Over at @somewordslit.bsky.social, I just published my first poem after a seven year hiatus 😅 It’s about my son & Patrick Mahomes’ knee & about how the Super Bowl sucks this year. It’d mean a lot to me if y’all checked it out 💞

I sold no books. Anyone want to buy a signed copy of Brazos? $20, shipping included, shoot me a DM so I don’t have to put these all back on the bookshelf.

Callum loves to sit & stare at the tree, & he had to show it to his pig 🥹

I let my almost one-year-old make his own tiers lineup this morning… I feel like he’s made some choices here, but will almost certainly do better than me. 😅

I wrote about Cam Ward & what it means to see someone from your hometown succeed in college football. fansided.com/fan-voices-c...

catching up on house of villains & like……….. how do u eliminate kandy while larsa’s dumb ass is still there 💀 such bad production 💀

Just asked my dad why he isn’t constantly looking up for UFOs. He said “‘cause I work so much, the only time I go outside, I’m takin’ my dog to shit.” HOW DO WE BRING UAPs TO THE PROLETARIAT

would be pretty funny if luigi mangione was the wrong guy they picked up after the CEO assassin look alike contest

My 11-month-old has this fit. It’s from Carter’s.

Thou shalt not forget that all Americans are united by how much they hate the greed of healthcare insurance companies.

Posted on Twitter but also posting here because you have fewer followers on here: Hi @poptartsbowl.bsky.social. My son was born during you last year. I wrote a poem about it. It’d be cool if you published it.

am i gonna pass out before the end of this game

All about the women this year… & Tech, as always lmfao 💘

Today is the last day to buy my book at a discount so if you’ve been thinking “I need more books,” here is a chance to get more books.

Do any of y’all (especially anyone else who has autism or SPD!) use Loop ear plugs? Trying to decide whether they’re worth the money or not…

The Chiefs have the best QB ever, the fastest WR ever, the most famous TE ever, and a pretty good defense. They are terrible (11-1)

Marty Schottenheimer smiling from beyond waiting for the Raiders to Raiders themselves

Never a doubt. (there was huge doubt) #ChiefsKingdom

Have to give the Chiefs scriptwriters credit. These endings each week are deranged

it is so fun to be a fan of this team

A franchise leader in more ways than one. Congrats on another milestone, Pat!Patrick! #ChiefsKingdom #NFL

He's 29 years old. It's easy to be swept up in the game-to-game analysis and to be perpetually looking ahead to the playoff run, but we cannot forget that we're watching something absolutely incredible every week.

I misheard Al Roker on the parade and thought he said “And here’s the Mulholland Drive balloon!” and now I am wondering what that would even be.

So, uh, is anyone else on #UFOsky wondering if we’re currently witnessing catastrophic disclosure?? Just wondering because… damn.

This is what demographic panic looks like. When people are this uninformed, democracy faces serious headwinds. from @jvl.bsky.social

minshew, ridder, o'connell.. don't matter, chiefs by 1

Post a non-religious photo you think of as holy…

Matt Gaetz has now removed more criminal insurrectionists from Congress in 1 day than Merrick Garland did in 4 years.

god i can’t take hearing about every little thing trump says and does for a second time. every crass remark and poorly conceived policy gets so so so so so much fucking airtime

This is very millennial of me, but multiple times this week, I’ve said “I wish Leslie Jordan was here.”

Losing to UNI isn't good but I don't think it necessarily says too much about Iowa State because weird things just kind of happen when Iowa teams play Iowa teams.

Sports Bluesky! Quote w/your favorite teams & introduce yourself… NBA: Bulls (nostalgia, man) NFL: CHIEFS ❤️💛 NHL: Ehh NCAA: Duke 🏀, Iowa 🏈 MLB: Red Sox, Royals (highly casual) WNBA: Fever, Wings Soccer: Denmark, Iceland + gymnastics, horse racing, & if you consider esports sports, Geoguessr

My 11-month-old son & I have a crush on the same person. I don’t even know anymore.

Just keeping the trend alive 😉

Thank you Mahomes for the reminder!

Oh hey, if anyone on this app would like to do something with my book, hit me up. Review it? Teach it & have me Zoom into their class? Have me come read from it within driving distance of Des Moines? Do an online reading? Have me on a podcast? Something else??? bellepointpress.com/products/bra...

10 shows to get to know me: The X-Files, Hannibal, Bob’s Burgers, Broad City, The L Word, Drag Race, The League, Always Sunny, Sex & the City, Dead To Me, Trailer Park Boys, What We Do In The Shadows *Yes, this is 12. I couldn’t choose.

Just mind-blown all around by what we let happen there…

“As Cook absolutely BLASTED his back side” Yo? 😂

Gray ja vu! Another td for noah!

I poured the first one in a glass. Might have to go straight bottle from here on out if we don’t REMEMBER HOW TO PLAY OFFENSE, GODDAMN

Chiefs offense has no identity. Are we going ground and pound with opportunistic passing? Then Kareem needs more than 11 carries going into 4th. If we are a passing team, we need to learn to pass block worth anything. The fact that it feels like 21 points is our ceiling today is sad.

That's what your girl said to you last night

What a great drive for Blueskyavier Williams.

Noah Gray, I’m sorry for always underestimating you simply because you have a douchey Gen Z-er’s name.

Andy’s lucky that one worked 🤦🏻‍♀️

WE ARE SO BACK