Life’s too short to not think about Hole

Getting back at my evil ex by supporting Salvation Army

Hewwo pwincess :) Send me envelopes of poo or daddy will get mad >:€

Get in losers we’re going to therapy

MomDad and DadMom are fighting

“i cannot wait to do nothing all day” says girl who feels horrible after doing nothing all day

parce que t'es chopped et t'es washed

Paying homage to the boob tree

Getting a bachelors has made me allergic to words with more than 2 syllables (I am breaking out in hives right now)

So I’m going swimming in Austin Texas. I may have to do some landscaping

Je suis trop gourmande, aromf

"hey lizard, wanna know why you're warshed?" *said extremely casually*

No girl, you're not nothingburger!!!! You've everything bagel 🥹😍

“Harry Potter and the half blood Italian” -emlyn

Guys what if we brought back yeet

We’re doing it all again baby

Getting slutshamed for preferring queer spaces is really funny bc you’re not wrong but why you gotta assume that

Apparently I don’t have a nine to five, I have a nine to thrive

Gronion udon boner

Can we go 5 mins without someone crashing out

John Lennon got shot shot shot shot shot shots (of estrogen) everybody

I am hilarious and beloved by all but mostly… I’m humble

“You got that wet gender vibe”

They are burning me at the stake for my whimsy and joie de vivre

What do you call …………………… something something Dykea

Bed hair? I hardly know hair

Aromfing big oil. You’re welcome

@3ther34lboxy.bsky.social is the only fool we need

Found all the puppy girls in an enclosure. Call that a shih tzu

Helth

To the tune of F Me pumps: “And you can’t fly quite right Cuz your wings are too small And your belly is full of fish” @beetchfeukyoue.bsky.social

Goon but not forgotten

“who you calling beanie?”- my bottom growth to me

hand on my thigh??? Before marriage?????

No philosofficer its hi how are you

Pekoe tea w/ a biscuit 👌

"some things get lost in the wash, you get found in the wash"

“Justin Castro the father of Canadian colonialism” @3ther34lboxy.bsky.social

It’s a chasecret @3ther34lboxy.bsky.social

"doctor, my hooha's out of whack" - some bitch

When ur male coworker says "can you stay longer" instead of "happy international women's day my Queen. You must not lift a finger today"

Does a double negative equal a positive when it comes to Covid tests

Dropping trou on fisgard

“An egg is the best way I can express my frustration”

Having combined coffee and stimulants will either make me unlock the 25th hour of the day, continue obsessively cutting my hair or have a panic attack

It was Jod -Lav

pansexuals with postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome. Or as I call them pans with pots

@manicpixidckgrl.bsky.social happy Ash Wednesday to Catholic Jane

The holy trinity: mourning loathing and pining