I’m not disappointed. I’m just angry. - Mom

Describe your cat’s personality with one photo.

I may have misheard but I hope I didn’t: There is a horse working at Disneyland whose name is Perp.

Whenever people complain about the number of folks relying on food stamps, it is worth reminding them that SNAP is, by too large of a degree, a subsidy for corporations that refuse to pay a living wage and their political allies who reject public policy prescriptions to reduce income inequality.

CHILD: Are you Zack and Cody’s Mom? ME (conspiratorially): It’s my Halloween costume. Good, right?

HUSBAND: Hey, babe? Any reason the garage door is still open? ME: *deer in headlights* uhhhhhhh… I had…. Uhhhh… I had a… had aaaaa HUSBAND: Side quest? ME: YES! I love him so much.

I love how no one is accusing me of stealing Napoleon’s jewels, but when 22 tons of cheese went missing, I got alllllllll the side-eye. You really do know me.

Autism is not just about being "quirky," and those who claim otherwise should not be taken seriously as autism advocates, org representatives, by the media—or by anyone who wants to truly support autistic people. From @epballou.bsky.social via TPGA archives: thinkingautismguide.com/2018/05/auti...

No Kings! Only Timelords. A thread for people wondering if they would enjoy the inflatable-costume-at-a-protest:

I’m not really a live-skeeter. But I had to stop my frog dance to tell you that there is a deafening amount of honking coming from big ol lifted trucks here in my tiny town.

Today’s reason to like humans:

Black Bloc: - Immediate target - you look like feds - 10% of you are feds Frog Bloc: - feds don't know where to shoot you - deflection perimeter for less lethal rounds - your respirator and body armor are hidden - even if you are a fed, you're still a dancing frog

My boss: so how's our fourth quarter looking? Me, the sales manager at the company that makes inflatable frog suits: well, you're never going to believe this, but

I am old, tired and jaded. I gave up my place to those younger and better equipped, I told myself. So why did I just buy an inflatable frog costume?

And now we only eat guitars! HAPPY RAPTURE, EVERYONE!

Was it abandoned or did it escape to follow its big dreams? Either way, I love where I live.

Greg the Bunny.

Shoutout to all the NFL people posting on Bluesky. All you mfers posting clips and graphs and telling us about groin injuries are doing the work of kings.

Your social circle sapphic needs to be informed of this

Hi. Yes, the world is in flames. This is your reminder not to preheat your air fryer with the liner in the basket or those flames are gonna be literal.

They don’t have an account here, but I still wanted to share.

Sorry I stabbed your jelly orb. My mitochondria are pretty challenged. Waddya gonna do? 🤷🏼‍♀️

Derek Walcott

I give good promo, in my opinion.

Are you looking for a sense of community and camaraderie? Garden supply at 7:30 AM. Gender, politics,color… none of it matters in the face of irrigation hardware and locating the cheap mulch.

World is a bit of a shitshow. I’m finding joy where I can. I HELD A MARMOSET YESTERDAY!

My loves! We've made it through an entire decade of bucking the norm and being Wayward AF. So glad to have been on this journey with you! We're celebrating with these tees if you want to adorn your outsides, but even if not, you'll always have that strength inside you. shopstands.com/collections/...

A few years ago, I moved to a teensy, tiny town. I am currently alone in NY. I shall probably be regaling you with my musings for a some days.

I’m fascinated at watching myself in real time see a headline, assume it’s The Truth, feel defeated, decide to give up, and then have a tiny spark that is getting larger and larger every time this happens shout, “NOPE! NOPE! WAIT A MINUTE…. At some point it will quit having any power over me.

Here is my most recent experience with AI.

*HERD

Two young lads were next to me on the plane. One told the other, “Oh yeah. It’s easy to tear someone’s finger off.” I need you to applaud that I did not turn to them slowly and say, “In fact, it is not,” then return to my reading material.

“Ah. This item pertains to a recent question in a conversation! I’m sure everyone else has been pondering it as frequently as I have! I shall share my illuminating information so no one is confused!” *proceeds to confuse literally everyone.

My friend spent the evening amusing me by designing 80’s mashup shirts. If they amuse you too, support an independent artist…. damondesign.printful.me

My horoscope told me I was about to enter my final form. And, lo, the world rises to meet me.

“And to CELEBRATE? Let’s have GLADIATOR FIGHTS ON THE FRONT LAWN!!!” JFC.

I’m so chaotic good it happens even when I’m not there.

All of my brilliant political commentary that could save the world is stifled and muted because, over on IG, Tiny Chef found out his show was cancelled and he cried and I cried and now I need chocolate. You’re on your own.

I don’t want to dishearten anyone, but I turned 56 last weekend and today I got super excited about a dress I found at Costco.

I was listening to an EMT talk today at the gym and, muscles aside, I think people truly underestimate how “alpha energy” compassion is. Oooooh, you run a hedge fund? Lightweight. Have you ever had to hold a guy’s foot on to his leg while making sure his dog lived? Then GTFO.

Breaking: The Trevor Project received a stop-work order last night on its contract with the national 988 suicide prevention hotline. The Trump administration is eliminating the option for LGBTQ callers to the hotline to press 3 and connect with someone who specializes in LGBTQ mental health.

Thank you @adampknave.com for the introduction to @matthewdowsmith.bsky.social He created this glorious portrait of Greg for a mere $150. I truly recommend his work.

Had such a fun time with Betts, @kimrhodes.bsky.social, and Briana talking about the SPN episode/pilot we helped create, Wayward Sisters. Such a wonderful time that I miss so much. Check it out for behind the scenes tidbits (and lots of space vagina jokes): season14podcast.libsyn.com/1310-wayward...

I don’t think I’ve ever gone from knowing absolutely nothing about someone to I WILL TAKE A BULLET FOR HIM faster than I just did with JJ Spaun. (I would like to clarify, it would be a non-lethal shot to a major muscle. But still.)

For Father’s Day, I’d like to share a classic quote from my Dad with no context: “I gotta hand it to that spotty fella, though. He got his leg strapped on, got down here, put the fire out ‘fore there was hardly any damage. I’d make him dinner but it’d have to be soup cuz he’s only got one tooth.”

And sometimes I channel Gene Kelly.

Dear @scalzi.com, I cherish this gift, but may I please have a little exemption for my birthday?

Great. Well now “run him like an asset” is painting itself in my mind.

This is not just awesome to know in general, but also awesome to imagine what a Top Quark would look like. A jaunty pose? A strap on? Anything is possible.

More farm content for those not on the Gram. This is Greg. He is the best goat in the whole wide world.