Just found out that this piece of childhood magic (Chuckie Egg) was written by a 15-year-old! I am both very impressed with his achievement and very disappointed with 15-year-old me.

The warning signs are there. The alarm bells are ringing. Get Palantir out.

‘Did you order the appointment of the Prince of Darkness as ambassador, Prime Minister?’ ‘Knowing his dodgy history, which should have already excluded him, did you purposefully not ask if he failed vetting?’ ‘Well, did you?…’ (Wait for it… wait…) “You can’t Mandelson the truth” (No *you’re* 5)

Just found out that this piece of childhood magic (Chuckie Egg) was written by a 15-year-old! I am both very impressed with his achievement and very disappointed with 15-year-old me.

The warning signs are there. The alarm bells are ringing. Get Palantir out.

Remembering Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II, born on this day, one hundred years ago.

I can’t uncurl my toes. This is incredible. 😂

Absolutely incredible. NASA Astronaut Reid Wiseman, who commanded Artemis II, took this footage from the far side of the Moon with his iPhone. Watch with sound on.

Morris has been immense today. And it’s the best I’ve seen Strelec play in a long time. #boro #utb

BlueSky is going to post us all a CD-ROM at this rate.

BlueSky is going to post us all a CD-ROM at this rate.

Former immigrant to the US, Sharon Osbourne, is going on an anti-immigration rally to ‘save the yooo kay’ organised by Stephen Yaxley-Lennon (Tommy Robinson) who is himself an immigrant living in Spain. Outstanding levels of hypocrisy. They think we’re mugs.

Sharon Osbourne went from ‘I do not condone racism, misogyny or bullying’ in 2021 to marching with Tommy Robinson in 2026.

JD Vance certainly has some touch. 😂 The Curb Your Enthusiasm theme just follows him around.

Viktor? nah. Loser Orban. Bravo Hungary. 🥳🇭🇺

FFS #utb #boro

I repeat: As well as writing a cracking song, every member of A-ha would have made a great vampire in The Lost Boys.

"You can't hear an image." The image:

What have we become?

Threatening war crimes is an immediate disqualification, not a “oops” you can cancel out with a 14-day truce. He’s volatile, he’s dangerous, and he’s unfit to continue. Remove him.

Nowt good about this Friday. #utb #boro

Sloppy play. Unforced errors. Missed chances and an ex-Boro player coming back to bite us on the backside in an important game. Can’t get more typical Boro than that. #boro #utb

Hate football. #boro #utb

Oof Italy. Congratulations Bosnia and Herzegovina. #worldcup

Israel is now the only country in the world to have the death penalty reserved for — and specifically targeting — one ethnic group. Yet another flagrant breach of international law. In a long history of breaches. Apartheid state. People can’t say they don’t know now. Neither can our government.

This is Apartheid. It's morally disgusting - and comes at the same time as Israel is committing an ongoing genocide. To see the Labour Government defend Israel repeatedly will horrify the British public - it cannot go on like this.

Can’t trust thieves, even when they have a break. #kitkat

Is this ‘longstanding policy’ in the room with us now #bbcqt?

Chinny reckon. #bbcqt

Naturally beer-soaked 70s novelty ashtray Nigel Farage is nowhere to be seen in Clacton tonight. Is it to avoid constituents complaining that he’s done nothing for them? Or chastising him about never being there? Or is he worried about them asking where the £885k house cash came from? #bbcqt

Outstanding 😂👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

Comedy is all about timing. #pmqs

Comedy is all about timing. #pmqs

Munya Chawawa on the pathetic grifters exposed in Louis Theroux’s ‘manosphere’ documentary on Netflix. No notes. Brilliant. 😂😂😂

The President who formerly claimed that he was the one who had forced Netanyahu’s hand (after Rubio let slip that Bibi had forced Trump’s) now makes it clear that Israel is, in fact, in the driving seat.

When questioned by Anna Foster on #r4today Alex Gandler, spokesperson for the Israeli Embassy to the UK, is either chuckling at bombing civilian infrastructure (South Pars gasfield) in Iran or chuckling at the fact Israel didn’t tell the US it was going to do it. Neither a good sign. Rogue state.

IYKYK 😂

#utb #boro

Keep up the good work, Stoke. Derby, pull your finger out. Wrexham and Hull just make it a draw lads. Ta. #utb #boro

What a lovely, funny and moving film ‘I Swear’ is. Maxine Peake, Shirley Henderson and Peter Mullen are excellent. But Robert Aramayo and the young lad Scott Ellis Watson who both play John Davidson, genuinely outstanding.

Just realised Kim Hellberg is being interviewed on BBC Tees right now. You can listen to it from the beginning on BBC Sounds. #utb #boro

Important three points after the past few games. Fry and Targett were immense. And Strelec getting on the score sheet is very encouraging. #utb #boro

Bit harsh to take Strelec off straight after he scored that header, mind. #utb #boro

Matt Targett, you beauty! 🔥 #utb #boro

In January 1934, the Daily Mail published the notorious headline “Hurrah for the Blackshirts” written by owner Lord Rothermere to support Oswald Mosley and the British Union of Fascists. It hasn’t changed.

As journalists working today many of us are taught to recognise disinformation when we see it and fight back against it. Unfortunately there are some who willingly seek it out and put it on their front pages. A disgrace to the profession.

Just naked racism from Farage and the Mail. Only British and commonwealth citizens are allowed to vote. It's not 'stealing' to legally take part in your own country's elections

Ah, hope. There you are. Huge congratulations to Hannah Spencer, the Green Party and the good folk of Gorton and Denton. I hope other parties and the wider electorate take note. You don’t have to dance to Farage’s hateful divisive tune. We can do so much better. We can be so much better.