Fuck it I’m wearing my Friday the 13th socks to the sex party

Called my mom and caught up on everything she’s doing to try to preemptively keep her husband happy w/o him asking her to and the ways he subtly tells her she’s doing it wrong soooo nothing new over there lol

I’d be so fucked if I got the ring curse I’d be like “I have 7 days to investigate and figure this out” and spend the first 48 hours dicking around on my phone

*pointing at a straight couple* sooo which one of you is mark polonia and which one is john polonia

When people who haven’t seen me in a while are like “whoa dude your voice” 😎🥺💅🌚

Cat boy April is over beautiful flower girl May is NOW

Just submitted my last big thing for the semester, I do in fact have one (1) more discussion post due on Tuesday thx to the canvas h4x0rz so if I told you irl I’d be done today I was wrong

After weeks of low move watching I finally have a different most recent four 😤

Lotta cryptid jokes in my life this morning…. What could it mean for my day…..

FINALLY THANK YOU MARIA

Y’all I’ve been trying to inhale this vcr cleaner but i feel pretty normal is something supposed to happen

Oh no got a zit on my arm in the middle of my tattoo and it looks like Isabella Adjani has one nipple…… one zit nipple…..

I understand why I didn’t keep my “everything was beautiful and nothing hurt” shirt w the guy getting sawn in half from NIN’s 2014 tour but I reeaallly wish I had actually kept it

Can you die from being too horny asking for a friend

Totally neutral just stating a fact, our water heater isn’t working and when I told our landlord what was going on and what we’d tried/that it did nothing he replied saying chatGPT said to do the same thing we’d already told him we’d tried :)

One of my professors emailed all of the instructions and videos on our final project due tomorrow since and one just sent an email saying “canvas is down, hopefully it will be back soon” lol

Got so excited to be in my own bed that I forgot to go to sleep

Maybe I’m just an over sensitive baby but the Castro looks beautiful and feels like they took away some of its soul

Abt 1/3 of the way into Nevada, I really need this girl to do her shot

Hmmm what should I wear to this archival show at a film festival where I’ll probably see people I want to work with in a professional capacity one day and why is it my “anus films” shirt

happy out of touch thursday!

Eating some goop #goop

If I were the head of trust and safety at bluesky I simply would not like porn from my professional account 😇

so many people got suspended for talking about aaron roderick's liked posts, but not everyone. you might say it's barely legal to talk about

want

$200 short on rent at the new place that must be paid by tomorrow night. also multiple other bills coming up in the next week no donations in 6 days please keep sharing gofund.me/2d608152a venmo: gayley_williams cashapp: gayleywilliams paypal.me/chemrain 💕💸🏳️‍⚧️ mutual aid

Gaze upon my works nerds

You should come hang out in my yard

My big opinion today is this morning I fed my girlfriend a bead of nectar i teased out of a honeysuckle blossom and as she sucked it out from between my fingers I felt touched by something holy

Anarchist trans prisoner Marius Mason is finally being released after seventeen of a twenty-two year sentence! To celebrate his release and help him land on his feet, we will give Marius $2 for every item sold at akpress.org in the month of May. You can also donate directly at supportmariusmason.org

Wow this really sucks lol

Somebody glued a bunch of fuzz all over my ass when I wasn’t paying attention 🤨🤨🤨

Fuck the Devil (or even Return of the Fucker) ReAnimator Liquid Dreams

🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️ SUMMONING A COOL JOB THAT I WANT OPENING APPLICATIONS THIS WEEK AND FOR THEM TO ACTUALLY GET BACK TO ME WHEN I APPLY 🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️

tramp stamp idea

@hatredbitch.bsky.social 5%

@rosemary.world has just hit season 2 of the venture bros and has said to me “lotta gender going on in this uhhhh in this cartoon”

Interview was fine I think but it turns out the position is full time and it would be a 2-hour commute each way ssssooooooo

Y’all think I should try to pop my pecs during this virtual interview or will they not really be able to see it over the computer

The new list includes literally everything under the sun, under which only a "reasonable suspicion" is required to track your movements in the database, such things as "stolen property offenses", "pornography", "reckless driving", "material witness" and "threats/harassment"

Great piece that is equal parts infuriating and revealing :)

💚

Final week of the semester and then I am going to go buck-fucking-wild in my yard

Wha should should I wear for my virtual fellowship interview today and why is it the cutoff t that says “NO GODS NO RAZORS I LOVE BUSH”

I think I could kiss for like an hour straight. Like an hour or maybe up to 6 months

God I love reading some technical report on guidelines for some nitpicky thing an seeing “computers cannot perform this task”

Ohhh lord she’s in the bucket