Woman next to me on this train is playing slots on her phone and has reloaded her account with what looks like £25 five times in 20 minutes. The Monzo kerching noise is driving me insane.

#72: Shag a massive apple

Off whoring.

I wonder who is going to present breakfast on this new station for six weeks before moving to weekends?

Things I have seen on social media this morning.

Appendages have been Veeted and a tonne of psyllium husk swallowed, so I’m ready for my trip to the gentlemen’s establishment tomorrow.

Many will focus on the cockenballs, but don't neglect Feathers McGraw.

wikipedia turns 25 today! the last unenshittified major website! backbone of online info! triumph of humanity! powered by urge of unpaid randos to correct each other! somehow mostly reliable! "good thing wikipedia works in practice, because it sure doesn't work in theory" - old wiki adage

Awaiting developments.

Is the dalek behind her super huge or is she just really tiny?

This headline was funnier than the entire revival series of Spitting Image they did a few year back.

New Blog - 1. Hooton - www.merseytart.com/2026/01/1-ho... - where I start my revisit of Merseyrail's stations with The History Bit.

Powerful Bidet Blasts Hole Clean Through Man

Me: I like those boxer shorts. Also me: Are you seeking to buy the boxer shorts or the arse inside the boxer shorts? Me: Uhhh, probably the arse. Also me: And will your saggy arse look the same in those boxer shorts? Me, sadly: No.

Uh, thank you, Amazon, but I've seen it... on Prime... and whilst it isn't the worst movie ever made, it's down there.

Wikipedia25 has launched! Oh.

Here’s @dansavage.bsky.social’s playlist of Feast of the Ass carols.

Funny, these are also my fantasy dinner party guests. I’ll be serving my famous foraged mushroom risotto.

Considering a leg massage next week (50% of people with EDS say it really helps, 50% say it absolutely cripples them, watch me flip a coin) and found a local gay-owned place. Now the question becomes... legit or serial killer? Instagram account was no help.

Because January isn't miserable enough, I'm not only not drinking but also spending a week only having protein shakes in order to lose the weight I put on over Christmas.

BBC journo unaware of what day of the week it is.

Thirty years ago Western politics used to be run by skilled, ruthless and successful operators like Tony Blair. Nowadays it's run by slipshod fanatical snake oil salesmen, like Tony Blair.

Now kiss.

I am once again reminding you all that the UK government introduced an Online Safety Act that is effectively a porn ban on most adult porn websites, but is dithering over banning a website that is actually creating child porn.

I have added these four original drawings to my website, three are inky and include purple. Sharing these posts helps me. ⬇️ www.chloecumming.com The skull/monkey is here, because it’s a monoprint-drawing. Check out this gallery, it doesn’t get many views: www.chloecumming.com/monoprintdra...

Put my anti-insomnia plan into action last night by just getting up after I'd had my 45 minutes of sleep. Therefore I'm fucking exhausted now but, in theory, should sleep tonight.

The Highway Code rule 112b: LED headlights

Last year, we reached the lowest per capita homicide rate in recorded history - not by chance, but as a result of our tough action on violent crime and our preventative approach. We’re on the right path. www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...

If the Grauniad’s style guide allowed semicolons in headlines, I wouldn’t have had to read this sentence six times.

This title card makes this documentary look like a one-series sitcom by LWT in the late ‘80s

“Just because there are no *romantic* feelings, doesn’t mean that I have no feelings at all.” NEW blog, ‘casual’ sex doesn’t mean you get to treat the other person with contempt. www.girlonthenet.com/blog/casual-... Fabulous art by @stuartcb.bsky.social ❤️

I think I'm going to slow cook a ragù for use later in tonight's dinner.

i hope the first one works because i just don’t think i can fit a second one in there

Note that it was her second favourite toy. I suppose if I was bleeding, or surrounded by paramedics, *then* she’d’ve brought me Squeaky Turkey, her most favourite toy. But not until, clearly. I know my place.

Somehow managed to trip (and dislocate my right ankle) while taking my pants off. As I sat on the floor gently swearing, Rabbit Dog rushed over and presented me with Squeaky Salmon, her second favourite toy. I thought this was a show of concern. Nope. She wanted me to throw it for her to fetch.

BRB, just updating the artwork for the new Morrissey album

Fox on the move

And seatbelts not compulsory to wear in the front seats! The Sunday before it became a legal requirement, my parents started wearing seatbelts to get used to it. That was the day we were hit at speed from behind. (They were both fine; my sister and me in the seatbeltless back… slightly less so.)

I’ve added the four recent inky drawings to my site as originals for sale, Friday seems like the right day for this kind of thing. (The dove is in the ‘doves’ gallery) Thank you for looking and reposts are v appreciated. www.chloecumming.com www.chloecumming.com/doves-1

Orange fox with orange trees

Most RAF camps had some sort of cinema but they were all terrible. When we were at RAF Coningsby, the Kinema in the Woods over in Woodhall Spa was enchanting comparatively. I believe I saw Ghostbusters, Gremlins, Star Trek III, Back to the Future and The Goonies there. #ChildhoodCinema

“For only £11 a month, you can make as much violent, misogynistic and child sexual abuse material as you like!” UK media: most people can’t use Grok to make images now, so no point banning it

It took Keir Starmer almost a week take a negative stance against the mass production of child pornography

I'm getting royally fucked off with my fourth week of insomnia. Always of the same pattern: get into bed knackered, fail to sleep, finally drop off at 3 or 4am, wake up 45 mins later, get back off at about 8am, wake at noon or later with the day wasted. Luckily things are quiet work-wise, but FFS.

You are allowed to protect your mental health by blocking, unfollowing or muting any account here – it's fine. If you don't want to do that, you can vaporise individual posts with the '…' menu on a post. You can put yourself first to save up energy for later fights.