Bsky is trying to get me to give them my birthdate but I don't need that kind of negativity in my life

George Washington was a fucking doofus. He accidentally gets the Seven Years War started by stumbling into Ohio, costing Britain a heap of money. Britain starts taxing their colonies to recoup the cost. The colonies fight Britain for independence and make him President Doofus

Every religion is a fandom that got out of hand. And while you might interpret this as a slight against religion, it's actually a warning about fandoms

It's unbearable. People who think this is the best time of year are absolutely off their rocker.

The biggest problem with posting on this platform, as far as I can see, is that the people who manage it are some bitch ass hoes

BABY ALERT. I REPEAT. SWEET BABY ALERT

"We can't have a Wealth Tax, that has absolutely no regard for how much money you're able to make in the current moment" okay great please now explain how property taxes work because I'm pretty sure no one gives a fuck about my income when that bill comes due

If you see this, repost with your model of positive masculinity

Wow I was mad as hell about this for some reason. I take it back, you are allowed to like some other song, as long as it's Silver Springs

Don't dream it's over is the best song ever written and you're a stupid asshole if you don't acknowledge it

Of course I would

We don't want your stinking hellscape you godforsaken Hoosiers. Put the border wherever you want

Hey Americans, Check in on your Midwest homies. Shit is cold as FUCK right now

Two images. Real ones will understand

Do you think Mister Rogers had a Pittsburgh Toilet? Just shitting and farting in the wide open basement next to the puppets and fish food

I think we're good on guys for a while. I don't see a need for more new guys

joy division - atmosphere walked so the cure - plainsong could soar

Reminder that your body is craving the polyphenols present in fresh fruits and vegetables. Eat an entire lemon, peel and all

RIP. She dated my cousin Josh for a while. She broke up with him because he got fat. Kind of an asshole if I'm being honest

Everyone has the regular bathroom they always use at work, and then there's that other one. You know the one. And you know well in advance when youre gonna make the special trip to that one. That's where I will be posting from today

World AIDS Day: Fuck Dave Grohl just sort of in general because he is a boring dick who sucks, but he sucks most especially for this

That's a Fishtopher right there

There IS a solid set of reasons to believe we are living in a simulation, but Musk has no idea what they are. Put simply, if it's possible for advanced beings in a complex universe to simulate a simpler universe, then the vast majority of universes are likely simulations

Come on man, this is what we go to the pictures for

"Visual Storytelling" - Todd Howard

Just based on a short survey here of places I've been to more than once in the last 10-20 years, a quick analysis of some Canadian cities - Winnipeg, Toronto & vicinity, Vancouver, Windsor, Ottawa...not looking real great guys. Kinda looks like the wheels are coming off a bit

Wow so Niagra Falls is basically a total shit hole huh

Taking some cool recipes for "mocktails" but then adding some booze to them and giving them a cool new name: Rocktails

I know many of you will disagree with me on this, but sitting down to a family thanksgiving dinner is fine. It's good actually. It's touching grass. It helps keep you normal

My hottest take on pizza is this: the most important part of pizza is the bread. Pizza is fundamentally a flatbread with toppings, and if you didn't make the bread good enough to enjoy on its own merits then you fucked up

everyone hella mad today on this website

What, and I'm asking earnestly and with a spirit of genuine thirst for knowledge, the fuck

What should be my next soup. Taking requests

Coconut

Zohran, my man, you gotta get that Mens before that shit take you low

My mentions are like "does tomato sauce need a little sugar" and my wife's mentions are like "I want 1972 Robert De Niro to split me right in half"

No better propaganda than the worst people in the world declaring you their enemy

So here's a gigantic pile of shit I have to deal with at work today: the big telephone carriers have decided that unless your business/org pays an additional fee for priority service, you can never ring a phone and you will always be routed direct to vm. It's like a blue check system for phones

If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? Yes, yes we would, if they never shut the fuck up, and only ever repeated bullshit ass brainrot memes

"We sold all this useless bullshit to all the stupidest people at all the most wasteful companies, so now if it crashes it's a you problem."

Look, I know this isn't going to be a popular observation, and it may be borderline Canceling type behavior, but this woman looks extremely Weird

You know what, I'm going to stop you right there.

Writing to RFK Jr about the public benefit to be realized from the supernutrients present in a hot dog with sauerkraut

It turns out you can make incredible burger if you just focus on seasoning, and not overcooking. PROTIP: burger is, in fact, beef

wcff

I've made a cute little barn owl.. #barnowl #owl #handmade #cute #birb #felting

I fucking love it when I eat shit. I want everyone to see me eating shit. Please let the world see me at my lowest

You think I'm playing? Boi I ain't playing

Ladies and gentlemen, the sopa cubano de los frijoles negros has returned