Its good that a third of the infra that runs everything internet related is owned by one guy and hes evil right? Future societies will talk about how smart we were for doing that right

If trump had hired independent animators for the jet shit vid i guess i would've supported it more

My dog park friend (40s, park slope) said she hoped ******** **** gets hit by a bus and dragged

I used to be even farther left and would have written mamdani off for some of the things hes said but my perspective has changed and im really rooting for him. That said it would dangerous for there to be no pressure moving him left at all. I take those opinions seriously even though i don't agree

saw this clip of the NYC mayor debate and i had tears in my eyes, perhaps the most insane section of any debate ever

Bravoholics for zohran mamdani forever. I will change my username when it stops being true

Trying to organize a Predator movie marathon with my friends and running into a lot of awkward naming issues. This must be a big problem at Predator HQ

We have way worse problems atp but nobody knows the difference between "complementary" and "complimentary" anymore

Mindfulness has not been working on me i Must be in my bed in the next 5 min or ill lose my gds (god damn shit)

if elected mayor zoltar mandandy is going to put all of the police in jail, according to a blog post we did.

NYPD is like a giant club of everyones most racist aunts and uncles. It's miraculous that they manage this while being racially diverse but yknow, the marvels of racism!

Im going to believe Katy perry is dating justin trudeau because of the thing in Everything Everywhere All At Once where you have to do something really weird to try and get to an alternate universe

Love is Blind drop 2 viewings are now

I stand by this I loved my deranged lime green queen at the reunion #rhom

My first thought was “wow I hope this guy didn’t give out his name because he could absolutely be charged” and yup, he is correct to stay anonymous. This man’s account is shocking. His neighbors’ situation is shocking. The entire Chicago raid is shocking.

A friend misremembered my chronic disease and didn't invite me to run his company 5K as a result even though i could totally run it and i said no thats just fine

I like the stephanie larsa friendship heheh #rhom

Chi ossé's social media team if you are reading this, i nolifed canvassing until zohran got the nom and i will do the same for chi ossé. I will doorknock for him until my knuckles bleed. Please get rid of hakeem jeffries i hate that fucking twerp so much

He heard the chi ossé rumors and got nervous

Heard a male podcaster joking about how gross it is to have underwear thats older than 5 years old so im going to jail sadly

NY loves Tish James!!!!!

My business is felling #rhoslc

Personally I would rather fight over day old crab rangoon than fight over craig but this season looks great ❤️

Yassss Wope II

EVERYONE: come to Mastodon, it's so easy and fun now! ME:

:/ do yall see it also or

The time i went to a random bushwick art show and it featured noel de lesseps

*licks finger, holds it up to the breeze* the record execs and shareholders. They're getting trump heebie jeebies. The winds are changing

Teaching my baby nephew (1 week old) about mewing and looksmaxxing

Met a cuddly wiener dog on the subway and got distracted and missed my stop and therefore almost missed my train to boston to meet my new baby nephew omg

BABY! Where the hell is my husband! - me continuously for 48 hours straight (idk the other words)

Its crazy how little i have thought about travis kelces wiener. Even now after naming it, i have not directly tried to imagine it, and i expect i never will. I absolutely can't fathom writing a song about it

My chihuahua is enticed by the warm oven whenever i open it and we have to hold him back

I said what I said.

I haven't been watching this season of #rhoc bc i spidey sensed how the dynamics would be with Katie based on the trailer and didnt want to see that And the little snippets of emily simpson that are making it into my very filtered corners of the internet are further affirming that decision!l

Aaaaand thats why ive been off meta for months

My bf put a shared appointment on our google calendar for a date in several Saturdays from now and won't tell me who it is. Im starting an unethical sports betting style pool on whether hes proposing

This didn't work for the real housewives of orange county and it wont work for these dipshits

This is some disney wicked stepmother bullshit. Can you imagine a woman pres being this hellbent on a fucking ballroom

Who is madelaine petsch in this world

Well reporting in for cis women its also not us so I'm starting to get very nervous

Insomnia hours who up thinking with they brain

Its crazy that all the cancel culture comedians are performing for saudi princes and its the late night hosts (the jimmys, even!!!) who are actually speaking truth to power

Hundreds of thousands of stasi agents won’t even get paid. Are you happy now libs? Not so funny when the secret police have to work for free

I can tell the world is nearing a breaking point bc all the user feedback I read now is pure sephirothposting

I just screamed aloud and smacked my thigh in rage (died on hades run) and my dog came over to check on me 😭

Here's my evening (feel free to copy): - tiny bit stoned - cup of tiramisu from pizza place - bath in freshly cleaned bathroom - rhoslc on ipad and playing solitaire on my phone

Chuck and Hakeem aren’t even in the same building with us. No chance of them reading the room we’re in.

Very funny list thank you