SEXY DATE: What would you say if I told you I wasn’t wearing any panties underneath this dress? GUY WHO MISINTERPRETS AROUSAL AS ANGER: That really pisses me off.

My uncle, who works for Nintendo, said this is not true and in fact Link will be dressed in the outfits from my uncle’s extremely graphic fan-art

My deli guy opened up a whole restaurant. Sf is a wonderful place

I’m on work day 7 of 9 and I’m gonna lose it.

no amount of state propaganda will ever convince me this man is my enemy

Person who’s only ever seen the 90s sitcom Dinosaurs watching Prehistoric Planet: ”So none of them have a fucking job??”

brain: kool keith voice - "switch hitter. pinch shitter. xanadu's pussy opened up, it was covered in glitter. king's quest cat-taurs ovulating as i walk by, they want a litter" me: king's quest wouldn't be referenced by kool keith. closest would be del, but he's a sega boy, not sierra. brain: fuck

Bunch of Volvo engineers in the 80s: like as a joke it should be huge right? Like a 25mm drain bolt. Just big as fuck. Oil comes crashing out you’re worried you broke something. That’d be so funny

Well... he found your keys 🦁

Once more I am working nine days in a row for no reason other than “this is an all hands sale event”

A movie you’ve seen more than seven times with a gif

Telling everyone dressed as Patrick Bateman that I love their reviewbruh cosplay

Hands hurt.

My oven doesn’t work and I’m dying for cookies. I’d even take a sugar cookie at this point

Bring her back was so much more than I thought I’d get

I hate customers cars man. Whole thing stinks like lasagna

Unpopular opinion: protest frog is peak liberal dogshit. None of this is funny.

The presidio free shuttle kicks ass. I’m so scared this dude has no fear

Passing by where Charmed was filmed

The AI bubble is getting too big you say? It keeps inflating? And… and now it’s… big and round…. And it’s going to …pop? 👉👈

how to deactivate torment nexus torment nexus deactivation tutorial torment nexus deactivation tutorial working 2025 deactivate torment nexus no survey

Alright we’re back. I forgot love existed

I am having a rough one chat

My final wish is to beat a Chrysler engineer to death with my hands

Fuck dude

Someone save me from my swelteringly hot work. This blows. I’m not meant for this

I’ve gotten to the “this sucks and my dream sucked” part of chasing a dream job and Im so tired of this shit dude

Now that Alex Jones is dead can I call myself “the tip of the spear”

This is the best they got for 2028. Whole party fucked like a duck on a fuck farm

I think legally I am allowed to find it kinda funny

The MSNBC commentator saying that most political violence has historically come from the left just once again showed how we suffer from failing to learn history. Lynching, pogroms, race riots, the political violence that ended Reconstruction, and against the Civil Rights Movement. Come on.

No way charlie Kirk got a neck shot during a speech

woof!

Man I dunno if I can do this anymore

And every shitass time we have this stupid “all hands” sales event all the coworkers get pizza and 4 times a year I hear “damn that’s right you don’t eat this” or “we’ll get you something” and it’s like Doritos

On day 5 out of 9 days worked straight and this’ll be the third time I’ve had this in the last month and I’m kinda just over it

Hey. I don't need to see any more general reminders that Republicans are bad. I'm good on that, thanks. The science is in. We have a ruling. I know it's tempting to keep staring into the abyss, but maybe find something to do with your hands other than wringing them.

Best part of that unknown number documentary is the B roll and how close to War of the Worlds it was.

How many things can you add to Mac and cheese before it becomes a casserole. I say no more than 2

13 mile hike complete. Tomorrow I do the opposite

6/13 miles a little reward.

A jury of my peers? TWELVE murderers?!

Telling my partner he can’t only have edibles with the pup hood on but taking them away again cause they’re chocolate

I think they should give dogs guns