relevant to many of yalls interests.

what do you mean ROFL isn't a word, spelling bee?

100% agree

If little boys are made of snips and snails and puppy dog tails, and little girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice, our resident expert has informed us that little nonbinaries are made of pineapple, cats, and demon rats.

today I experienced Supervised Peeing by An Cat.

look, I get that you want to play the piano. however, (a) you live in a townhouse and (b) it is 9pm. and (c) I want to sleep.

attorneys in your area now using hallucination machine to cross examine expert witnesses. click here for more info! /s

happy no pants thursday (observed)!

it just took me three tries to put my shirt on correctly. I really hope this is not an omen for the rest of the day.

being up this early on a weekend should be illegal

where does all the snot come from?

for the record: IAD, not ever again.

I fucking love social media sometimes, I swear, especially when we're all just giant fucking nerds about incredibly cool shit

home again jiggety jig.

I wanted to be the medical examiner. partway through undergrad I realized med school was not for me.

newark, I am in you

is there anyone who *enjoys* weaving in their tails?

A wild-eyed Christopher Lloyd explaining that the only way to close the inter-dimensional wormhole from the Cubs winning the World Series is to play another World Series in the "null hour" when clocks are turned back.

bases loaded one out for both teams in consecutive half innings no runs this game has lost its god damn mind

Dear Macy's, It's Halloween for another hour yet. Cool your jets on the Christmas commercials.

evidence description of the day: DNA swab of revolver gun

current earworm: Inspector Gadget

gd save me from the idiots I work with.

why does subscapularis have to be such a whiny baby diva?

1 locus, 14 peaks

someone text captain ian the score. I bet his phone isn't on airplane mode.

if the cubs manage to win the world series this year, will that close the hellmouth they opened in 2016?

5g update in progress

....I shouldn't need 2 YouTube videos and and Instagram reel to figure out how to open this pump bottle.

today's insult to coffee: a spoon of instant + 3 spoons of international delight.

happy, healthy, peaceful, new year, y'all. maybe this year will be better than the last.

“Whoever designed the human visual system has a lot to answer for. Maybe not as much as the knee team, or the lower back group, but a lot.” - @kjhealy.co , making me shoot my afternoon coffee out my nose.

I want to know who at the Tim Hortons corporate office said "You know what this famously Canadian chain needs? More outdoor seating."

for @rahaeli.bsky.social

toenail in a Doritos bag is my next band name.

You breastfeed ONE bat and suddenly it’s a crisis! 😵

am I misremembering, or was there a time when those frisky teenaged wizards used a contraceptive ~spell called "fetus deletus"?

reposting this for @benwolfevision.bsky.social

you just don't get that many missionaries among root vegetables. @tkingfisher.com, you're killing me (in a good way)

@tkingfisher.com 2 chapters in and I've already cackled several times. i trust the remaining chapters will continue in this vein.

Glory unto the Shitty Nostradamus!

happy 18 years working for the same employer to me.

for my next trick, I will put my phone down and sleep.

also someone is eating pistachios and I might need to scream.

the electrician was supposed to be here at 8:30 for a final inspection. it's now 10:10. taking bets on when they'll actually show up.

The amount of work some people will do to avoid doing work is truly, truly staggering.

Rincewind is there to remind us that actually great and heroic adventures are terrifying and awful most of the time better to hang out at home, where it is quiet and nothing is trying to kill you if you’re really lucky maybe you’ll have a potato

no thank you