🧵 11 years ago at this time I was a full time grad student, was caring for a palliative uncle in another city, managing his property and affairs, had two young kids at home and was commuting 3-4 hours every day. At a meeting for my MBA class we were trying to schedule our next meeting.

practice radical decency.

You’re at Donnie. I need you at Marie.

youtu.be/-iWc0iLMzh0?... also: release the Epstein files.

look, all I’m saying is that everything is compostable if you give it a million years.

talking with my dad today about putting a dnr in place for my ailing mother. “Well it’s in the Will,” he says. Then a two-beat pause while I let that sink in. #funnynotfunny #butstillprettyfunny

unpopular opinion: the World Series is just mostly Americans working in a Canadian city playing against mostly Americans working in an American city.

oh no all this poverty is affecting the economy….

Excuse my geekiness showing, but Tom Waits’ “Rain Dogs” is as important a record as “Sgt. Peppers” or “Pet Sounds”, and easily my preference of the three.

“the complaints of the privileged are too often confused with the voice of the masses.” -jkg

it’s the bitter that makes you appreciate the sweet though

traffic apps that show you the quickest route as optimal without factoring in the years taken off your life in stress of bumper to bumper traffic.

if I name my next album “fulfillment centre” do you think I could get Bezos to sue me? Could do with some publicity.

*doesn’t win Nobel Peace Prize **starts a war about it

social media has moved us from Reagan-omics to Rage-o-nomics.

one must imagine sisyphus listening to his kate bush playlist

when exactly did we stop ‘stanning’ things? I haven’t stanned anything in a good long while now.

The two best forms of self care during these trying times we are living in are: 1) deciding to do a Ted Lasso re-watch 2) punching Nazis

protect the witches at all costs

sorry, just getting caught up: we’re all supposed to overdose on Tylenol and then we’ll be raptured?

America is just three trench coats in a trench coat isn’t it.

Dear Ambassador Hoekstra: GFY -literally everyone www.cbc.ca/news/politic...

Silly Jimmy Kimmel. He should have just called for all homeless people to be killed and he’d still have a job.

you know what’s super cute is how she forgets she’s a total babe. like, doesn’t even occur to her.

*brings a laser pointer to your cat cafe

still waiting to hear the news story about the maximum wage being lowered

I hate Illinois Nazis.

anyone want to disappear into the forest and start a dog rescue?

I get more than a little old man ragey when I need a minor in computer science to watch my f***ing tv

if I make you a playlist you’d better understand I have spent *hours* agonizing over song order and if you set it to random you may as well just piss on my grave.

This is the kind of grouchy old dude I aspire to be.

Switching to “quiet mode” but for, like, everything

“well never mind: we are ugly, but we have the music.” -janis joplin to leonard cohen

Funny how after years of skinny male fashion, now that millennials are hitting mid-life, baggy is ok again

lost another friend to addiction yesterday. not sure what I did to dodge that particular bullet but I am so grateful. no judgement of anyone, just this weird mix of sadness and gratitude.

I will honour the life and legacy of Tom Lehrer in the only appropriate way: Poisoning Pigeons in the Park

Hunter Biden’s Croptop is a great band name, if no one’s using it yet.

America would you get your shit together I’m missing a ton of concerts on your side of the border.

what if I’m not intelligent enough to use artificial intelligence?

hey, how about another war? that oughta solve everything.

I think we are all done with the self-defence narrative by this point. www.cbc.ca/news/world/i...

honestly, 100 Years of Solitude sounds like underachieving at this point.

they’ll make it look like it was Iran. don’t know what “it” is going to be. but if folks fell for the whole Iraqi WMD’s thing, polarized America will fall over themselves for this. and, for the record, I sincerely hope i am very, very, very wrong.

update on the Canadian boycott of US goods.

I’m not anti-anybody, I’m just anti-asshole. Unfortunately there seems to be a lot more assholes around at the moment.

I unmuted two names I was sick of seeing so I can eat popcorn and watch this shit show. Don’t let anyone dictate what is therapeutic for you.

fuck nudes. show me your pad thai recipe.

“the complaints of the privileged are too often confused with the voice of the masses.” -jkg