Ding dong, the other witch is dead

I don't give a shit about football, but I just heard my favourite stat about this World Cup. Every single country taking part has universal healthcare... Except one. Can you guess ?

@kermodemovie.bsky.social I should like to personally apologise for your appearance in Private Eye this week

credit to Sally Nugent who just, in normal circumstances, brought Nigel Farage's political career to an end. If polls don't plummet after this, I will be truly astonished.

"Tell Jabba I'll get him his money..."

The Guardian never, ever writes"Whoopi Goldberg, whose real name is Caryn Johnson", or "Elton John, whose real name is Reg Dwight". But they do this for Tommy Robinson EVERY SINGLE TIME THEY MENTION HIM. Why? I'm all for ridiculing him, but this comes across as childish and unprofessional.

Hello! It doesn’t cost anything to repost but it helps me spread the word about my small business. My online shop is full of bold & colourful prints, homewares, T-shirts and cards. I’m also available for freelance design work and art licensing. gailmyerscough.co.uk

The US renamed the Gulf of Mexico, and the rest of us ignored them. In the same vein, we should collectively agree to rename Hormuz to The Trump Strait, so we can commemorate the greatest geopolitical self-own in history. The US will ignore it of course, but that'll just make it funnier.

Every summer I repost this article on how to spot drowning. Please read it and pass on. In the last few years I’ve had SIX messages from people who saved a kid’s life after clicking on the link from my feed. slate.com/technology/2...

The Stone Guns n Roses

I've just seen a car with the numberplate 4 LOS. This pleases me. I'm hoping it's not because those are the owner's initials. I'm hoping it's because it's their fourth car, and they know loS is Klingon for ”four"

Late, but: Twelve Monkeys The Thing Alien/Aliens Forbidden Planet Planet of the Apes Phase IV Dark City Blade Runner Rocky Horror Picture Show Primer

From the Guardian Blind Date column, presented without comment.

Wordle 1,767 3/6 ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

@gralefrit.bsky.social brilliant takedown here of using AI to do *even a bit* of your writing. www.facebook.com/share/v/18ja...

30 years on, and Jacqueline Natla describing the tomb of Qualopec as "unfound" still grinds my gears. "Lost", love. The word you want is "lost". I should probably let it go.

Great use of the word "obviously" in this column, made me laugh out loud www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...

Recreate your own Artemis splashdown with three Tunnocks teacakes and a Nespresso pod

Today I learned (while introducing my 7 year old to the TV version of Hitchhikers) that Colin Jeavons is still with us at the grand old age of 96. Bless you Colin.

Golden retriever runs 15 feet after owner mimes throwing tennis ball

This is one of the most accurate explanations & predictions I’ve seen. Thank you, Secretary Rubio. Were you lying then? Or, has the republic completely crumbled?

The spirit of Monkey was... IRREPRESSIBLE!

What am I giving up for Lent? Calm. Kindness. Kinship. Love. I've given up all chance at inner peace. I've made my mind a sunless space.

Today I learned there, was a Pokestop on Epstein's island, and Niantic removed... THREE DAYS AGO. I really don't know what to do with this information. It feels like reality itself is... broken, somehow.

I hope Russel T Davies's Dr Who Christmas special kills the show. Temporarily. I hope it stays off air for about 30 years. Then someone writes a triumphant return in 2055. And the show runs 8 years from then, and does a 100th anniversary special. That writer is about 16 years old already...

Five jobs I've had: Barman Kidney Research fundraiser Chocolate factory process engineer (i.e. Willy Wonka, effectively) Sales assistant in Dixons electricals Drinking water analyst

Please share. 💔

If ICE murdering a white male gun owner, in broad daylight, on video is the last straw that stirs Americans to action... that's fucked up. And if it's NOT... I don't even know a phrase for what that is.

Things that get said in my house: Her: you know what I mean! Me: no. I know what you *said*

Today I realised with sadness that, as time goes on, there are fewer and fewer of us who, when we go to a carpet shop, are compelled to do an impression of Speedy Gonzalez

The world is learning. When I was a kids, the bad guys were ze Germans. Then da Ruskies. Then the Arabs. Now in media, it's starting to coalesce around bad guys = rich people. Which is (a) more like real life and (b) doesn't require racism.

kids these days don't know how to impress Jodie Foster

Why isn't "young mother murdered" trending on bluesky?! #timwalz #ICE

Saw a trailer for Avengers :Doomsday today that actually made me less likely to watch it. The number of characters they're shoehorning in means it's going to have to be either 6 hours long or run at 240 fps just to get everyone in.

Google image search Estonian national Opera car park barriers. You're welcome.

We got stone stands, antique lands, And miles and miles of level sands Old hunks, half sunk Hanging round without a trunk Lifeless things, king of kings Whasisname has had a push Lying in the desert sand Cold command upon his mush Mush, mush, mush, mush…

Turley letter to Lam, as posted on X

What car is this?

I love print media @theonion.com @bencollins.bsky.social

@robinince.bsky.social... will be KBOs. But no. The options were Uranus, Neptune, Mercury & Saturn. Mercury was apparently discovered in 1500BC, and Saturn - the 5th or sixth brightest object in the sky - was discovered in 1610. I remonstrated to no avail. Loving the book.

@robinince.bsky.social I just read p152 of "I'm a joke etc". I was at a PTA quiz night earlier this year. One round was "put 4 things in order". One question was "when planets were discovered". Ooh, I thought, this will be interesting - only 2 actual planets were discovered, so at least 2 options...

I recently had cause to phone my mobile. I was startled to hear my own voice asking me to leave a message, because I realised that I recorded that message in May 1999 and have never changed it. Sure as hell can't change it now.

The mathematician John Venn was born on this day in 1834. To commemorate the occasion, here’s a poem in the form of a Venn diagram.

Genius: chinwag.au/verification/

Mon Mothma is the BEST in Andor, and Genevieve O'Reilly is a gorgeous, gorgeous woman. Couldn't do better.

I am unreasonably annoyed that every headline about Felix Baumgartners death says it was is a "paraglider" accident. Then mentions the engine. It's just sloppy and wrong. Google "Gell-Mann amnesia"