Making 3 trips to the same grocery store because you keep forgetting an item

LRS: Contreras did everything the Cardinals asked him to do. Even the insanely stupid shit (being asked to moveto the outfield). Hope he does well in Boston

@JeffPassan tweeted BREAKING: The Boston Red Sox are acquiring first baseman Willson Contreras in a trade with the St. Louis Cardinals, sources tell ESPN.

It sounds like they were just told a data center is being built nearby

The playoff was a huge mistake, go back to the BCS

Oh gosh things are that bad at Meta, huh?

I want to go back to not knowing anything about Adin Ross

I’ll admit it. I had no idea Susie Wiles was Pat Summerall’s daughter

A better baseball podcast would discuss how depressing it is that these players are even available for trade

When that day comes, it is going to be incredible

Fuck

Willson Contreras had just over 50 innings of major league experience at 1st base from 2016-2024 and posted a -1 DRS in over 1,000 innings in 2025. It really isn’t that hard

Bolting 3 days after a private equity partnership sure seems coincidental

People with the last names Belichick and Lombardi now make up 31% of the UNC football coaching staff.

Are you ok with these things that are already happening?!?!?

“R U ok with having to see a primary care doc before you can see a specialist ?” Man what country do you live in?

Lol

Lane2Michigan

Oh my god

”Pat McAfee went to your campus because of us” is just another reason to fuck Notre Dame over

Incredible use of the word “partner”. How much of that NBC money gets distributed to the rest of the ACC?

The Disneyland Christmas special that I’m watching with my 5 year old includes Good Charlotte covering Fairytale of New York

While I do think this is very much a natural result of making the playoff the end all be all, this is Notre Dame doing it so I must react accordingly: LOL stupid babies

I know everyone hated Dennis Miller but “they don’t need a football they need a baton” is pretty good

lol join a conference nerds

Feel like refusing to play in a conference title game would actually make it much easier to not include them in the CFP

Why run that 3rd down play if you’re not going for it on 4th?

We’re gonna burn our money in this pit now for a little bit

Dr. Spaceman procedure

Commentary: I’d Sooner Let My Family Starve Than Exaggerate My Marketing  Experience On My Resume https://theonion.com/id-sooner-let-my-family-starve-than-exaggerate-my-marketing-experience-on-my-resume/

Ft Zumwalt West hosting group play games in the summer

Pictured: my dodgers fan college roommate to me after Ryan Franklin’s blown save in 2009 NLDS

Guessing this reader isn‘t paying attention to the rhetoric surrounding the NBA

The meanest thing I can say about Valhalla is that it made being a Viking seem boring

It is very funny that the ACC is being thrown into upheaval because a team from Texas is losing to a team from California

Missouri football should be mocked if they let Bobby Petrino win his last game as head coach against them

I don’t understand how Michigan won 9 games this year

I think it’s really important for Ohio State to remember that they have stronger, faster, and better players than Michigan

Weird how Kirk isn’t considering the players at all

The outgained Ohio State by 200 yards stat is my favorite because it is both incorrect and funny!

Bobby reading the alt text

I love getting mad about the portal during a game that involves Lane Kiffin

My five year old saw the cell phone as where Kevin Hart is an elf and thought it was the funniest thing. Biggest failure as a parent

Chaim opening up the windows and letting that Mo stink out

Pete Hegseth angrily tweeting and asking why Captain Kelly has two of each medal

I don’t know what the plot of Frozen 3 is going to be but it better maintain the core theme of Elsa wanting to be left the fuck alone