next year at pride i’m gonna open up a booth that teaches everyone how to use an ironing board

i love cooking for only me because i can put dill on literally everything and no one can stop me

drew the best cat i’ve ever drawn last night just so everyone knows

pulled what i thought was some sort of seed off my neck when i got home from work. imagine my shock when i open my hand and its a bee

burnt my stomach making pasta they’re calling me the clumsiest girl around

how do i get a job at the long bacon store

you will NEVER believe what’s back!

sometimes my mom texts me something so incomprehensible i decide to just live with the mystery

what possessed me to be showing up to my retail job at cabelas in 2022 in my full 1960s beat like who did i think i was

drawing something middle school me would love

group hangout at my tetanus booster shot appointment

GOD BLESS MY HOMOSEXUAL COWORKER

today i watched a turkey vulture fly around above me as i worked and it felt like he was waiting for me to die of heat stroke so he could eat me maybe

up late sewing and kind of contemplating and moping and brooding while i do it. like girls my age have been doing forever and ever and ever i imagine

i’m so good at taking a full free day to be productive and turning it into a 4 hour nap on the couch

i need to play horses. i need to play horses for one million hours every day

i actually really like my inability to be normal about things i like

schedule for tonight got ruined so now i gotta sleep to reset the day good night world

my hair salon closed permanently yesterday and only sent out the email today wtf am i supposed to do now

JUNE 24TH!!! #DELTARUNE

doodled today!! i still know how to do it!!!!!

i haven’t drawn literally anything at all for like 2 months and that’s like the one thing i normally do consistently! so much for drawing more this year

“i’m gonna do so much this summer” i say as i go to bed at 7

blending my smoothie at 7 in the morning i pray my neighbours will not kill me

forgot that a possible outcome when i pay to see a movie in theatres is that i may not like it that much

i’ve been doing so well lately so i’m being punished with these ugly ass tan lines

going to the evil wasteland of doom and pain (grocery store)

today at work i coughed and dust came out #okay

if i could fit a fist in my vagina surely i could fit a bluetooth speaker in my vagina

incredible things happening at the toy fair

it is possible to feel so maternal over a stuffed rabbit ESPECIALLY after you make him little wire glasses

there’s a crow and a seagull fighting on the roof of the building next to mine i think the seagull is winning

twisting around in my hammock until i am thoroughly cocooned

life is so good when i am in bed by 9

they were in that cafeteria ready to crucify this kid for saying he wants to bake a crème brûlée

i need ryan from highschool musicals collection of newsboy caps i need the green sequin one so bad

dude it’s the 22nd pilot

i neeeed to be knowing what this sheep detectives movie has going on

person biking the wrong direction in the bike lane got mad at ME for scaring her. how that work.

does anyone get hyped for shark week on the discovery channel anymore

“i cannot wait to do nothing all day” says girl who feels horrible after doing nothing all day

it’s the afternoon and this bird just got a worm. is he allowed to do that.

in true race horse spirit i am being pumped full of steroids #yay

sorry for being gone they’re torturing me but in increasingly ridiculous ways i’m starting to feel like a rat being experimented on

it hurts to talk but unfortunately i also find the way i sound right now very funny. i am at a crossroads

lost my voice if anyone finds it let me know i don’t have a reward or anything sorry

it's neigh big

they invented shows where the premise is surviving in the alaskan wilderness specifically to captivate me and also my dad

are they still looking for like treasure or whatever on oak island, when is someone gonna step in, it’s been like over 20 years

this is some secret squirrel shit