Had to ask lifeguard if he could intervene with the man, who had been sat on the edge of the lane, picking his feet & tossing it in the water for 20mins. Apparently not. They can't interfere. This was not an answer I was happy with. What is it with men & swimming pools?

He's either walking as though there's something up his bottom, or there's something coming out of his bottom.

My mum helpfully phoned me this morning to tell me to "watch out for wildfires" then told me off for being so sarcastic when I replied. She clearly has spare time today and so I eagerly await amassed 'clippings' from the Daily Mail being posted outlining how I have failed as a human, woman, mother.

It isnt even day one of the summer holidays (that is tomorrow) and I am already bribing him to do his 10mins of Maths and English. Bribe, coax, cajol and inducing.

My son is doing his 11+ next term so I got a whole load of vocab flash cards and tbh, I have never been more astute, adept, adroit, alert, apt, capable, competent and discerning.

...when did that stop, when did we become more polarised and tribal? Is it a tech thing - anyone modern history know?

Talking to a cartoonist about his characters and he was saying that in the 1980s you would go to a party and there would be a huge mix of people from all walks of lives - really diverse. Other than sport, (and clubbing) I was thinking I have never been to lots of parties like that. I am in my 40s.

Sorry for the delay! We've consulted our pool of retired officers and a 1978 joiner remembers them being as you say whereas a 1980 joiner remembers being issued with them as standard. So hopefully that answers your question!

Tomorrow is the 31st anniversary of the #Srebrenica #Genocide and the beginning of the mass executions of over 8,000 people. Honour them by better understanding what happened. I worked on this resource below and it remains one of the things I am most proud of. srebrenica.sense-agency.com/en/

Son's last day at school today. I reckoned I had about 4 hours to tidy up a draft been working on all year. Was checking secondary refs and sources to them. Got a bit deep. Clicked a link. SHOULD NOT HAVE CLICKED THAT LINK. Rewrite of about half the paper now.

Went to put the bin out, a bloody great bat flew out and walloped me in the face. I can't figure out if this is good luck or I am about to die of a horrible bat bourne disease.

The person who mentally dragged me through my MA at Birmingham, @emiliastu.bsky.social is on here! She is great.

I hope Binface wins just so he can finally move the hand dryer at Uxbridge. And also the whole racist Grifter Toby Jug thing.

WAIT FOR IT WAIT. FOR. IT! 🪶 🐣

Game on, Nige.

Any Clacton residents who want to nominate your friendly neighbourhood intergalactic space warrior, ping me a line!

Calling a by-election over the sovereign right of every MP to take secret gifts from a convicted criminal. What a time to be alive.

Party political broadcast there by the BBC. Poor old Clacton. Once again the grifter grifts, suspends his investigations and costs the taxpayer a fortune whilst stirring up his divisive shtick.

Saying you're the "most physically attacked" MP when two MPs have been killed in the last decade is just horribly self-absorbed.

The level of insight is astonishing

IF he steps down as MP, does that mean he is still in charge of Reform PLC. Do the two go together? Can he still grift away using the company? How accountable is that and surely his tax returns should be noting all these things. FFS. I am so invested now, the bastard.

Its going to be a big 'I'm the victim' whine. That is all. "everyone else is to blame for me being a toby jug faced grifter" "establishment, bla bla, MSM"

Friend just got asked to write a chapter for a book on equality & respect within her field for a new book from Bloomsbury. Asked the fee. Zero. They don’t pay authors. Needless to say she said no and pointed out the audacity and irony. Is that normal on the commercial side?

I don’t normally enjoy one-sided football matches, but hoping Belgium do us all a favour by reaching double figures.

In 1978 inner city London, met police had to ask permission from sergent to check out handcuffs for personal use. They weren't general issue for patroling police. I didnt know this, and maybe it is just me. But wow. Is that right @mpsheritage.bsky.social ?

Another police interview completed. I have really enjoyed this series of discussions and the participants that have pushed me in different directions than expected. Begining to humanise the men & woman that stood on both sides of the barricades at Wapping has been such an incredible experience.

I also dont think this is said enough, or appreciated the way it should be, but Michael Fassbender. On so many levels. Michael Fassbender.

Me, my knee brace, hormonal acne, Coke tshirt and scruffy trainers was ushered into the staff room at Halfords whilst the puncture (ffs) gets fixed. No one else was - including the lady with a baybee. I am clearly lowering the tone. It is lovely. Window wide open and boxes of oil and paper towels

Took the boys to see Supergirl. It was good. Milly Alcock was fantastic. The one that she was protecting was awful - really wooden, and I am still not sure what or why Jason Momoa was doing, plus it was overlong, but very enjoyable. Boys agreed in the main. #blueskybarrynorman

This is the best personal website for so many reasons but the tetris is inspired.

my kind of Jubilee, the Japanese national team vs. 100 kids

Once more defeated by the OS maps online. Excellent waste of afternoon melting. Everyone else manages to use them, is there some sort of OS archive maps overlay and able to download for dummies please? Off to moider something.

We had a heatwave in the summer of 76 and just got on with it. Back then the sun was known as Ra and his word was gospel. We fired 12 people from each community into the sun to appease him. Only four came back, but they were... different. Hose pipe ban was on. We got by visiting the old haunted well

Best decisions we have made in the past two years have strangely NOT been buying a Michael Fassbender triptych, but the solar panels and aircon. Coming out the bedroom this am was like walking into a sauna. Sitting on this pleater seat in shorts may rank as worst decision when I have to move.

Yesterday I found out the Young Ones Vivians hamster was called SPG. I am still laughing. I had no idea they were that culturally embedded (I sound like a wanker here, but not sure how else to phrase it). The challenge is now to get that into the chapter on policing. Easy.

Very proud of this one: Incarcerated: Contemporary Photography from the Victorian Prison It's been a delight to work with @andyaitchison.bsky.social, Dominique Moran, Yvonne Jewkes, & Jennifer Turner. Seeing Andy's wonderful work in print is quite something. insidetime.org/newsround/in...

A prime minister, a US ambassador, a prince, a spin dr. To a greater or lesser extent individually, but all brought down by Epstein (in KS case, it was a nudge that gave way to a skid). How many in the US have been held accountable?

Dad & I are not same politically, but managed to agree there needs to be a very honest national conversation then a clear strategy/impact of failure on defense, housing, welfare/pensions, tax coding, Healthcare, Work/education, Media needs to be a responsible part of that. So that'll never happen

Blimey, someone needs to test the wee of the German manger and support staff. I have no idea how they get away with behaviour like that. Such a bad tempered side.

My favourite four frame story of all time. #WorldCup

On Wednesday I'm giving my online talk for @citylit.bsky.social ‘The World of the London Bodysnatchers’, 7.30pm. We'll tour some of London’s lesser-known graveyards and meet the Resurrection Men, who made a profit from other people's tragedies To book: www.citylit.ac.uk/courses/the-...

Where’s Andy Burnham going?

Museum of London reopens November and I will be there for Syd. www.londonmuseum.org.uk/collections/...

Delivery man gave me package, tried to say have a lovely day, came out "I love you" - he turned around, looked me in the eye and said, "I love you too" then walked off chuckling. In these times of utter shitty shit - most people are alright. I love you.

Manchester friends! I'm doing an event with the wonderful organiser and urban historian Isaac Rose an another launch for the paperback of Liverpool and the Un-Making of Britain. Spread the word and sign up here: www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/manchester...

Do it Keir, go out on a high

Join the Team! We are recruiting for a Learning Officer and Collections Engagement and Access Officer, two new roles at an exciting time in the development of this Grade I listed, literary house museum in the historic heart of London. www.drjohnsonshouse.org/jobs

I've become a bit addicted to the Reddit of people posting screenshots of their garmins on the stress score metrics after massive events (break ups, deaths, wedding day, moving house). I thought this surprise enforced rest would mean catching up on books, but nooooooooo

🧵England players who don't look like footballers. 1. DAVID SEAMAN. Looks like your mate's dad at primary school. Has a Vauxhall Carlton and when he drives you both home he says "Guess what mum's got for afters? Angel Delight!" and laughs when you both cheer (met him recording a pilot btw).

I've had some minor knee surgery so decided to watch the last mission impossible tonight, knee up. It's great. Cheesy AF but for that genre, it's a class example. Not as good as no 1 but not much is. Miles better than Maverick which was utter shit. #barrynormanofthesocials