Read this. Merry Christmas indeed

Extremely funny to call the pope “holier-than-thou”

Snuck away to do some writing and get coffee at Starbucks. Thought I’d be the only one. There was another guy here deep in focus on his when I get here. Recession indicator? Late-stage capitalism? Anyway Merry Christmas from our laptops to yours 🎅🏾

I just uploaded @jasonparis.bsky.social 's recording of the segment CBS News pulled from "60 Minutes" to YouTube:

these people are running the United States of America.

if I’m Karoline, I’m deadass SUING someone

This fills me with so much rage. apnews.com/article/gofu...

I'd like to be smug and say it was because I wanted to be refreshed and glowing when I landed, but the real reason I stopped drinking on planes is because the wine sucks.

The most shocking thing about 50 Cent’s Diddy doc is that Puff was hanging out with *checks notes* *squints* Hezekiah Walker? The fuck??!

The day they put protein in wine it’ll be OVER for you hoes

So...are the Bears good? Like **actually** good? Guys I'm not used to this. I feel....hope? Excitement? Oh gawd I'm scared I don't understand these feelings of joy

I love Philly and hope to live here (or in the northeast) for the rest of my life but when I tell you my hometown pride is BEAMING right now watching the Bears hold their own...I'm so excited for Chicago. BEAR DOWN!!!! 🧡💙

Look. Christopher Nolan’s films are a lot. But I stand ten toes down on Inception being an **elite** movie: excellent acting, compelling (even if the math doesn’t work lol) story, and everyone is stunning to look at. This was the film that really got me into Leo..and put me on Joseph Gordon Levitt 💯

🎶 and then a hero comes along……

It's embarrassing how long it took me to realize that "save $50 on orders over $200!" wasn't me saving $50; it was me spending at least $150 😩

Every time someone’s like “put that in the louvre,” my head now goes “and then steal it from the louvre, the security password is louvre”

okay, so, with Dems successfully keeping anyone up in 2026 for voting for this turd let's take a look at who's up in 2026 anyway: 1. Cory Booker - apparently involved behind the scenes, constantly looking for bipartisanship. I don't dislike him personally but he doesn't have what we need. Primary.

Ordered a side of fries “just to pick at” so of course I’m inhaling them with so much ferality I might as well be rubbing my face in the plate

This person took this when they called the race

A bloodbath. We as a nation are sick of this fuckery. 💪

Why I avoided talking for years (and why examining what you're hiding from is a top-tier personal development hack) open.substack.com/pub/sharonst...

“Republicans could fund SNAP if they wanted to. They just don’t want to.” - @jesscraven101.bsky.social

I don’t know if it’s the constant brain shoveling of bad news or my allergies physically and emotionally destroying or kist my sheer rage anytime I have to math, but today I had to remind myself that not wanting to count the plate weight was NOT a valid reason to skip squat day

I cannot wait until the 3-part streaming doc comes out about this in ~8 months www.cnn.com/2025/10/19/e...

*chef's kiss*

heartbroken to learn the pope sympathizes with the poor. how can i continue to believe in god

So. Serious question. So people still major in English? In 2025?

pretends_to_be_shocked.gif

Reporting live from Chicago, there’s no “hellscape” I’d rather be in.

500 national guard vs. the city of Chicago? lol ok sure

So proud of my hometown 🇺🇸

“A second inflatable frog has now been spotted wiggling through Portland.”

seriously tho whatever is in those Epstein files is about 500000000000000x worse than whatever we think it is because my gawd that dog and pony show has been BUSY whew

reading these replies is the first time I've had fun on this app in months 😂

Yes I know my password is too easy but it's easy because this is a low-stakes app and I need to be able to get into it without having to guess what the hell I was thinking that one Tuesday afternoon 4 months ago after staring at Word for three hours, two urgent emails and my fifth cup of coffee UGH

Why didn’t any you - my VERY good friends - tell me that Kali Uchis has new music coming out tonight?! it’s like you don’t even care about me

The NFL really just said “fck tr*mp” lolol

# of paragraphs for news orgs to mention there's no discernable need to deploy troops to Portland, Oregon The Guardian: 1st paragraph BBC: 4th paragraph AP: 5th paragraph Time: 6th paragraph Politico: 8th paragraph NPR: 9th paragraph CNN: 10th paragraph NBC: 12th paragraph Fox News: never mentions

Pre workout today was four hard boiled eggs and a chocolate chip cookie because I do what the fuck I want. And because *gestures to everything* but mostly the first one

rapture day?! darlings, we do not DESERVE the rapture. have you seen us.

how about we not take medical advice from a guy who cannot pronounce “acetaminophen”

Guys the bears are gonna win their first game of the season and they actually look GOOD good (hell yeah Chicago!!!) Completely unrelated: my gawd the cowboys are a terrible football team

I used to think fluency made me a better speaker. Turns out, stuttering does. 👉 The future of leadership isn’t about perfection. It’s about permission to give others the space to be human. Emotions aren’t liabilities. They’re assets. substack.com/home/post/p-...

Anybody else have a preferred font in Word dependent entirely on mood/goals? Mine is Georgia when I'm feeling creative and Arial (regular) when I need to get shit done. Yes she's basic

Not really an overstatement to say that the test of a free society is whether or not comedians can make fun of the country's leader on TV without repurcussions.

We’ve been living through 72 nonstop hours of this exact tweet

Watching all these centrist pundits stress the “civility” of Charlie Kirk’s style without addressing the ugliness of his substance is giving me a renewed appreciation of how the civil, polite White Citizens’ Councils conned the same crowd into thinking they were distinct from the cruder Klan.

These past three days have reminded me why I keep my burner clock app account because whew