JV Vance in the Epstein files, “hello jeff. that leather love seat in the underage sex dungeon not older than 3 years rite ? see you next wknd”

Gonna be a bunch of people tied up in this who just won a trip to Epstein Island on Wheel of Fortune right before they selected the ceramic dog.

look if releasing the full files drives not just the president but a lot of others to commit seppuku, who are we to stop them?

In case you need an afternoon timeline cleanse.

We are all spending way too much brain power on the stupid James Bond writer.

When I work from home sometimes I’m too busy to pet the cat right away. Today was one of those days. Cat responded by bringing me an offering. (He dragged this toy on a stick from upstairs.) He got the pets. #catsky

so I guess my main science-y question... have we always been had the aurora this far south in the US, only everyone has cameras now that can instantly capture it? or is the magnetic field shifting?

Either some light northern lighting or at least a cool camera effect in central Ohio.

Florida State screenshot might keep on giving.

Sources reporting Chuck Schumer was there to make sure there were no positives in the deal for Democrats.

“Door Dash’s State of Local Commerce Report”

Rockstar Games Presents Table Tennis

Kurt Vonnegut making me tear up this morning. Imagine all the joys generative AI is stealing from people outsourcing creation. (and also of course all the jobs.)

Rockstar Games Presents Table Tennis

Awarding myself the game ball for switching the TV input back to normal before everyone thinks the television is broken tomorrow.

7-2! GO BIRDS! 🦅

Is there somehow an outdoor carbon monoxide leak at the stadium?

YoutubeTV ain’t never bringing espn back after that affront to sports.

And of course: Go Birds!

That was the stupidest football game not involving a team from Ohio I’ve ever seen.

That extra kick should be delay of game.

What in the holy fuck are you doing

Brandon Graham and me in the gray beard club.

Blankenship with the classic facemask strip. GOOOOOOO BIRDS!!!

Defensive TD to wrap it up, bruv? Go Birds

2-yard shove here seems risky when they’re going to call the slightest flinch.

I liked it better a couple of minutes ago when the Packers had zero points.

Oh yeah. Devonta is ALSO great. GO BIRDS

When Terrell Owens was being a weirdo it was pretty clear that he was a problem no matter how good he was at football. AJ Brown is in no way whatsoever a problem.

Packers have snapped multiple balls tonight where the play clock is at zero + a beat. Officials having as good a night as the offenses. That was a touchback btw.

Eagles lead the league in offensive 3 and out possessions? HOW DOES THE OC STILL HAVE A JOB?!?

Chuck Schumer did all the play calling for both teams in the first half.

That’s a fumble and some very illegal hands to the face the officials just totally ignored.

Not the same. That guy got rolled up by a normal tackle, not some reckless bullshit. Go Birds.

Bounty out on number 33.

That looks like a bad injury and that’s the guy on the line it’ll hurt the most to lose. Fuck.

Receiver on first down gave up the yards for no good reason. Followed by a shank. Ouch. Go Birds.

Hurts looking over his shoulder to see how close Parsons is. Such a good play. Go Birds!

Watching the Eagles game on regular TV with an antenna like a caveman. Go Birds

get in losers we're Fitzgeraldposting

If his headstone were a toilet, there'd already be a year's long waiting list to shit on his grave. His children would inevitably sell tickets.

yes yes, they hope the giants will undergo a metamorphosis under their new interim coach.

I unironically enjoy the song The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald, but it is also my favorite song to put on repeat on a bar jukebox for 5 spins right as I leave for the night.

This is the sort of thing that makes me think I slipped into an alternate timeline. Just heard of a "prehensile-tailed porcupine" for the first time last week, but now Ozzy is 4? My universe had possums, not adorable prehensile-tailed porcupines.

Thanks to the Canadian Premier League final for helping distract me from America right now. Looking forward to getting an Atletico Ottawa jersey once there aren’t tariffs. #CPLFinal

#FootballNightInAmerica. That should have been a straight red, btw. #CPLFinal

Among some other things, but these center Dems making a shit “deal” is the darkest I’ve felt this entire fascist Republican time. There legit may be no coming back. So that’s where I’m at.

America will never EVER have a real health care solution because that would free Americans from the yoke of forced participation in the corporate employment system.

Democrats had huge election night win 5 days ago and the Democrats in Washington said, "This is unacceptable."

It is 2025 and sports hasn't progressed beyond Browns/Jets?