Scorpios are like if a heist was a person.

We’ve all had a good time making fun of Olivia Nuzzi’s pencil thin eyebrows in those glamour shots. However, I regret to inform you, and this is in no way an endorsement of what l'm about to tell you, but actually those eyebrows are coming back into style.

I don’t know why fireworks are going off, so I’m just going to assume it’s because there is a new Ken Burns doc on PBS.

My top five movie genres: -shark eats hot teens -Victorian Londoners killed by a mysterious presence amid a thick fog -surprise! This genre film is a love story -big monster -all the guys in this sweaty room have loosened their ties

Why is it impossible to find bone in chicken breasts in LA? Did someone declare rib meat to be cringe?

I know this is product placement, but the headline sounds like someone struggling to admit their depression

That’s right I’m oppressing the Bostonians

I simply cannot know any more about Olivia Nuzzi and RFK Jr. I can’t. Do you hear me?

It has been way too long since I’ve heard Matthew Macfadyen’s American accent.

I just *know* this is going to end in a tumble to the floor mid sleep.

HASTINGS: I say, Poirot, this vial’s labeled “hyaluronic acid”! Is it a poison? SKINCARE HERCULE POIROT: Non, mon ami. This acid, it replenishes the skin’s barrier naturale HASTINGS: So this is a gal who takes care of her skin. SKINCARE HERCULE POIROT: *irritated* The gentleman may use it as well

when u off a guy and now you’re responsible for this dumbass boat

King and Conqueror is an incandescent hate watching experience. Edward the Confessor beats Emma of Normandy to death with his bare hands. Imagine making a tv show about the Norman invasion and feeling the need to ADD extra violence, like “I know! Let’s sex it up by having this guy kill his mom!”

Honestly, it’s one of the better top four I’ve seen. Ordinary People is what clinches it.

New program gives every American Jew a chance to attend a marathon screening of every Mel Brooks film. “Mirthright,” we’ll call it.

TV shows about angry blond ladies fighting AI with their bare hands. More of this.

Took a walk to go vote and almost immediacy fell in with several other women wearing headphones and carrying ballots. There was a line at the drop box. So, anecdotally the turnout for prop 50 is pretty good.

Enlightened is a must see.

Cats have evolved to have their meows sound like a human baby’s cry, the better to manipulate their caretakers. Unless they are nearing 20 years old. If a cat that old wants a little ear rub, he will unleash a scratchy, unmodulated wail like a summoning from the fire lakes of hell.

Me this morning: oh nice, an extra hour! Me at 5PM: oh the darkness has come.

Do the children even know that exercise leggings used to not have pockets? That we had to carry our phones and tuck our keys inside our socks, like animals?

I want to enjoy season 4 of The Witcher, but it’s distracting how new Geralt looks just like Henry Cavill if you took an eraser tool to 30% of his facial features.

I love Clifton’s Cafeteria in LA and I had no idea the founder was so bad ass.

I spent two weeks leaf peeping in New England, but it didn’t officially become fall until just now, when I made soup.

Emma Thompson and Ruth Wilson are starring in a show together and no one thought to tell me? No one thought hey this is relevant to Sean's interests (beautiful, somewhat mean-looking women who have used a VCR)?

When he says “hit it, Joe”, I don’t think first time viewers are going to be prepared for just how hard Joe hits it.

They are writing children’s books specifically about 2025 now.

If you see an otter steal a surfboard, no you didn’t.

Boy, eating an apple hits different when you are looking at foliage.

I feel that, as a resident of California, I should be able to enjoy episode drops in PST no matter where I happen to be.

There is life, and a hunger for treats, in the old boy yet.

I learned something last night that shook me to my core, and I think everyone deserves to know: kids don’t get lollipops at the doctor’s office anymore.

A useful feature on here would be a way for people to tag their own posts as ꜱᴘᴏʀᴛꜱ for when they’re just posting HOLY SHIT or THIS GUY out of context

Starbucks has protein coffee now and I know I should be making fun but honestly, I don’t hate it.

I haven’t posted Byron enough lately, so here he is with his banana stuffy.

The reason I prefer Bluesky over Meta is that Bluesky doesn’t repeatedly suggest I follow a guy I went on three dates with two years ago.

Made a regrettable error when I dashed into Ralph’s for “a few things” during the last hours of a fast.

One of my neighbors is playing a woodwind instrument and attempting to learn the theme song to the Poirot television show from the 90s. I’ve never rooted for anyone so hard.

Imagine choosing to divorce Nicole Kidman. Couldn’t be me.

I just cannot remember the name of the movie. “Have you seen One Thing After Another?” -me

I know a squirrel is not exactly a rare sighting, but I had a rather lengthy starting contest with this guy and it made going outside worth it.

Random internet trolls should not be able to get away with ruining a good person’s life simply because she (fully legally!) posted a joke about them on the internet. If you have anything to spare to help my friend fight back against this monster please donate.

No one yelled at me, but I did have to get a license photo taken in humid weather.

Really interesting tidbits in this latest NYT focus group

I have a DMV appointment this morning. I’m a fully grown adult who has had a license for many years, so obviously I was up all night worried that someone at the DMV would yell at me.

Curled up under a blanket, full of vaccines, and Jurassic World Rebirth is available for rent. So ready for this dumb movie.

LA is having one of those good sunsets tonight.

Imagine being so hot that you need to soothe people you encounter so they don’t get spooked.

For a while we had combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell drive through restaurants, and everything in this country has gone to shit since they disappeared. Something to think about.

It is fucked up what they did to the headphone jack