i wake up my child because i made cinnamon rolls (her favorite) 5: thanks for interrupting my nap me: you mean waking you up for the day? you’re welcome! 5: i said that like, that like.. me: sarcastically? 5: yes. scar-cat-stick-ly (storms off angrily) 😂

went to ulta to buy a new mascara, an employee got it from the back for me & at checkout i’m told i can’t buy it in store, but i can order online & ship to my house. i might’ve “karen”ed out a bit at the stupidity of this whole situation & when i asked the manager when it will be available for in…

DANGEROUS COATS Someone clever once said Women were not allowed pockets In case they carried leaflets To spread sedition Which means unrest To you & me A grandiose word For commonsense Fairness Kindness Equality So ladies, start sewing Dangerous coats Made of pockets & sedition. - Sharon Owens

if there’s ever an ad/commercial interrupting something my daughter is watching, & it happens to have a man in it… she yells exasperatedly “UUUUGH WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE MEN?!!!” & honestly same girl.

Blessed Yule everyone! 🎄 #FreeWitch #Witchsky

last minute gift for junebug. i’m excited to use this over the summer break! #secularhomeschool #witchsky #kidsbook #science

Pouring a nice glass of eggnog for Bowen Yang tonight #SNL

THIS BOWEN SKIT HAS ME CRYINGGGGG 😭 #snl

it’s funny when kids don’t really know the lyrics to songs & sing loudly what they THINK it says. “shake ya ass, wash your feet, show me what you’re talkin’ about” is her version of the Mystikal hit “shake ya ass” 😂 (she heard it one time on a silly dog tiktok & sings it all the time now 🤦🏻‍♀️)

last night i checked our outside camera (to check on my ferals) & saw this cutie hanging out. this guy lives up the road from us a couple blocks away, surprised he came all the way here to roll around in the catnip on their doormat 😂 #caturday

You will be visited by three spirits.

3yo: “daddy’s phone is in his pocket!” me: “that’s true!” 3yo: “why isn’t mummy’s phone in her pocket?” me: “… buckle up, kiddo, we’re gonna discuss five hundred years of fashion and misogyny”

WHAT IS EVEN THE POINT OF WATCHING AFTER TOMORROW?!!!! 😭

spent $140 at the vet today because my old dog has been having daily potty accidents in the house & we’re extra cautious w/him because he’s had pancreatitis 3x. i was thinking UTI, but it’s worse… this 70 (in dog yrs) old man is a little bitch about the cold & was prescribed “dog coat & booties” 🤦🏻‍♀️

my kid thinks it’s HILARIOUS that i’m wrapping a gift to my husband in an old blender box we have been hoarding for almost a decade since our wedding lol she said it’s “an iconic prank” & she thinks she’s a real Prank Sinatra.

quit all Meta apps in january, but sometimes i wonder what britney spears is up to…

"A Greener Path" 12x16 inches, oils on copper panel. A painting about taking your time to notice the small things, staying calm, and remembering that progress takes patience. 🌼⁠

our secular homeschool group hosted a Fireside Solstice craft day & here are a few things we made: rainbow snowflake (german kite paper & glue), beeswax candle, & her “happy heart” pomander. not pictured is the stack of dried orange slices, salt dough buttons & twine for garland #witchsky #solstice

what I want trans kids, queer kids, and gender nonconforming kids to know: you are loved you are so much more powerful than the ghouls using your healthcare as a political pawn, and you WILL outlive them (they know this, and it is why they're attacking you)

Rest In Peace Rob Reiner 💙❤️💙

Merry Cryptmas!

listen, the original Anaconda movie is one of my all time favorites. this is a movie about guys wanting to remake the Anaconda movie, when things go wrong & they end up in an ACTUAL OG-Anaconda-Movie-style scenario & i am so fucking stoked about this 😂 😭 🐍

as much as i don’t love “The Girl In The Bubble” in Wicked: For Good, i have to admit all of the through-the-mirror shots were fucking incredible. 🫧🪞

this morning i checked on the feral kitty camera like i always do when i wake up, to see if their food & water need replenishing… these little chonkers shoved the two empty containers up to the cat house door & im taking that as “why have you not FED US YETTTT peasant?!!”

Anybody want to go Christmas caroling with us, we're singing Fuck the Police

How it feels to be #BillsMafia… (Graphic design is my passion 😂😂) Go Bills! ❤️💙

The Bills vs Patriots game recap, a meme, again:

i just can’t wait for the #BillsMafia style table-baptism of baby Steinfeld-Allen.

last night i was the only #GothMom at the wisconsin supper club, but there WAS a table people dressed as characters from National Lampoons Christmas Vacation (including the fried cat & squirrel) & they started their meal by having the woman dressed as Aunt Bethany saying the pledge of allegiance. 🎄

my husband is taking juniper out to buy me a christmas present. only problem is, the two local witchy shops near us closed recently so let’s see what they come up with 😂

let’s not forget “no cheeses for us meeces.” 🧀 🐭

you know how i know this isn’t true? we go to the movies every tuesday (local theater has a deal that day) & it’s always packed! & as much as i hate being around people, i love our family’s little tradition of smuggling PB&Js into the theater while also buying a large drink & popcorn 🍿

hailee steinfeld & the only quarterback in NFL history are having a babyyyyy!

Burned out.

does anyone want to give my family a ton of money so we can move to the PNW & ride out this hellscape of a government in a really beautiful hoa hoa hoa setting? 🏔️🌲

Sorry for using comics and art to vent and cope with the world changing around me. I will return to drawing whimsical and silly frog wizards and adventures.

I kind of love this. And potatoes 🥔

listen it’s something i’m going to be annoying about but i am obsessed with @torchlight.bsky.social for our secular homeschooling. it’s never too late to switch curricula if what you have isn’t working. my kid is, as of now, a visual learner & torchlight has LISTS of shows/movies to help w/ lessons

i’d like to thank @jordanmyr1ck.bsky.social & @gastronauts.bsky.social for how my almost-6 yr old daughter comes up with goofy prompts & finishes with “your time starts… NOOOW!!” when i ask her what to make for breakfast. 👩🏻‍🍳🚀

Oh shit, are we hating on Jimmy Fallon? He's the unseasoned chicken of people, he's White Liberal Original Flavour™️, he's like if mud carrying intestinal parasites somehow landed a comedy career, I stg he only exists 'cause Disney's blue fairy farted on a ventriloquist dummy.

I went into target the other day and now I can see how they're going to win back jaded customers

And in case you need a mousewitch with fancy boots.

Every time Harrison Butker misses a field goal a woman gets her PHD

feels like -2°f outside, but my feral cat babies are warm in their cuddle puddle. i’m still so sad finding their mom dead on the road. 😭 but i’ve pretty much been their primary care taker for the last 3 months so i doubt they’d be phased if they could understand my sobbing apologies about their loss

went to a bday party @ chuck e cheese (masked the whole time cuz ew) & saw a kid wearing a palestine 🇵🇸 hoodie. i told the kids grownup i loved the shirt & he lit up immediately & his whole mood shifted. he even offered to buy my kid one, which i said we will get it. lol a kind word goes a long way.

Know your rights. Protect your neighbors. New York is — and always will be — a city for all immigrants.

Because joy is resistance and because the fascists have no art in them, or magic.

🪡 🧵 i’ve been sewing for 20+ yrs & have a BFA in fashion design - i still never feel like i know what i’m doing but i’m always willing to help.