DOGS [being raptured without her]: we never liked you, Kristy

when you're the frequent flyer / flightaware freak in your marriage and your spouse is flying without you

THEY ARE INEVITABLE

THEY’RE COMING

they’re coming

I am not a gambler, but I'm feeling pretty confident in this addled racist oaf changing parties in the next 18 months, and giving some bullshit statement about "I didn't leave the party, the party left me"

New Action Cookbook Newsletter! The days are just packed, but I'm living for Saturday morning. Today, we discuss: - ideal breakfast sandwiches! - cocktails made from gross weird snacks! - what to listen, watch + read this weekend! - a horse with a Labubu? www.actioncookbook.com/whats-your-i...

IN CASE OF METHODISTS HIDE DOWNSTAIRS

I had a Samsung smart TV for exactly one day before I rushed that shit back to the store. It was basically an ad kiosk in my living room.

folks: the Cleveland Guardians.

a midweek day off school bracketed by a Spirit Week is a real power move from my kids' school, I'm not even mad (I'm extremely mad)

If you let a photographer talk you into an Alliance of Magicians shot then I don't trust you to win elections

the real CLT test is if you can make a 12-minute connection between terminal B and E after sitting on the tarmac for 45 minutes

when Sidney Poitier died in 2022, I wrote about how "Sneakers" is one of my favorite movies of all time-and holds up terrifically well for a 30+ year-old techno-thriller. with Robert Redford's passing, I am again imploring you to watch this perfect movie: www.actioncookbook.com/you-guysll-b...

New Action Cookbook Newsletter! "Taking a Child to a Football Game: An Incomplete Diary" (free post today!) www.actioncookbook.com/taking-a-chi...

This is a great time for me to re-up my story from earlier this summer about stone-skipping, which features my good friend, the new world champion (mentioned in this article, and not one of the people implicated in any wrongdoing) www.actioncookbook.com/a-stones-thr...

logged into LinkedIn just long enough to see multiple people congratulating a former coworker on a work anniversary (they died almost a decade ago) and that's enough linkedin for this month

I don’t understand the Emmys at all but it seems unfair that they can nominate the Oscars for an award and then not give it to them

as a parent of grade schoolers, I can’t convey to you how much this video means to me.

With Brent Pry on the way out, one name I’m hearing a lot of buzz around for Virginia Tech is former Appalachian State head coach Scott Satterfield

Gotta expect UCLA to move fast on a rising star in the coaching ranks—Cincinnati’s Scott Satterfield

gotta figure results like this are going to have blue-blood programs looking to poach up-and-coming coaching star Scott Satterfield

Cats by 90

My dad first signed up for Twitter to follow live sports and he’s a freak about U of I. One day he said to me “Twitter is abuzz about Illini golf,” and I was like dude you only follow Illini sports accounts. And that’s how every reporter feels Charlie Kirk was the most important person in the world.

New Action Cookbook Newsletter! It's Friday, and I'm here to defend the good name of slop. Today, I've got: -progress in the war between my kids and seasoning! -a spiced-up Sloppy Joe! -a smoothed-down cocktail! -books, music, pets + more! Let's slop it up. www.actioncookbook.com/you-give-slo...

I wrote this four years ago, and I still feel it today: www.actioncookbook.com/they-dont-re...

TIRED: “you can nail Trump, but it might get Clinton, too!” WIRED: “you can nail Trump and Clinton, too!”

I say this as someone whose favorite podcast hosts have read sports gambling ads (and thankfully no longer do): we are going to have a hard time reckoning with how many people we like helped advance the sports gambling epidemic after it's destroyed innumerable lives bsky.app/profile/mbkp...

New Action Cookbook Newsletter! Please ride along with me as I clean out my refrigerator and think thing like "when did I buy organic ketchup?" and "am I a monster??" www.actioncookbook.com/things-i-tho...

they will have to do so in open defiance of the law, which I trust the cited example will have no issue with

the experience in the stadium and on-campus should supersede the television viewing experience and absolutism is the only way to get it back.

I am going to run for office on a platform of "all college football games shall be played at 2:30pm local time on Saturday" and I will not listen to any counterarguments or exceptions no, not even whatever one you've just thought of

as much as I enjoy "old guy still playing professional sports" content it's troubling when I realize Matt Prater is still younger than me I need Rich Hill back in MLB again

New Action Cookbook Newsletter! Please ride along with me as I clean out my refrigerator and think thing like "when did I buy organic ketchup?" and "am I a monster??" www.actioncookbook.com/things-i-tho...

Florida needs a coach who can win against in-state opponents. Someone like Cincinnati’s Scott Satterfield

[Werner Herzog at a Bowling Green football game voice] I would like to see the cat

am I gonna shit my pants later? Friends, that’s a—

in this house, we abide no hatred (except on gamedays)

I appreciate when a movie throws in a few lines of dialogue that’s not critical to the plot but explains away one actor’s accent so they don’t have to try as hard to hide it

PR REP: hey, I'm cold-emailing you about an announcement my client has to make, but I can't tell you what it is unless you agree to an embargo first ME: okay good I am not interested at all PR REP: wait

New Action Cookbook Newsletter! School's back in session, and it's time for some show and tell. Today, I've got: - Dumb food, kid edition! - A cocktail sequel! - Great music/book recs! - Talk of minor league baseball + personal culture! - Dogs, cats + more! www.actioncookbook.com/schools-back...

I know this is killjoy behavior but every post I see speculating on the imminent death of a certain public figure feels exactly the same as all the times we breathlessly waited for Robert Mueller or the 25th amendment or whatever to save us last time it is not happening

so what if the reason they aren't letting Trump talk is that he had a Fetterman stroke and now he is woke

go TinCaps

Have to figure that Bama boosters are getting itchy to get DeBoer out, and one name I’m hearing a lot of buzz around if they do is Cincinnati’s Scott Satterfield

It takes a very specific kind of extremely good weather to find yourself thinking “you know, northern Indiana is actually kind of pretty…”

boiler up

Meghan Markle said Rachel Ray's 30-minute meals really got her into cooking. Just like @actioncookbook.com! They're practically the same person.

New Action Cookbook Newsletter! Football season is upon us, and it's a new season at the ACBN, too. (I'm on Ghost now!) To celebrate, today's newsletter is free to all, and includes: -a gameday dip! -an eye-opening cocktail! -book/music/podcast recs! -more! www.actioncookbook.com/its-a-brand-...