New Knives Out. Hmm. I think the Gothic camp would have been more whelming if there weren't half a dozen parish churches in spitting distance of me that all look like that. Tonally, it was Conclave filmed in Chipping Sodbury.

Dreamed an amazingly complicated but brilliant plot. Even in my sleep, I thought 'this is something Christopher Nolan is going to want to film.' Tried to remember it as I woke up. Am now left with: 'it's in three parts and there was a scene that was mostly red'.

Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, because he knew that the cup of a carpenter from Nazareth would not be made out of gold.

Unbelievably, #DuvetKnowItsChristmas generates such good will on social media that over the years we've raised somewhere approaching a quarter of a million quid for homeless charities. If you can spare a bob or two, sling some to Centrepoint, and here's the link: www.gofundme.com/f/duvet-know...

I was always gonna donate to #DuvetKnowItsChristmas, but this entry sent me scurrying to the fundraiser. It's giving strong '90s chain letter threat of a curse' vibes.

#DuvetKnowItsChristmas 2025 The Peach Room of Doom awaits, with a bonus clothes dryer, his and hers towels, and after 24 years of marriage the Formica Stool of Chastity guarantees a hankypanky-free night Donate to @centrepointuk.bsky.social at www.gofundme.com/f/duvet-know... h/t to @rhodri.biz

The dog is very much looking forward to tomorrow and Local Children Fall Off eScooters in the Park Day. It's her favourite annual freak out.

Want to hear about my worst ever Christmas Day? Sure you do. 20-ish years ago, my then-girlfriend said her brother had invited us to spend Christmas day with him and his girlfriend at said girlfriend's mum's house. Sounds cosy, right? Nope. 1/

I've long understood that the left are cursed to 'people's front of judea' their way into obscurity. I can only hope that the right are about to do the same.

Everyone involved in the publication and promotion of this book should be embarrassed. It's not a "harsh truth" that COVID mitigation was a mistake, it's ghoulish and false.

Tomorrow evening it’ll be my annual duty to vaguely shepherd the activity on the #duvetknowitschristmas hashtag and urge people to give small sums to charity. 7.30pm? Something like that?

We need to eat tea from the freezer tonight to make room for ice cubes to go with Christmas gin. It's getting festive! 🍟🌭

The Dunning-Kruger Effect and the Streisand Effect, when merged, become the Bari Weiss Effect

call us old fashioned but, if you've built a machine that makes child porn, we really don't care if can do anything else. unplug the machine.

As a journal editor this is fucken horrifying. Asbestos in the walls.

If you know that the young women in your employment are not safe around your cash cow, and your "solution" is to ensure the young women work in pairs, *you* are one of the people your employees are not safe around. Furious all over again with publishing.

Every time there's a breaking story about a celeb's treatment of women, everyone in the book world asks, "Is it finally Walliams?" Well, it finally is.

Have I seen a ratio on Bluesky yet? This may be my first, and it was worth the wait.

If you’re working on any area of fantasy and the fantastic, come and join us at Glasgow in June 2026 and do consider presenting or running a workshop! All the info you need and the full CFP is here: fantasy.glasgow.ac.uk/index.php/20... @uofgfantasy.bsky.social @uofgartshums.bsky.social

ICYMI in our latest issue: this year’s stand out new books, recommended by a panel of experts including Books for Keeps reviewers and writers. #KidLitUK booksforkeeps.co.uk/article/book...

Nobody in The Moral Maze gets eaten by the Moral Minotaur, which is a fundamental flaw in the programme.

We are a team at the University of Manchester researching what UK undergraduates with ADHD and/or autism would like to see in university staff training on ensuring undergraduate courses are accessible to them. Study link: www.qualtrics.manchester.ac.uk/jfe/form/SV_...

Absolutely horrific and repulsive. Solidarity with Jewish friends, especially as it’s the first night of Hannukah www.theguardian.com/australia-ne...

I should probably save for my old age. But secretly, I'm saving to get my own Petit Train touristique. I intend to offer free lifts to anyone as long as they don't mind sharing the seat with my dogs. *Photo for illustration purposes only. These are not my dogs.

There isn't a single problem "solved" by edtech that couldn't be fixed with smaller classes led by well-paid teachers given real academic freedom

*Disneyland Paris puts on extra buses*

I've played 133 escape rooms, and this may be my favorite thing out of any of them. It's an accessibility panel that gives players direct control over sound volume and flashing lights. (Plus it directs them to other accessibility options elsewhere in the room.) Bravo to 60 Out Hollywood!

Delighted that Michael Hobbes has finally got to do an Elon Musk episode, and hope this means the Eurovision episode is one step closer.

I don't mind the smell of a vape, but I really don't understand why anyone wants to smoke an Um-Bongo.

Being a British parent is so weird bc you're actually worried about paying the sky high rent/mortgage & getting GP appointments but the entire press keeps telling you you're worried there's a trans person or immigrant nearby & the vat on Eton means there'll only be two skiing holidays this year

Today I discovered that Americans pay to go into their national parks. 👀👀

I am honestly very curious to know how women will be asked to prove they are women in order to be allowed to vote. Passports and birth certificates aren't enough. Will there be some kind of peepshow booth next to the coffee stand?

Happy to share that I'm joining the faculty at Bath Spa as a senior lecturer in writing for young people. 🛼🛼🛼 Only two days a week, so will do it alongside my role at Lancaster. But am super stoked to be with the brilliant team there from January. 💃🕺💃

There's just 2 days left to bid on an array of stunning art, books, mentoring sessions and experiences all in aid of the people of Sudan! Definitely lots of #ArtAdventCalendar worthy pieces there.... #Creatives4Sudan app.galabid.com/creatives4su... #ArtSky #BookSky #CraftSky #Art

Recently been looking at teaching from an outside perspective with my insider knowledge and I don’t think many people realise how impressive it is that there are actual people who can hold the attention of 30 fifteen-year olds about something they haven’t chosen to study for an hour.

Thanks for everyone who's bid on the #Creatives4Sudan auction so far. In amazing news, we're at 12k. We have TWO DAYS LEFT though. If everyone places lots of little bids, I think we could get to 15k easy. The money is going to Sudanese-run Emergency Response Rooms. 💗🇸🇩 app.galabid.com/creatives4su...

#ReadPalestine Day 2 an incredible true love story spanning Palestine, Italy and UK. #TheCrossing by Sabrin Hasbun is a reminder that love, new kinships, and political and ethical commitments flourish despite occupation, apartheid and genocide.

I think my dog is a Hobbit. She believes so fervently in second breakfast. She never gets it, but she holds on to hope harder than Samwise Gamgee.

Look around. The case for more, not less, liberal arts education - actual, real education in reading, writing, thinking, arguing, analyzing, & synthesizing by doing the actual hard work for which there is no substitute - is stronger than it’s ever been at any point in human history.

Please share: I am delighted to release the programme for the July 11 2026, Symposium on the work of Frances Hardinge, at Kings College, London. We can't manage virtual attendance but we do offer cheap conference proceedings. Tickets at Eventbrite: www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/a-one-day-...

Just officially launched this wonderful @sidekickbooks.bsky.social anthology which I contributed to... it's perfectly stocking-sized, just right for the vampire lover in your life! sidekickbooks.com/booklab/book...

The podcast adverts are getting super local. Currently, mine include one for a coffee shop about two miles away from my house. I have high hopes that soon it will be for 'Bengal Spice, 200 yards from this cinema'.

If you missed our conference, and you're feeling glum about it, then the post-conference ticket might be for you! It gives you access to the panel papers and Q&A with the authors until 1st Feb 2026 for only £8! www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/on-writing...

The Guardian apparently bothered by "keep girls out of boy's spaces" 👀 Hegseth reportedly plans to cut support to US scouts group for being ‘genderless’ www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...

I'm so excited to see we've raised over 5k so far on the #Creatives4Sudan auction. Can you help us get to £10k? I'm offering a personalised original Loki drawing, and I really will go all out to make it as funny as possible. app.galabid.com/creatives4su... #KidLitUK #KeepEyesOnSudan

I actually have started writing down my favorite, trusted online recipes in a binder because I am not sure the sites will survive. When I traveled overseas last year, I bought a paper travel guide, something that I never thought I would do again.

The enemy fleet is threatening to open fire on us, Captain. But not in a hurtful or insulting way.

If your laws make it possible for Candice Owens to stop Brigitte Macron taking a piss when she's shopping at big Tesco's, then your laws are wrong.

THE CREATIVES4SUDAN AUCTION IS NOW LIVE!!!! THE CREATIVES4SUDAN AUCTION IS NOW LIVE!!!! THE CREATIVES4SUDAN AUCTION IS NOW LIVE!!!! app.galabid.com/creatives4su...