Got let go from my job. Economy sucks. If you're looking for a marketing/advertising/community/influencer relations guy with years of experience, my DMs are open. Solo built websites, design, built, and ran ad/marketing campaigns on basically every platform and at events. Video, audio, the works.

Zohran says you’re trans now

I am hearing that Zohran Mamdani personally approached Dick Cheney in his final moments, where the Vice President recited the Shahada and admitted that he was worried he would not have time before he passed to be admitted into Jannah and sit with the faithful to watch over the Ummah.

Bluesky rn

The sandwich exploded on me. I could feel it through my bulletproof vest. The worst part about it, though, was the smells. Onions. Mustard. I'll never forget what I went through that day. How could I. How could anyone. Mustard stains, oh god, the mustard stains.

Watching two people who desperately want to laugh at someone who made their lives hell dying but can't because they're about to be the mayor and mayoress of New York City is hysterical. He literally just does this and tries his damndest to not say anything.

Easily one of the funniest crossovers of the modern era is the fact that the Denver Broncos fanbase has decided that they will co-opt one of the most popular video games of 2025 to make highlight reels with. That game? Umamusume: Pretty Derby.

We've been doing work on a baker's house for a bit and today he came into the office with a thank you gift, and HOLY SHIT THE BEST CANNOLIS IN BOSTON JUST GOT HAND DELIVERED TO THE OFFICE OH FUCK ME OH GOD

I can.

when i finally snap they'll say they never saw it coming. but i'm telling you. there are signs

One of my favorites movies is Lord of War, not because of the movie itself, but because everything involved in the production is absolutely insane.

I have fucked over people with Eternal Weekend prize money with this card. Now I show it to you, MTG community: The answer to Firebending in a single. goddamn. card.

They announced a Switch 2 version of Factorio and all I can think about is this post

gonna try giving myself a hypoxia-induced loboty to cure my addiction to guys, brb

Me when Melville chucks another throwaway line into his books that will be better than anything I've ever written or will ever be able to write

Out boss wants us to have weekly meetings as an office on Mondays and Fridays. Had the first morning of meetings and they were all productive and blew by, unlike every other job I've ever worked. You can have... Meetings... That don't suck...?

SHIVERS - MAKE IT RIGHT. MORE THAN YOU KNOW DEPENDS ON IT.

while it may not seem like it to someone scrolling by with a cursory look, what i am creating is not ‘ironic’ nor a ‘get rich quick scheme’ and it is certainly not AI GENERATED. it is a genuine expression of my heart and my beliefs about sexuality and art and love and freedom and curiosity and joy

please enjoy brand new tingler MY NEIGHBOR’S TWELVE-FOOT-TALL DECORATIVE HALLOWEEN SKELETON GETS ME OFF ALSO SHE IS A LESBIAN out now here www.amazon.com/dp/B0FWC6K3MR/ or on all patreon tiers www.patreon.com/posts/my-nei...

You gently run your hand through the rack. You can feel it—pure cotton, rich wool, Irish linen. The plump buttonholes are handsewn; the buttons attached with a firm shank. You flip the price tag over. It's affordable You buy the jacket and go home, which is only 15 mins away. Your apt is $600/month

Went to the State Fair. Remains absolutely fantastic in terms of vibes.

Not to be this guy, but I respectfully disagree with Amy. We've had Masshole representation for quite some time.

Don't you love it when your hot water heater, car, and computer break on the same day? in case you were wondering how my day's going, i'm about one piece of bad news away from selling everything i own and becoming a cave hermit.

It is insane to me that the cheapest, rinkydink piece of shit 3d printer is more reliable than a 4,000 dollar Epson. I've met computer engineers with decades of experience building some of the most complex code who consider the average office printer to be an unsolvable black box.

After a month and a half, Walgreens finally filled my Adderall prescription. We're so fucking back, folks.

“Hating a computer program is racism” is such a funny belief to talk yourself into.

Views at the wedding I'm at are pretty solid. Only thing that could make it better is maybe an Amazon delivery center, maybe a Walmart.

WE'RE SO FUCKING BACK IT'S NEVER BEEN MORE BACK SKONG IS REAL, BF6 IS REAL, AND NOW FUCKIN' PROTOMEN ACT III IS REAL OH MY GOD IT'S NEVER BEEN MORE FUCKING BACK THAN IT IS AT THIS VERY MOMENT I'M FUCKING GOING INSANE AAAAAHHHHHHHHH

It's October in Salem, you know what that means: It's officially "YOU DUMB FUCK YOU SHOULD HAVE COME IN AUGUST GET OUT OF THE FUCKING ROAD" time!

I guess no one else is willing to say it because of the current political climate but fuck it i refuse to be silent on this any longer. they need to title the fucking goose game it's been too long it only becomes more irresponsible, insulting and frankly dangerous the more time goes on

Post a you from a different era

we learned about the 3rd amendment in law classes as "yeah this was put here because this used to be an issue hundreds of years ago, it almost never comes up because violating it is such an obvious blunder" but now uhhhhhhhh

CUNO - “Fuck does Cuno care?” The boy turns to you. (He doesn't care.)

Yeah man I have autism because my mom took Tylenol while pregnant and not because my father is a man who once left his own birthday party because he got too overstimulated. Totally. No it's the acetometaphin, not the fact that every time I see him we spend hours on his newest niche hyperfixation.

I'm realizing now I forgot to explain her newest hire: René Zagger. She hired fucking EMET SELCH TO PLAY THE DEVIL. Also, he is romanceable. So. You know.

Rebecca Ford hiring the voice talent of her husbandos and slamming it into her game like she's a fucking pokemon trainer has been one of funniest developments I've seen in MMO development in some time. Just unabashed levels of simping not seen outside of Hideo Kojima projects.

"Most men want a bangmaid, but some women think that maybe, possibly, that women are also human?"

😤

me: seven drops with no protection are completely unplayable, your deck should top at six and anything above that is probably going to be cut eventually. also me: baby. baby that wasn't about you. baby you know i love you baby BABY NO DON'T TARGET ME WITH ONE RED MANA OPEN BABY I CAN CHANGE

continues to piss me off how absolutely brutal moby dick is when it comes to quotes that would define an author but just get hammered out one after another with no room to breathe. it is a book that is impossible to read without needing to pause and breach for air like the cetaceans it worships.

what is it that makes the front of a man—what, indeed, but his eyes?

evergreen skeet

Been thinking about athletes with such absurd performances that the modern era refuses to yield to them, folks who reached the peak so early that decades later the people trying to scale the mountain of their achievements will almost assuredly never reach the pinnacle.

I love that he waits in line to see his actual friends because he's the king of the simps. We stan Hideo now and forever.

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