let's all go to mcdonalds and ask for the alvin and the chipmunks burger

Now instead of sk*eets, we're calling them Squirts on bluesky

(pops up from behind a bush) sup fuckhead !

Have I pissed you off yet today? No? Well then… f*ck you very much, shit bitch! How about now? …good. 😈

I call him Still Wancil. Just kidding I don’t call him shit, because I don’t give a fuck about his funky little ass.

Crypto moron loses life savings by being a dipshit. Wow big news… sike. Die

Dying for someone to post a picture of their food so I can harass them with my pig photo

Yelling “YARP” while burping

Here's you, bitch

Frrrrrrtttttt... ppppppbbbthhhttthhhhbblllblbl...

Getting vitamin shots from a guy named Doc Poop

Let’s pull up in the parking lot tonight and rev our engines bsky.app/profile/skyr...

imagine a truck with a banner that says “dookie mobile”

Rolling around town in my Dodge Coochie XL

Try to draft me scumbags see what happens

That moment where bro posts peak and wins the internet for the day!

These eleven words will make you bust instantly, says cock scientist.

Seven guys walk into a bar: Doug Dookie Doug Poop Doug Shit Diarrhea Doug Doug Crap Doug “Shit” Feces and Doug Doodoo The bartender wrinkles up his nose and shouts, “Ey! What stinks in here???”

All morons with dumb ass opinions need to GET OFF my website, and then eat shit and die!

You want me to come over there and shit on ya ass?

Shit and crap is my bread and butter

I’m pining for a “damn it’s true” moment

let me call you back boss I’m with a custoid right now [hangs up] i’ve been dreaming of ways to serve you.

Architects are oft named some bull-spit like Arvi Pubenen.. Or Dyck Van Baals... For Real

beat tweets. there are more, of course. DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH @prefectbeanis.bsky.social @brendle.bsky.social

Here’s what it looks like when the Hulk takes a shit.

Here’s what it looks like when the Hulk takes a shit.

Meeting up with my friend Weed Peed

BRAAAAAAAAAP!!!

Thinking of spicing things up by referring to my penis as my “woody”

Roll up to your house, knock on your door, and poop my pants off (Poop em off, poop em off) Bitch I pooped my pants off

Hey shithead, come take a picture of me sniffing this cigar.

Candy does seven things—it relieves your hunger, quenches your thirst, fills your stomach, cleans your teeth, makes you sleep, helps you digest, and colors your cheeks.

Hey meatball. Go head down to Jamba Juice and get me something sweet.

Hey dingleberry. Go to the freezer and get me a Fat Boy.

Hey dumbass. Go get me a pop.

Hey needle dick. Go get me Mike’s Hard Lemonade.

Hey shithead dickhead fuckhead. Go get me a Marie Callendar’s Chicken Pot Pie with Tender White Meat Chicken.

Bluesky now has over 10 million users, and “Terry T. Turdlet” was #141,569!

Here's the problem with turds: they fuckin stink.

Animal Farm is a cautionary tale about why the animals would have been better off if the farmer killed them and turned them into dinner

I heard someone talk about getting a blow job in a movie last night and I asked my older brother Greg what they was and he said it was when a lady puts a man’s peanus on a pile of ice cubes and blows on it so it gets really cold

Go ahead and laugh, you fucking moron. If you heard the Wilhelm Scream in real life, you’d freak the fuck out.

Chuck Norris farted so hard that he blew his asshole out of his pants like a 12 gauge shotgun slug and then died. When they did the autopsy they found 30 lbs of baked beans mixed with dog crap in his stomach.