Who up jorking it totally normal style

Sending a copy of the letter from the piano teacher to the internships that want an essay abt my career goals in addition to a cover letter

What if instead of an eyebrow piercing I had a tattoo that went up onto my neck

Ok so now my eyebrow piercing is pissed at me because I idk tried to sleep w that side of my face near my gf last weekend??? I have an appointment to get the jewelry changed next week but be real with me you guys do I need to yeet it 😬😬

I did a whole bunch of kissing this weekend and I need to do a whole bunch more

Ohhhh agggghhh uhh oouuhhggh

Watching two movies and then having a steak and a cocktail with a pretty girl and then watching two more movies really takes it out of you

Had to delete a genuine post because I typo’d “realizing” as “resizing” god damnit

My girlfriend has promised me there will be both rocking AND rolling tonight

yeah i'll vote for gavin newsom under extreme circumstances. like say we're on a life raft and need to decide who to eat first. or our plane crashes in the andes and we're figuring out who to barbecue for dinner. or if we're wagon-bound and stranded in a frozen pass over the sierra nevada mountains,

I swear to god sometimes there’s just a bullseye on my eyebrow piercing, last night I smacked it in my sleep and just now I hit it directly with a fucking broom while sweeping my room!! Why!!!!!!

POV you’re a daffodil and I’m looking at you

For breakfast I either have the most decadent meal known to man or a cool, soothing goo with fruit and nuts

Fellas, is it morally justifiable to log off?

Hey so before I go to sleep, my roommate and good friend fell down the stairs as she was bringing me a heating pad for my food poisoned tummy right after Christmas. She broke her foot and because we live in America it's become a huge financial burden. If you're able to help/share I'd appreciate it

One thing that going home & spending time w my 78-year-old dad did show me was that I have truly become amazingly lazy lol

I DO NOT CARE IF THE PERSON ICE IS BRUTALIZING IS A U.S. CITIZEN OR NOT AND EVERY TIME YOU MAKE THE DISTINCTION IT'S LIKE YOU'RE SAYING YOU'RE FINE WITH THEM BRUTALIZING IMMIGRANTS

I should introduce myself to my neighbor and ask if I can trim their grapevine that’s overrunning our plum tree and not just reach 2 ft over the fence and cut it back right >.>

i'm like a goat the way i need some cans in my mouth

I’ll post a picture from 2016 if you send me 25 bucks

*wistful, yearning* when will my housemate get out of the bathroom???

I am really not sure what the other side of this looks like that isn’t that scene in the White House at the end of Civil War

What if I just sent in Nicole Kidman’s AMC speech to this internship that wants an essay on “my interest in the motion picture industry”

Guess who let a bottle of wine leak on their laptop in their backpack 😎😎😎

I thought the tree was going hella early this year but luckily my frantic posting from last year reminded me that this is normal now

Poppies coming up where I didn’t expect them :)

I’ve got stuff I’m looking forward to from now until next Christmas

Christian-style Hell House where behind every door there’s a cat that’s annoyed with you for a different reason

My Housemate said “can I say something abt your hair without you getting mad? You look like Jonathon Taylor Thomas in home improvement” and honestly I thought they were gonna say something WAY worse than that wow

The New Parkway in Oakland needs a little less than $8k in 4 days to meet their kickstarter goal if you’re trying to support a scrappy little theater www.kickstarter.com/projects/new...

Is there a way to get a haircut and say “leave it kind of shaggy” and they leave it kind of shaggy

Haha no I don’t have anxiety abt going to get a haircut at a new place you’re dumb for even thinking that!

I love my cat but his entitlement abt sitting in my lap borders on disrespectful

I need a job so I can buy my girlfriend wildly impractical lingerie

I am fundraising for an anonymous friend, who is a trans sex worker and POC. They are at risk of losing custody of their children. Please, please donate. This is a situation that is painful and scary beyond description. PLEASE SHARE GRAPHICS WIDELY 🫂 www.gofundme.com/f/help-keep-... 🫂

I thought I was prepared to be shocked by this and I was not, this is about as much as I was making in my part-time entry level retail job last year to run an entire library

I threw on the first episode of mad men for the first time since I watched the whole series years ago and I gotta tell ya I think there’s something up with this guy Salvatore and it’s not just that he’s Italian

I’ve been cleared to share this despite the destabilizing effect it may have on the posting ecosystem of bluesky

There is a GFM for Juan Carlos the young man beaten, kidnapped and robbed by ICE We can support his healing efforts: gofund.me/6766048bc

Hey I’m just like you, I put one “I only wore this once so it’s not dirty” shirt on a chair in my bedroom at a time until you can’t see the chair or my desk really even

my girl's in the next room, she doesn't fist me like you i guess i never really moved on

Sacramento River from headwaters to the Bay baybeee!!!!

There are too many movies I want to see!!!!!

Who has a st. Andrew’s cross I can borrow

They should invent a house you don’t have to mask in

Just did this w some curry @rosemary.world made and sent me home with in case you’re wondering if I learned how to chew yet

Tonight was my 1 year t anniversary, somehow I have managed to beat the odds and haven’t gotten so horny that i literally died despite a couple of close calls

But girl you make it hard to be faithful With the fist of an angelllll

Wow i’m so glad Google Photos put a cutest little whistle-clap song over the videos/photos I took 3 years ago of our laundry room ceiling goatsc.ex’ing itself after a big rain storm