“I dunno if that would work just because the head to hole ratio is so massively off” pop quiz, are we talking about sexual activity or altering Labubu clothes

my favorite thing about pokémon is that EVERY pokémon is SOMEONE'S favorite, even the ones you think are obnoxious trash and you know what? YOU are someone's favorite pokémon, even when you feel like obnoxious trash you are SOMEONE'S favorite odd little creature, and they love you SO MUCH

A reminder that as ICE continues their terror campaign across North Carolina, some of their SUVs were provided on a no-compete contract from Hendrick Automotive Group. Spend your money elsewhere. www.wbtv.com/2025/11/17/h...

is shaking ass/borderline twerking remotely necessary while spinning? nah am I eternally grateful to James Hype for blessing us with such during this set? yeah

me re: someone reciting google AI answers- “I trust any AI about as far as I can throw it and data centers are heavy”

watching football and seeing a local high school JROTC presenting the colors for the anthem and it’s like on one hand fuck the military etc etc but on the other I had so much goddamn fun in JROTC myself so it hits the nostalgia buttons whoops

Angels in the Outfield but it's hockey and it's just Gritty murdering the opposing team

speaking of Raleigh decided to recreate one of my favorite bar meals from back home (the Saucer Bratzel). not a 1:1 copy but good enough for scratching the itch yum 😋

found this squish at the goodwill over the weekend and almost left it be until I saw his name 🥺🥺 what a precious bean

lmao the overworked Dunkin just handed me a cup full of ice, milk and flavor syrup topped with cold foam but kinda missing the important part 😂😂🙃 thankfully they fixed it but lmao what if I had decided to get a hot drink today instead

look at this trans af color profile 😏😏 love this

hell yeah motherfuckers

making someone one of today’s lucky 10,000 but it’s just informing them of the time Cosmo actually printed the suggestion of sticking a dick through a donut as a sex toy

trying to figure out how for once in my life I am awake at 4 in the goddamn am and the only caffeine I had all day was my morning coffee at like 11am meanwhile I routinely take down at least 1 energy drink per workday and have successfully pulled off 3 while sleeping like a baby that night idgi?!?

I KNOW YOU'RE FUCKING LYING RN, STOPPPP 💀💀💀

tonight’s comically timed sexytime DJ set drop brought to you by Layton Giordani deciding to throw a sped-up version of “Tom’s Diner” in his mix at the precise moment we decided to get frisky 😬

broke: “if we’re still single by the time we’re [age] we’ll marry each other” woke: “if we both make it to 70 we’ll make sure we’re blowing each other” #lemonkitkatparty

I don’t have a lot of best buddies in PoGo bc lazy but you best believe this guy was the first one I got there I lowkey dislike his shiny but whatcha gonna do

forget the kinky cruise ship, how much startup capital do we need for THIS 🥺

don’t live in NC anymore but boosting bc fuck that let em knowwww

autocorrect tried to change “cages” to “cafes” and while that’s not what I was talking about initially now I DO want mtf/ftm cafes hmm

scamper forward, posthaste!

still laughing my ass off over getting asked my favorite Pokémon by the guy at the dispo earlier (I was in a “Pokémon Trainer” shirt) and his stunned reaction when I immediately replied “Lickitung!” bro definitely wasn’t expecting THAT response for sure lmao 😂 what can I say, I love the unloveables

also okay hearing Fitz & the Tantrums on an EDM track was not something I expected to hear this morning but I'm here for it lfg

there are a LOT more appealing and appetizing dicks that are presently occupying my mind, let's please not ruin that okay cool thanks

I would very much like to go back to before I woke up and learned unfortunate things about unfortunate people and their unfortunate penises

been getting called “bruv” so often lately I’m considering making it my honorific 🤔🤔

today in Deep Insightful EDM Lyrics: a song entitled "On the Beach", in which the only lyric is the phrase "on the beach" repeated ad nauseam, in a song that doesn't actually sound anything like a beach you know what at least "Fancy $hit" contains not one but two complete and coherent sentences

swear to god if I ever get into drag I’m lip synching to John Summit’s “Crystallized” as my first song idk why but it’s so fuckin fun lmao it would be fantastic

pro wrestling is eroguro

yeah, also this

oh god of course yuta wants to be in the cage as long as possible

since it came up in conversation tonight I gotta know if there’s a contingent of tops out there that engage in waxING play, like mean hair removal surely that’s gotta be a thing somewhere

Are you saying that mainstream country is trying to make money while giving real artists and writers as little money and credit as possible This is literally the very first time this has happened in the history of the genre known as country music

toni and mina's explicitly romantic relationship leading to toni tapping out mirrored to mox tapping for yuta is actually driving me insane

re: last post, oh fuckin boyyyyyy (what do we say here instead of LRT, is it LRS for ‘last reskeet’? pls say no)

Nothing can possibly go wrong here

some days I look in my closet and I ask myself, “Avery, don’t you regret buying a ‘Scissor Me Daddy Ass’ shirt knowing that the Acclaimed gravy train wasn’t gonna last forever?” and the answer is: honestly yeah a lil ngl

the Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs chart except the bottom level is me orchestrating being the dominant middle of a subby girldick/femboy spitroast

If I become president in 2028, I will change the slogan on our national seal to "e PLURibus uNYAm"

fair use kink; you can fuck me me whenever you want without a license as long as I am being used for criticism, commentary, satire or research purposes

I can’t believe Zohran is transing the trains already www.mta.info/article/f-m-...

PSA: vote in your democratic primaries next year. Zohran proved that we can get rid of these centrist do-nothing bootlickers

spent the majority of the day in bed either napping or stimulating my dick/the wife’s dick in some fashion or other truly living my best life out here holy shit lmao

Mamdani’s politics, progressive politics, should be the tiles in the floor on which we stand. what he wants to achieve for New Yorkers (and for everyone, I assume) should represent the BARE MINIMUM of what we expect of every politician who asks us for a job

I’ve upped the goal to $5K because y’all keep crushing every other milestone I’ve set so far. thank you to everyone who’s donated or shared. lotta people are gonna eat because you cared ❤️ teamfeed.feedingamerica.org/participants...

lmao one minute into the game and we’re already dropping the ball I’m done already

it @ausdebiru.bsky.social

really hate that my body is on a timer bc I have zero reason to need to sleep right now lmao time to fight on bc it will be worth it