Travis Kelce washed?

Trump:

OMG Fayetteville didn’t deserve this stray 😩

I’m SCREAMING at the accuracy 🤣

Dirty Myrtle is where you go when you wanna do the kinda dirt you should be doing in DR but you only got Fayetteville money

Growing up I lived down the road from a man who raised exotic animals. He had ostriches and other random shit. Id get off the bus sometimes and there would be a note on the mailbox that his ostriches were out and to stay in the house til he caught em bc they'd fuck you and whatever dog you had up

Crisp af

Wayne did a big one with that Throw It In The Bag freestyle

I know that Mountain Dew would take me on up to the clouds

White people when black people taught them the cupid shuffle:

Imagine losing your job bc you fucked a sentient brake pad. Tragic

The autistic lady at work caught me just clocking out for my lunch break and now she's telling me about every thrift find she's found in the entire RDU area over her 50 year lifespan

They be doing shit with excel that I didn't know was possible.

These vocals coming out of that pixie sized woman have always amazed me

This is a wild way to find out they recast Black Adam

You are at least 79 and 3/4

The internet was a mistake

You guys could use a laugh

Everybody had an A Milli freestyle. I'm sure I had one at some point

The most self-aware thing I’ve ever seen.

And he ain't wrong. At all.

Wealth

They gonna blame racism for the CTE they give themselves fighting each other instead of the people they hate

You cut this down from 10min and I'm on minute 42? Sorcery

Same same same. Well, I'm rooting for you. ❤️

Dear December, Be kind to us. Love, Candace

I'm glad to see more people on the anti avocado on everything agenda

This is the nigga that's selling out arenas? The kids are fucking doomed

Every time I've ventured over to Threads I've regretted it

Happiness

Depends on what side of wealthy you're on

Being an adult

I know exactly what you're going thru. No you don't. Shut up and move along please

Spring

Talking on speakerphone, letting children run wild, being rude to service industry people

Anything fruit flavored

Ketchup, chili, cheese

Going to Japan

Privacy

Peace of mind, a clear conscience, real love

By being alone

Mt. Dew Baja Blast

Eating, sleeping, reading

Whatever days I'm off work and with my girl

Sir your total is $78.96 Gotdamn... a hunnid dollars?

I can't tell with any certainty which foot I'm looking at here.

Ugh, congrats on the promotion, and I'm sorry it's not what you need! Good luck! 🤞

Buddy toes, heel, and ankle all going in different directions