Out of office about to go on for a welcome week off work for me 40th. Cotswolds first this weekend then lots of boring nerdy stuff next week. Kiss my face!

Tax YOUR MUM

At this point, I wonder if he isn't lying when he says he has "my highest Poll Numbers, ever" since it's entirely possible that's what his aides are telling him. It's quite likely that there's an entire Potemkin village built around Trump right now.

Roll up, roll up, come see the world’s most wrong man.

Here’s my CHRISTMAS GIFT TIP. You can buy all Michael Palin’s books and DVDs and suchlike off his website, and he signs and dedicates the item for no extra charge. Don’t say I don’t give you nowt. (I did this for my dad, and he didn’t notice the autograph on his Ripping Yarns.) themichaelpalin.com

Problem being everyone who supports him either already knows or doesn’t care that he’s a bigot.

Somehow, we managed to reach Peak Manchester United and Peak Everton on the same evening, a stoppable force meeting an extremely movable object.

Good from Everton and tenth-rate from United. Utter shite.

Foul throws now. Fucking dimwits.

Zirkzee is fucking useless man haha. You can only do the languid Berbatov bit if you’re actually good and effective like Berbatov.

Very pleasing to see how deeply sad and inadequate this utter cunt is 😃

Can almost guarantee Everton will win 1-0 now btw.

RFK Jr. Denies Ever Laying Eggs In Olivia Nuzzi https://theonion.com/rfk-jr-denies-ever-laying-eggs-in-olivia-nuzzi/

Gueye’s head has left orbit at warp speed there hahahah.

Kinda admire her madness as it is so close to logical and just misses every time.

Lord Farmer said the #AssistedDyingBill is 'an atheist bill that assumes there is nothing after death.' If you hold a religious belief that means you do not want an assisted death, you have every right to live – and die – by that conviction. What you don’t have is the right to impose it on others.

Comfort rewatch of Tinker Tailor in progress here. The film. I’ll save the BBC series (both, maybe) for a rewatch over Christmas. Cold War-tastic.

Think Frank wants some of this sandwich.

"And now we move on to liars.."

Turns out the media & most of Parliament is as out of touch with reality as Twitter. Dear England.

Close to heroic this from Ireland considering they’re not just getting the shitty end of the stick but a big stick wholly made of shit.

A genuine great imho

Caught the cricket up. Do I not like that.

Bed heads: recently I've been adopting what I'm calling the 'folded flatbread' technique, in which the blanket is folded lengthwise into a C-shape facing out of the bed. The sleeper i.e. me or you (or them) is then wrapped in this cocoon of comfort. Try it amd let me know how you get on 👍

Hard not to watch Layer Cake when you stumble upon it. A quiet classic imho.

Imagine being one of those CEOs or school presidents who bowed down to this weird old man, then realizing he doesn’t like you as much as he likes this guy who didn’t bow at all

TRUMP [after spending 5 minutes with Zohran]: surplus value, it’s a very wonderful thing, very wonderful, and they’re stealing it. Can you believe that? We’re going to be looking very strongly at the bourgeoisie, what they’re up to

He's the easiest play in the world. You don't need some Karla-esque genius spymaster pulling strings to manipulate him - one compliment and he'll eat out of your hand.

Could get used to this waking-up-to-see-Australia-getting-skittled thing. Sets the day up nicely.

STOKESY

RIP Mani. You died on the right side of history like so many dont. Massive talent, top red.

Mad how Trump's malignant narcissism allows him to attack people for their appearance when he looks, well, like he does. An example of his brazen shamelessness. Or rampant projection. Who can tell?

Mani was a great man: warm, funny, self-deprecating at the right moments, and a profoundly talented bass player, born to do it. This is awful news

You couldn't really not bump into Mani if you went to the match with any kind of regularity In The Trafford a while before the reunion gigs, I said they could be as shit as they like on the Friday, I was going on the Saturday He said WE'LL BE SHIT BOTH NIIIGHTS in his voice like gravel in a mixer

Unbelievably shite news about Mani. Always seemed a superb bloke.

this thread is unbelievable

Donald Trump is gunning for the BBC, and Farage is cheering him on. Want to know why? Follow the money…

On Labour MPs in a dark place. Featuring King Lear. www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...

Why waste a bullet when he'd likely be dying onstage anyway thanks to his knackered fucking shtick?

Football. Bloody hell.

This is absolutely fucking scenes football.

Scotland should just get it forward and play off the seconds as the tiki taka approach isn’t getting them anywhere.

Looks outside the box to me.

"Insubordinate" gives away the game -- his autocratic desire to be an unaccountable, all powerful monarch in an off-the-rack Brioni suit. Zero doubt in my mind that Trump would murder journalists if he could, like his paymaster sitting next to him.

Think going to Edinburgh at the weekend has activated my dormant Jock genes. Grandad’s from there you see. Also had my first haggis experience Friday night and it’s changed my life. Anyway, basically saying I hope Scotland manage this tonight ✊🏻

you don't have to embarrass our guest by asking if he had someone killed and hacked to pieces

McT has taken the absolute piss there.

In which @owenjones.bsky.social carefully and irresistibly unpicks the sadistic, intellectually dishonest and politically self-defeating policies of Shabana Mahmood. www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...

This is beyond fascinating. The most interesting article I've read this year easy I reckon. www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v4...