Greetings from Derry

Lemon ginger cookies are out and they are amazing!

Baked this really yummy gingerbread cake, and now I’ve got lemon ginger cookies in the oven 🤤

The grasshopper gets it — divide and conquer. Today’s robber barons use the same playbook. But together, we have all the power. Watch.

Lake Ontario, with sound

Wanna see some stars?

What a difference a day makes

Zach Woods Torches Tarantino For Recent Actor-Bashing: “You Probably Would F*ck One Of Your Opinions If You Could”

Lake Ontario

This entire grift relies on convincing people that they don't know how to do the things they have always known how to do, and ironically, if it works, we will, in a very short amount of time, forget how to do all the things we have always known how to do.

The only thing I ever learned about Canada is they'll make any flat service into a hockey rink.

Nothing says getting into the festive spirit like going online to shout at some biscuits

Love seeing the internet turn out for Paul Dano this week, but quick question: Why does anyone give a fuck what Tarantino says? It would have been so much better if his comment had just disappeared into the thinnest of air as if he didn’t even exist.

Making mulled wine in my little cauldron

Sunshine rainbow lady

i’m so happy for him

Are you still massively against me breaking into your home and stealing all your stuff so I can sell it or have you moved more towards acceptance?

Special agent Dana Scully ✨

My retro holiday record player wall is done. I think Elvis needs a Santa hat.

Is my audition tape for Jaw Breaker too late?

Dating me is 60% cuteness and cuddles and 40% wondering if I’m hiding in that closet, about to jump out and scare you… or maybe I’m behind the door… or squished behind the washing machine… you won’t know… until it’s too late

I feel like every November my decision to put the holiday decorations up early is a direct result of being in fight or flight mode for so long that I somehow think that drenching my house in lights and garland will cure me, but it never does.

He's a 10 but his life, his love, and his lady is the sea

TRUNK HARDMEAT!

Wasn’t even the worst (best?) part of the conversation. Two minutes later he bragged about how many dates he’d been on last week and then said, “It’s just hard because I have incredibly high standards.” He looked like the human equivalent of a slice of white bread. It’s always the most mediocre men.

Overheard conversation at next table: Girl: I can’t believe you broke up with Kate, you were so good together. Boy: I know, and I’ll always love her so much, but I just started wondering, what if she’s not the one. What if my real person is out there and I miss them because I’m with her…

A completely sobering experience

Rompers are cute until you’re suddenly sitting naked in a public bathroom stall

Reminder: If you use generative AI for *any of your writing tasks* you are a Slopper not a writer and should be ashamed of yourself. The end.

Like all mediocre artists, I’ve done my time in the service industry to make sure the bills are paid… If you’re a person who doesn’t tip, may I please ask that you try to be as unproblematic as possible? Don’t ask for extras. Don’t make me go above and beyond when you won’t even meet me half way.

Magical nature hikes today

it says a lot about the average politician that this guy seems to expect that zohran mamdani only said what he said to get elected and doesn’t actually believe in anything

“They contend that the policy “reinforces the gender stereotype that men are more dangerous than women.”” I know I’m biased because a male taxi driver attempted to kidnap me when I was just trying to get home safe after getting too drunk one night, but I’m pretty sure that’s a fact not stereotype.

When you accidentally match your boots with the floor 💁‍♀️

Girls are soft and cute and you should kiss their foreheads (consensually)

There’s a rose petal in my mimosa! 🥰

the sandwich guy walking away from the court house and suddenly, his limp disappears

Girls are soft and cute and you should kiss their foreheads (consensually)

Playing with felt today 🥰

Why I’m Not Around Much, a story in three parts: Mutual: “Repost this with your favourite Talking Heads song! Mine is Once in a Lifetime!” Me, a Talking Heads fan: *reposts* “Girlfriend is Better!” Mutual: *blocks me* Is it just me, or is this place kinda fucked up??

Living with a teenager in your home is like being haunted. You hear them, but never see them, and sometimes things just disappear without a trace, like cookies, and your weed.

When you recount this election day:

RAVENOUS (1999) Cinematography by Anthony B. Richmond Directed by Antonia Bird 🎥

HEY KIDS!

Quick question… Why does America seem hell-bent on ruining the entire globe?

long live the queen

Portrait of a shy girl who decided to host a Halloween party, secretly convinced that no one would really show up, but has just received confirmation that instead of no one, about 50 people are coming, and now she’s freaking out because that’s too many people!!! Wish me luck!!

This game is so old DiCaprio has lost interest in it

sobbing as mom makes me smoke a whole pack of baseball in one sitting