In our early 20's a former friend had a litbro boyfriend. He used to scream at her until she cried and woo'd her by lying about a trip to Spain where he "had only the money he won in poker games with old men" to survive. Toxic masculinity isn't better because "at least they read."

I also miss mint tea Snapple very much

Apple Pie Snapple Pie (2003, 2005): A limited edition "all natural juice drink" released in the Fall, meant to evoke the taste of apple pie, including apple, cinnamon, and even a hint of pie crust flavor. Was given a brief re-release two years later.

Polar is finally going back into ~weird~ flavors (Boston Cream Pie I miss you) and I am SO excited. I've been emailing asking for vanilla in cans for a decade and FINALLY we've come close. Lemon Meringue is reminiscent of Snapple Pie in that you can taste the crust. (I also really miss Snapple Pie)

I just saw a golden retriever wearing toddler sized Crocs on their paws to help protect them from snow!

A coworker had a sneezing fit. "This happens sometimes with (specific foods). I think it's a minor food allergy. ChatGPT has not been helpful figuring it out." They were being serious. Their spouse is a doctor.

Visitors

Support Troop 6000 for girls who are a part of the shelter system this cookie season! digitalcookie.girlscouts.org/scout/sixk34...

"It can cost around $3 a meal for a piece of chicken, a piece of broccoli, a corn tortilla and one other thing." Taking suggestions for what "one other thing," could possibly be while I refresh and update the vegetarian pantry cooking zine I wrote in March 2020. Coming soon to a screen near you!

Work is playing the early 2000's middle school dance playlist today

Hello in case you were wondering how my day has started this morning I put my cellphone in the fridge at work and I've had to put on/take off so many layers of clothes depending on the temp where I was (outside, bus, office) I feel crazy. All signs point to Cougar Puberty? I hate this

Some levity: Had an incredible conversation with two Gen-Z coworkers (first gen Americans) which started with one saying "I still don't understand what a casserole is. The whole concept feels very Western." in response to today's office breakfast being a French toast casserole.

Lol four days in and by the end of the day I'll have two books: Laila Lalami's "The Dream Hotel" and R.F. Kuang's "Katabasis" For those keeping track that's over 800 pages.

The old ladies of Facebook come through again! Our state offers property tax relief but the support number is a robot that hangs up on you. They found a number that connects you to an exasperated person in a different department that will transfer you wherever you want just to get rid of you.

Finished the year with 133 books. Honestly hoping for fewer in 2026 because eating books is historically how I deal with Bad Things and I'd like less of those this time around.

The first few that came to mind: Ron Jeremy in line ahead of me at the grocery store. Mike "The Situation" stood beside me waiting for coffee. A member of Westlife (idk which one) sat next to me on a plane when I was a teen and tried to talk about music. I ignored and turned my discman up louder.

in 2026 we are NOT hustling, we are NOT grinding, we are doing just enough Job to have money for Video Game

TUNA STATUS: No snow, please.

Here's how easy it can be: One of my distant cousins lives outside the US and prior to this week hasn't been back in 8 years. During this time period, my sister transitioned. My cousin asked me today, "Is your br- wait, your sister now, right? Is your sister coming to dinner tonight too?"

Christmas Greetings to all who celebrate except you fucks who used ChatGPT to insert Santa Claus into your Christmas Eve photos. May you find only coal in your stockings.

In the Miami airport. Oohh… Aahhh.

"It'll all be over soon" is a little ominous but I like the sentiment all the same

Two months later and my old job is still posted 😂

my name is cow and wen its nite and when a star is shiyning brite and three wise men give me the nod i walk up close I lik the God

I'm turning 37 tomorrow. One of my coworkers recently stopped me to say, "Whenever I see you I think "this is the woman my 17 year old niece is going to become."" in reference to my style and how I carry myself. It's nice to be a model of what a successful "alternative" adult can look like. 💖

The Salvation Army bellringer outside the grocery store has a French Horn and is playing "We Three Kings"

HARD BOILED DETECTIVE: another cruel sunrise over the city of the damned. another corpse. another widow. another cup of black coffee to drag my sorry ass back to life- *sputtering* ME: do you like it? it's an ethiopian washed process single origin DETECTIVE: ME: are you getting apricot notes

Seeing the lit up Anheuser-Busch sign when returning from anywhere has always been a beacon of "almost home" to me and now I am very sad.

For a fitness software company with a kombucha bar my job sure has a lot of people* chugging sodas before 11am... *me

Hey so my favorite tea company is now using AI art as part of "personalized" promotions and anyway I'm looking for a new favorite tea company. Anyone have suggestions?

A friend of the family died today. When I was helping my mother clean out her house before she went into care, we found a printed list of pornographic films stocked by our local movie rental place. That closed in the late 90's. She had annotated it. Cheers to a real one.

Ordered a salad today. Turned out to be mostly lime.

Finally the tee shirt rolling skills I developed as a merch girl come in handy! Part of my job today was sorting and labelling branded swag and I just became a machine 😂

I always get weirdly emotional when Santa shows up at the end of the parade. Probably a side effect of being from New Jersey

I need someone to explain to me immediately if KJ Apa is okay because what on earth is a Mr. Fantasy and why has it possessed KJ?

Okay so I've spoken to the wasp experts and we're on a course of new wasps every other week for the next six weeks then should hopefully be moth free. I'm also reading a body horror novel about insects and it took a lot of powering through revulsion to open the first batch that arrived today

Public shout-out from our Chief People Officer for handling the issue with "exceptional resilience and initiative" while also welcoming me to the team. WHERE AM I?!

Millennial Fangirl Moment: There is a Spice Girl at my job today

I have worked myself into some serious anxiety about something that is ultimately Not A Big Deal. My coworkers have reassured me no one but me is upset, they are impressed I took on something so big, and I am deserving of congratulations for doing something new for the first time. Where am I?

Second to last week of the CSA for this year, featuring a very suggestive potato

Serious ego boost today from a few mid-twenties coworkers who were floored when I told them I'm 12 years older than them, not three or four. Drink water, don't smoke, don't drink alcohol in excess, wear sunscreen, moisturizer if you have the energy for it

Week 23: two more this year!

Looking to make a financial gift to a good cause but unsure where to direct your energy? May I present the Campership Fund of my childhood Summer camp, currently celebrating our 75th season! We aim to raise $12,500 by the end of November, will you help us? give.rutgersfoundation.org/4h-camp-fund...

Week 22: Tuna investigates

Week 21: Back to greens

I started a new job today. Not only was I welcomed with cards and flowers but a large number of folks I had not met yet greeted me by name when introducing themselves. It's super refreshing to see people first work culture in action not just words

On round two of wasp treatment because apparently there are regionally specific ones? And also after two weeks of no moths this week I saw at least six.

Hello from here today.

Week 20! Five left for the season after this.