peen 🫡 Whose turn is it next?

If you asked NYT what they connected on and they answered honestly, they’d be cancelled

american politics is basically like yeah i trust the tickle monster to make fair and equitable policy on tickling

Yeah that’s probably the best way to go

This is literally the sanewashing people are pissed about. Saying it over and over doesn’t make it right. And normalizing it just because “duh president is also like this” is dumb as shit

I’ll be honest, I’m a bit scared of the military becoming even more white and I think it’s about time to leave the country

More like Charlie Woke. What kind American man drinks Starbucks

If we wanna be honest this is what posting is

The follow-up post is the best part.

Imagine going to war because this thing told you to die to protect whiteness

I also would trade JD Vance for pills (ibuprofen)

Go look at @schumer.senate.gov page and see how much he’s said about this Spoilers: nothing, dudes jorkin it about Trump and the budget. No leadership here

Getting this bag in like bilbo

Dear God, if you’re listening, send us a Light Yagami

Is Google getting worse?

Only if you watch the video in reverse

Wait, wasn’t Charlie Kirk supposed to have risen again today? What happened with that?

Ah shit they fired me for not being aware of Charlie Kirk’s death

Somewhere out there are a bunch of sickos that subscribe to HBO just for Bill Maher. Freak shit.

what exactly did you agree with him on, sally? was it these? was it when he said black women don’t have the same brain power as white people? was it when he said if his 10 year old daughter was raped he’d force her to carry the baby? was it when he said we should be stoning LGBTQ+ people to death?

Maybe I’m just a little too woke these days but I absolutely don’t think you have to platform Nazis so they can “grow”

I think if rw people irl ask you about Charlie Kirk you should just reply with, “who’s Charlie Kirk?”

I brought up that Charlie Kirk died and this one Irish dude on the trip that I didn’t expect to be like this at all was like “oh no way that’s like my favorite podcaster! I listened to him every day for the last 2 years and saw him at a Trump rally” and I was stunned

If I was pulling off an overly elaborate scheme where I pretended to be a ghost to steal a bunch of money, I wouldn't get caught by some teenagers and a dog.

Who got that one Charlie Kirk shooting video

I was up on a mountain the last 6 days what’d I miss?

We’re bringing back mega fauna, no more of this woke fauna

it's funny how you could legally homeschool your child to just be an expert in Frasier or something

My digital artbook 'POWER' is a folio of paintings from 2009-2019 including your favorites like these here, as well as a never-before-seen short story 'SWIM' that I wrote for a local zine about Taipei party culture. Get it here: ko-fi.com/s/f0c582ca07

I still think this is one of my best posts

Oh this one’s me