Got a couple full sets sent off today. Still a fair number of everything left. I thought I had a few of the out of print ones too someplace, but they haven't turned up yet. If they do I'll post those too.

really went dark for the sequel

We’re turning lemons into steeply discounted books. Moving forward, we’ll resell returned copies for $13 flat, allowing us to recoup costs without counting returns against royalties. malarkeybooks.com/store/returns

Doing this again for a few days. Hit me up if you want a book. Pay whatever, we're clearing them out.

Write a detective novel in which Paula Cole receives an anonymous letter suggesting she look for the missing cowboys in the yard of the woman with the milkshake.

Did they ever actually make trash bags like this? That’d be cool.

Been real slow lately but we’re putting a couple books and a tote bag in the mail tomorrow. We can send you books and stuff. We would love actually! Malarkeybooks.com/store

Write a psychological thriller in which no one thought to bring stuffing this year and now you must endure a stuffing-less holiday gathering.

Remake Thelma and Louise with the pardoned turkeys.

Write a romance novel in which gravy spreads item by item until each dish on the plate gets a taste.

Write a novel in which green bean casserole fires its publicist only to find that its stardom was only ever a construct as mashed potatoes once again finds the spotlight.

Write a prequel detailing the many, many crimes of which the turkeys are now being pardoned.

New episode of Comic Strip out today at Farewell Transmission.

New episode of Comic Strip out today at Farewell Transmission.

Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right, here I am, rock you like a hurricane

Pitch a Super Mario game where he's just doing a day of plumbing.

Pitch an American Pie sequel in which the original pie returns and sues Jason Biggs over paternity.

Wish there was a song about what the lion is doing tonight in the jungle, the mighty jungle.

We have about five tote bags left, don’t know that we’ll ever get more. Snag one while you can! malarkeybooks.com/store/bag

Write a tell all revealing Kenneth actually knew the frequency the whole time.

Write a tell all in which Cheers reveals its theme song is describing Starbucks.

Write a dystopian novel in which the mint ceases production of the penny in order to limit the citizenry's luck.

Write a dystopian novel in which the mint ceases production of the penny in order to limit the citizenry's luck.

Yesterday was the 20 year anniversary of my brother-in-law somehow surviving this.

The One Ring poem is singable to the tune of Yankee Doodle Dandy.

Who wants to buy some cursed-ass steamer trunks?

lego should make a lament configuration set

Found two short stories in a notebook from God knows when that never got typed up. Get ready for incoming submissions.

Posting my Kroger Fuel Points balance to attract a mate.

Write a dystopian novel in which a burgeoning dictatorship lays waste to the thriving "I voted" sticker industry.

@malarkeybooks.bsky.social Now is the time for Malarkey to absorb Teen Vogue.

Not Left. Not Right. Lobotomized.

Write a sci-fi novel in which a government shutdown prevents daylight savings from ending, leaving Americans trapped forever in the future.

Eight of these are going out tomorrow. Still some copies left of each. Pick your poison, name your price.

I've been driving a car with only a radio for a decade. Tomorrow I'm getting a car with a CD player. So I went to my storage and dug out old mix CDs.

Pitch a Mad Max sequel set in the California Love video.

In Carmax the signs all said they have no haggle pricing and I was like but that's just a suggestion right because I've seen guys even haggle in Walmart. It is in fact not just a suggestion, it turns out.

Write a horror novel called Take a Picture It'll Last Longer about a man who has his picture taken and becomes trapped in the photograph for all time.

A Google search for "apocalypse reaction video" yields 1,480 results.

I unearthed a box of old titles I didn't know I still had. Make me an offer, I'll mail you some books.

Got some @malarkeybooks.bsky.social from Craig Rodgers today. Thanks Craig!